While it seems that I have lost my total readership, fear not, boys and girls, I still retain my puckish sense of humor...oh happy day, would that such were true... And yet, perhaps...all is never won nor lost. For example, If Obama wins the Democratic nomination, as seems most likely, and then loses the general election, he will still have contributed much to American culture. Such contributions as: If you encounter a fella who has been emasculated by his domineering wife, you will no longer need to resort to the heretofore common, two word vulgarity to describe him. Now, you can simply say, "He's been Michelled," and everybody will know what you mean. If you're ever in a meeting and one of your co-workers blabs on and on, using a lofty vocabulary while, all the time, saying nothing of substance, you'll be able to shut him up by simply saying, "Man, quit playing the Obama." Should you be in a capacity in which you hire new people for your organization and a young man applies for an important position within your firm, even though he has none of the experience such a position requires, you can explain and justify your reasoned rejection of his application by simply stating, "The dude is an Obama." If you're in a situation where a gift is being given to you and you open the handsomely wrapped and ribboned package only to find that there is nothing within it, you can save face, display your coolness and go right along with the practical joke by stating, "Just what I've always wanted, my very own Obama." If you're applying for a job and you've fabricated some parts of your resume and exaggerated all of the other sections and your lack of veracity is discovered, apologize immediately, beg for mercy and claim, "Please forgive me, I had a bad attack of the Obamas, but it'll never happen again." If expediency and personal gain cause you to publicly scorn and humiliate one of your dearest and trusted friends, just explain away your cowardice by telling him, "No big deal, brother, it was just an Obama moment." I'm sure he will understand. First there was Al Gore, who invented the internet...then there was John Kerry, he of the pink silk ties and the speedo wearing windsailing...now there is the "Black Jack Kennedy." I can hardly wait to see what out of the mainstream, elitist prissy pants the Democrats nominate in 2012. Fear not Boy George, there still may be a future for you yet. God love the Democrats, they find such unique and interesting methods of snatching defeat out of the jaws of victory...same as it ever was, since 1980. See ya later, boys and girls. Your farmer friend, Soybeansam P. S. In two of the last three elections you Lose by 41 points and 35 points and then you have the chutzpah to hold a Victory rally in Iowa??? Someone's forgotten their Critical Thinking lessons haven't they? | 
