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Name: Michelle
Country: United States
Metro: Washington D.C.
Interests: God, Cedarville University, teasing my friends, social work, Tyler (my nephew), friends, Chuck's, collecting hospital bracelets (don't ask)
Expertise: being Michelle ;)
Occupation: Student
Industry: Other
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
5/17/2004
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| "Birthday Dinner"Every year, our family gathers at my grandma's house in Arlington for dinner to celebrate whoever's birthday it is - me, Shauna, our parents, Grandma, and my uncle. Last night was my turn!
There was a great dinner, a REALLY great cake, and presents. And I appreciate all of that.
But the BEST part was actually being a family.
Many of you may not understand that, but those closer to me may know that these dinners do NOT typically go well. My uncle creates a lot of tension, going on and on and ON about politics and he is VERY racist - which frustrates the rest of us. I dread these gatherings most of the time.
But last night was AMAZING.
We were talking after dinner and we were LAUGHING. Together. ALL of us.
***
I thought I'd share with you some of what made us laugh, especially my stepdad. My grandpa had this parrot - his name was Gobbles. (Actually his name was Kelly but he gobbled like a turkey - no joke - so when we were little we called him Gobbles and the name stuck.) Earl never knew Gobbles, as he came along a couple years after Grandpa died. Anyway, somehow we started talking about pets which led to Gobbles. So we shared some of our favorite "Gobbles memories." 
- Gobbles could sound like a flushing toilet. Until my mom figured that out, it used to freak her out SO badly because she thought someone was in the house when they weren't supposed to be. Caused her many a panic attack.
- Gobbles could also RING. You know, like a telephone. It was SO FUNNY when we'd be in the other room down the hall, hear it, and my grandpa would answer the phone... he was THAT GOOD!
- Gobbles used to yell at Shauna & I if we came into the kitchen at night. He'd scream, "Bad girls! Bad girls!"
- Gobbles also enjoyed yelling, "Bad dog! Bad dog!," punishing the doggie for no good reason.
- Gobbles would talk to the people on the other end of the phone if it rang. When my grandpa's voice would rise, Gobbles would say, "Hello! Hello! Oh, go to Hell!" Yeah... he liked to cuss people out.
- Gobbles could, as stated, gobble like a turkey. It was very accurate for never actually HEARING a turkey.
- Gobbles could sing opera. Seriously! I don't know how to explain it but he did it and sometimes he would CRY at the end. Like he'd sing this one particular sequence of notes, and then sound like he was crying!! Then he'd turn his neck so his head looked upside-down. We never really understood why but we always said Gobbles' singing scared himself.
- Gobbles sometimes was allowed out of the cage - my grandpa would open it occasionally and Gobbles would fly around the kitchen a few times, then go back in his cage. Well, one day Grandma came over, and Gobbles was walking across the kitchen floor. All of the sudden, he flew into Grandma's hair! Then he chased her down the hallway! Let's just say that if that cage was opened, Grandma was behind closed doors after that.
- Gobbles would attack ANYONE wearing red. Grandpa learned this quickly, as Sundays were the days he changed the water & newspapers, and he'd wear his "Washington Golf & Country Club" sweater, which was bright red, on Sundays cuz that was usually when we'd go to the Club. He got bit repeatedly until one day, he wore a different color, and Gobbles didn't attack him! So if anyone went near Gobbles or the cage was open, from that time forward, the color red was forbidden. Gobbles hated red.
AND... the one that led to Gobbles actually being at my Grandpa's house in the first place!!!!!!!
My grandpa had a niece who had Gobbles. This niece was married to a guy named Rob. Every afternoon at exactly the time Rob got home from work, Gobbles would say, "Rob! Rob! Rob!" over and over and over. Well, the niece ditched Rob and got remarried! But still, EVERY DAY at exactly the right time, Gobbles would sway back & forth screaming "Rob! Rob! Rob!" The niece was informed that SOMEONE had to go - so away Gobbles went, to my grandpa's house, providing many a panic attack & laugh over the years.
It was nice to remember fun times. Even if NOBODY reading this thinks those memories are funny, it doesn't matter, because to me they are funny and, more importantly, the represent the good in my life in the midst of so much bad. Those are memories that nobody can take away from me. And last night was a great memory to have as well.
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| The following seven words sum up everything Mary told me before she did this:
"You will never lose me. I promise."
Those last two words had 2 lines under them.
In this case in particular, I'm referring to something she wrote in a journal of mine. It was several pages of her telling me why I was a good friend, what she gained from having me in her life, and why she would never, ever let go, no matter what. She wrote it because I still wasn't able to accept at that time that she truly cared or that she truly needed me, and her writing things gave me something to look at when I was especially tempted to do something, reminding me that someone cared and that it wasn't just me who got hurt when I fell to self-injury.
During the 2 months I didn't hear from her, I looked at that whenever my heart could take it. I was so scared, so confused, so sometimes it just made it worse to read her words because I was TERRIFIED that they were lies & they didn't matter anymore. I still have every single letter she wrote and card she sent, packed up in a couple boxes with everything she's given me (with the exception of a teddy bear, which is the ONLY thing I keep in sight - she gave it to me so that I'd always have part of her with me, protecting me in the sense that rather than cut I could hold on to it so my hands were physically occupied and not doing anything bad). But I can't look at those things... and I CANNOT look at a picture of her. I accidentally clicked the wrong button on my computer photo library and her face popped up, and I LITERALLY got sick. Then I started hyperventilating and took hours to really stop crying. Sometimes I hear her voice in my head, and sometimes I'll smell something that brings a memory back - especially this one scent of hand sanitizer & lotion, I got it for the flights to & from visiting her and if I smell it at all, I lose it.
The truth is, I could give you THOUSANDS of words she's written - let alone the ones she's said. And they are in her words, not mine - and not only on the computer, but in her handwriting. So when I say "she promised & she's lying about breaking promises," I DO have the proof to back it up. If that isn't enough, call my therapist - she met Mary, talked with her, and HEARD her make promises & say things she is now lying about. If you're going to break promises, have the guts to face it rather than take the cowardly way out and not only do wrong but deny doing it.
Here is a thought for those who might not believe that I truly did accept she would never leave once the psych meds were building, especially during the time I wasn't talking with Mary while she was breaking more promises & avoiding me rather than telling me what the heck was going on.
*Half a week AFTER we lost touch, I was so convinced that there was a logical explanation & that it would be over soon that I SWITCHED PHONE companies. Signed a Two-Year contract with HER provider!!!!!! Does that sound like someone who knew something was wrong, the way Mary claims I knew from the first night? Umm... NO. I switched because I wanted us to not talk so much (something I wanted to say during a conversation, not email, as I had no way of knowing she was feeling those things & therefore didn't know how she'd take it)... so when we DID talk, I wanted it to count, so if we were on the same company, if the most convenient time for that wasn't during the "free nights & weekends" times it would be FREE any time.
* The day after we lost touch, I believed everything was okay enough that I went to yet another ADA event. I went to a diabetes walk when it was very difficult physically and raised HUNDREDS of dollars and gave a HUGE amount of my own money because I wanted to do everything I possibly could to help. I took the picture of Mary & I together that I've taken to every ADA event, and when people asked why I was walking, I showed them that picture. I told them she was my best friend & my sister and I was SO PROUD of that fact. I knew Mary wasn't perfect but I thought she was good, loving, caring, honest, decent... human rather than the monster who haunts me to this day. If I'd known something was wrong on Friday night, I would have been WAY too upset to do that walk on Saturday. Again, proving I didn't know what was going on.
* One of the MAIN things I've pointed out is this: in the emails & letters & texts I sent, almost every single one said the SAME THING, how many days it had been since I heard from her, what was going on, was something wrong, was she breaking promises, why wasn't she answering me, BEGGING her to at least tell me what was going on rather than drag it out & TORTURE me the way MARY KNEW it would. If I'd actually gotten something from her explaining things, WHY wouldn't I address them? If it was bad news, why would I still be asking what was up & trying to get through to her rather than actually REACTING to the bad news?? Doesn't make sense.
Sometimes I wonder why Mary believes doing this was okay. She said some things about God, but getting CLOSER to Him doesn't mean getting FURTHER from His expectations. Making sacrifices for Him is good, but not when what you're sacrificing is following HIS plan of reconciliation and love and forgiveness. Mary is THE most unforgiving person I've ever met - even if I did what she says I did (and I didn't), even then she is instructed to love and to forgive. God does NOT say to push away other believers... and Mary didn't show any interest whatsoever in working ANYTHING out. Didn't ask questions, tell me what was really going on, nothing. And in her letter to the court - which will NOT be used, as we will never be able to use her letter due to its contents & lies and she is the only person who I was really 100% open with over the past few years - she SAID she knows that my memory issues are NOT intentional. And I offered to waive ALL of my confidentiality rights so she could talk to ANY of the people treating me - neuro, therapy, psych doctor, pain management, primary, whoever - and ask any questions, confirm what I've told her, get better explanations of what's going on, all to offer her proof that this is real, that I'm not knowingly lying and my therapist can back up what I've said about hearing nothing (since my family & friends wouldn't mean anything to her) as she lived through it with me. I NEVER asked her to just accept all of this, because I KNOW it's confusing and I'd want others to be able to back it up as well. I offered her a chance to seriously realize the truth to it all on her own, but she refuse. HINT: if you're going to say you tried, don't turn that down without even SAYING you'd like to speak to my physical & mental health care teams. She told a friend of mind that she was done trying... but you can't be done before you start.
In closing, there is one more thought that I wish Mary would at least TRY to get through her stubborn head: if you are feeling controlled, that does NOT mean someone is attempting or desires to control you. You can FEEL controlled, but perhaps that is because you have ALLOWED it control you rather than someone else forcing it on you.
I say this because Mary said she was controlled & NEVER told me she felt that way - used it against me without even telling me beforehand.
She ALWAYS said, "It's my choice. I WANT this." I asked her repeatedly to promise me that it wasn't too much, that there weren't problems, and that she would tell me immediately if those things happened so it could be addressed right off because I care enough to want that for her. When she made those promises, I thought they were worth something, that Mary would actually do what she promised. Even things like talking on the phone... in her "I'm throwing Shell away" email, she said she wanted to be able to choose whether or not to answer her phone. She doesn't tell you the OTHER side; the times I asked for that promise, it was times when Mary said she NEEDED a contract, and to tell her if I could make a stronger one. For some reason, if I got up the courage to do that, and couldn't get through, I ended up getting hurt so much worse. So when she asked for that - as she did almost EVERY conversation - I asked for the promise that if I did, she'd actually answer. To me, that IS reasonable, and if she felt otherwise it was HER responsibility to say something.
Even if she actually believes I knew those things, she should've cared enough to actually have a conversation. Instead she chose to hang up & throw me away. She used to say, "You are my BEST FRIEND, my SISTER, I could NEVER lose you, I will NEVER let go."
I believed her.
Mary lied.
And that is why she haunts me. I used to think the nightmares where she stabbed me in the heart over & over without me dying were the worst, even worse than the ones killing me.
I was wrong.
The worst nightmares are the ones when she SEES what she did & agrees to work it out the way she begged me to do so many times. Because in those "dreams" I actually get her back. I get to prove myself and both of us get to earn each other's trust back. I get to hug her, make her laugh, send her packages, act crazy during certain songs, and hold her when she's hurting. THAT is why it's a nightmare rather than a dream... I get all of those things back only to wake up.
She chose to let it control her. But she's punishing me for her mistakes and incredibly bad decisions.
Because of Mary I will be hurting in ways for the rest of my life that a miracle is the only way I can heal. Because of Mary EVERYONE in my life suffers - they pay for her mistakes too. Because of Mary, I wish my father still had me - HE IS BETTER than her in terms of being safer & being a better person (at least he TOLD ME when something was wrong & didn't hide from me).
And yet...
I want my best friend. I want my sister.
I miss her. I love her.
So much.
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| It hurts.Tonight I need your prayers desperately.
Yes, it's about Mary. Again. That's what happens when your best friend - the person who calls you their SISTER, even in their wedding - suddenly turns on you, with no warning, without ONE conversation, without even TRYING to fight to hold on. Mary promised so many things, and the ONLY part of the "shame on me a thousand times over" line she said about trusting me is true is that she IS a fool. She is a liar. She is a coward. She is cruel. She is heartless.
I don't understand how I was using her when I did more for her than her other friends in several areas. When I fought for a disease I don't have - LITERALLY traveling THOUSANDS of miles and raising THOUSANDS of dollars - and not a single other person in her life did any of those things a single time. When I paid for everything on her birthday & told her we could do anything she wanted that day if she would like to do that - and that's exactly what we did - and NONE of her other friends even asked if she had plans, let alone actually planned on doing anything for her birthday themselves. When I paid for a lot of things actually. When I spent HOURS learning about diabetes to get the best grip on what to know that someone without the disease can have. When I called her husband during her worst migraine to date just to give him pointers on how to help her, things to try, and at what point to worry. When I'd randomly leave things on her bed at school or in the mail for her to find - because I KNOW it was one of her main love languages & it meant a lot to her. When I FOUND OUT what time she had short breaks the day of her senior presentation just to check in on her, try to get her nerves calm, AND bringing a nice hot drink for her to sip on. When I was the one listening OVER & OVER to her senior presentation for her to practice AND for me to give her feedback. WHEN I GAVE HER A SET OF KEYS TO MY CAR, allowing her access at any time for free, including gas. (I mean, SERIOUSLY, who does that for someone they are using?) When I left her a card saying how proud of her I was with her favorite chocolates for her to find after her senior presentation? When I'd take her trash out when I was headed to throw my own out. When I went back to be with her after her grandfather died even though I almost DIED and I KNEW that was a risk when I decided to go back - because my SISTER said she needed me. When I was helping with her wedding invitations, including driving all over the place finding ribbon (several trips, lots of gas I paid for) and assembling them. When she was so stressed about homework & invitations that one day when she left for class I got every single one of those invitations sorted & ready to go.
(By the way, I am in NO WAY saying these things make me a better friend than anyone else. And I am in NO WAY saying that I minded doing these things AT ALL. In all honesty, I LOVED doing them!!! I loved doing anything I could to help Mary or express how much she means to me.)
Of course, those things aren't all that makes a good friend. Providing for tangible needs is one thing, but showing love & support unconditionally is a HUGE part of being a good friend. If Mary said she needed me, my focus was on her, absolutely, no matter if I was on the verge of killing myself or if I was busy. I could've been planning an attempt and STILL put something that serious in the back of my mind if Mary needed me because that's how important she was - and still is. I LOVED being able to tell Mary I believed in her. (Past tense.)
I KNOW I'm being critical on here. And I'm NOT saying it's right - I don't know what's right in many areas anymore. However, I DO know certain things are wrong, and Mary did lots of them. She says she did this after praying - either she was lying or it was NOT God answering, because GOD KNOWS THE TRUTH about me, what was going on, and whether or not I was being dishonest while Mary was ignoring me like a cruel & heartless monster. GOD KNOWS the truth - which is EXACTLY as I've been claiming. A true answer from God would've reflected that - and GOD DOES NOT LIE. Mary said there are times to make sacrifices for God - but in doing what she did, SHE TURNED PEOPLE FROM HIM. I've talked to SEVERAL people who said that they want to be the exact opposite of Mary after this, and that if this is someone who follows God, they want nothing to do with Him - not good in light of Mary's position especially.
If Mary wants to sacrifice for God, why not sacrifice the lies, broken promises, an unforgiving heart, and an unwillingness to get the whole picture before acting on false assumptions.
The thing is, I STILL CARE. If she showed up here right now, there would be stern words, most likely loud words, but BEFORE that would come a tight hug followed by looking her in the eyes and saying, "I love you. No matter what. And I am still here."
I never want Mary to hurt, but if this has hurt her, I don't feel sorry for her. She brought it on herself when she CHOSE to lie by promising things were fine when they weren't, CHOSE to break promises (I have them in her writing, so she's breaking them AND lying about it), CHOSE to go AGAINST GOD'S WORD in how to deal with conflict... heck, she didn't deal with it AT ALL, she chose to run from it without even talking to me. She told a friend of mine that she is done trying... you can't be done before you start.
Please pray for me. I need it so badly. I'm trying so very hard to overcome this...
...but I'm afraid that tonight I will lose 6.5 months and start the "Clean from Self-Injury" count back at 0 again.
*I love you so much, Mary. I will work through this with you if you let me. I will work through forgiveness and I will NEVER let go. I promised. You breaking your promises will not change that. If you ever need me, I am here.*
P.S. - If you could pray for my head, I would really appreciate that as well. My migraine got too bad too quickly for me to catch it in time. It hurts so much...
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| THEY PICKED THE OLYMPIC TEAM!!!!!!!!!And I was RIGHT!!! 
Tonight, the following 6 young women were named to the team that will represent the United States of America in artistic gymnastics at the Olympics next month in Beijing:
- Shawn Johnson
- Nastia Liukin
- Alicia Sacramone
- Chellsie Memmel
- Samantha Pezsek
- Bridget Sloan
The 3 young women who will be our alternates are:
- Jana Bieger
- Ivana Hong
- Corrie Lothrop
I gotta say, I am VERY disappointed that Jana wasn't named to the team. However, I wasn't really surprised, because at today's competition she missed the exact same skill she missed yesterday... and it was on Bars, our weakest event. Gymnastics-wise, I understand why she wasn't named to the team, but what REALLY surprised me that in her place was Bridget Sloan!
Don't get me wrong, Bridget is a talented gymnast - obviously. The thing about her is that she's been "alternate" or in a position that doesn't necessarily provide as much pressure as usual in international competition. She is NOT tested enough for the Olympic stage, in my opinion.
Case in point: Olympic Trials. I WAS THERE. And Bridget did NOT do well. In our minds, she was done by the end of the second night of Trials because if she couldn't compete at her best in that arena, in front of 13,000 fans (the Men's team called us their loudest crowd EVER - YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! ), on a podium, how can we expect her to do well at the Olympics? She has the skills... but the Olympics isn't the time to trust that she will be able to perform to the best of her ability in the highest-pressure situation she's ever been in.
I REALLY believe that if Shayla hadn't been injured, she would've made the team. She DOES have the international experience needed and her performances helped the U.S. team to a gold medal at Worlds last year. If it's between Shayla & Bridget, I'd say Shayla, hands down. But Shayla's leg is broken so she isn't an option anymore, unfortunately.
As far as alternates, I think Corrie's okay, although she doesn't have the experience the others do. I am VERY okay with Ivana being an alternate as opposed to making the actual team. She does GREAT gymnastics - IF it's not in a pressure situation. The Olympics are as much pressure as a gymnast can ever get in their athletic career. Honestly, I don't think we can count on Ivana should we need her as an alternate, but I guess we need SOMEONE with experience as an alternate for us to choose from should need be! 
I just read in an article that Marta Karolyi said her decision between Jana & Bridget was sad, but that it was about who would be "mentally tough." Okay, sorry, but Jana IS mentally tough and Bridget isn't tough enough!!!!!!! Seriously, this annoys & frustrates me. Yes, Jana fell off bars - two days in a row. Yes, bars is our weakness, so to have that happen is rather concerning. However, those 2 sets are the ONLY sets Jana has missed in FOREVER. Seriously. And she was 2nd All-Around at Worlds in 2006. Jana Bieger has the mental toughness and the physical ability to perform under pressure.
The thing that REALLY ticks me off is this: the Selection Committee (read: Marta Karolyi) used the CAMP to determine this!!!!!!!!!!!! HUGE difference between the camp with maybe 300 people TOTAL including staff, campers, and family, and an arena packed with screaming fans at a major competition. If THAT were the standard, why wasn't Ivana Hong named to the team? I'm not pulling for Ivana, I'm pulling for Jana... my point is simply that if you're going to use the camp as the basis, use it consistently.
Before I knew the standard Marta was using, I was okay with the selected team. Now that I know, I believe Jana deserves to be that 6th gymnast. There are a few words I'd like to use with the folks down in Texas right now, and they aren't pretty. ANYWAY... time to compose myself & move on. 
Well, there you have it, there's our Olympic team!!!!!!!!
I can't wait to see our girls compete in Beijing - we have such a solid team! Our guys are also very solid as well and I think we will see great performances from them. Just a few short weeks until the Olympics are here!!!!!!!!!
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| Who will they be???????If you follow gymnastics at all, you're probably wondering the same thing I am right about now:
Who will be on this Olympic team?????????????
When I went to the Olympic Trials, I made 2 rosters - one of the people I WANT on the team, the other of people who I PREDICT will be on the team. Today was Day 1 of the "second Trials" at the National Training Center in Texas. It was All-Around, meaning all 4 events; tomorrow each gymnast will perform on the 2 events of their choice. This was not televised, so I read through the "transcripts" of today's competition. This means my lists will be as updated as possible, with everything that's happened thus far taken into consideration. My "predictions" are really just educated guesses, and although I'm confident that 5 of the 6 I name will be chosen, that last one is still rather uncertain!
Okay, the biggest news of the day: Shayla Worley fractured her leg during warm-ups today!!!!!! She is no longer a candidate for the team. Obviously this is devastating for her... my mind is going back to how very hard she fought to do well at Trials after missing Nationals with a back injury. One of the "fluff" pieces from Trials features her saying that getting to go to the Olympics after the work of her family, friends, and coaches working her whole life to get to Beijing "would be amazing and incredible." My prayers are with Shayla tonight.
LIST #1: My Favorites for the Olympic Team!
- Alicia Sacramone
- Shawn Johnson
- Chellsie Memmel
- Nastia Liukin
- Jana Bieger
- Shayla -- she's out so next is Mattie Larson
The second list is MUCH more difficult - the "educated guesses" I was so sure of after being at Trials are now somewhat shaky after today's competition.
For those of you non-gymnasts out there, it is widely believed that only ONE spot is still open - Shawn Johnson & Nastia Liukin were named to the team at the Trials I went to, leaving 4 spots. Alicia Sacramone, Chellsie Memmel, and Samantha Peszek are widely considered to be "locks" for the team, leaving just 1 spot open.
HOWEVER, today Chellsie struggled!!! She felt something go wrong with her back after her second tumbling pass - and Floor was their first event! So she sat out Vault, then Bars, but performed - and performed very well - on Beam. Chellsie was the 2005 World Champion and saved the 2003 Worlds team, flying in as a second alternate and performing more routines than any other member, leading them to the first-EVER Team gold for the U.S.! Chellsie's experience is a HUGE asset to the team. However, Marta Karolyi will NOT take an injured gymnast. Chellsie's injured ankle in 2004 kept her off the last team, leaving her an alternate a year after she became a world champion! Chellsie rebounded today, but the big question is this: will the selection committee - Marta in particular - risk taking her when she's missed the past 2 years due to injuries and just after shocking everyone with this comeback she got hurt during the last chance she has to prove herself?
Note to you non-gymnasts: Marta Karolyi is in charge of the Olympic team. There are 2 other people on the Selection Committee but this is Marta's team. And Marta does NOT care AT ALL whether or not you deserve a spot based on being a favorite or being great at one point. Marta wants the best NOW, the people who will help the TEAM to a medal - it's all about the American TEAM, not about the girls as individuals.
ANYWAY, so Chellsie may not be the "lock" we all thought! However, she IS great on bars, and that's our biggest gap - so she isn't out yet. Shawn & Nastia are on the team, which is official now that they proved their readiness today. Alicia didn't have her BEST competition, but she is a HUGE asset to the team - she's been World Champion on floor and medaled at Worlds on vault, plus she's competed under pressure so many times and has handled it WONDERFULLY. Alicia is, in my opinion, a lock.
Then there's Samantha Peszek. The reason I'm not 100% sure she's a lock is that Ivana Hong AND Bridget Sloan made strong impressions tonight. However, Samantha has EXPERIENCE. Bridget was an alternate at Worlds and although she's competed internationally, she lacks the experience the other girls have. Ivana is good EXCEPT under pressure! Today she hit - but at Trials she didn't. And at Nationals last year she didn't. Ivana does wonderful gymnastics but CAVES UNDER PRESSURE. Today she competed under pressure, but it was in front of family & friends & 200 little girls. No podium. No arena. No crowd. And she makes the same mistakes over & over, so it's not just a random mistake here or there.
I still believe Sam will make the team - her experience is invaluable and although she may not place at the top of the podium all the time, she is consistent, and consistency under pressure is EXACTLY what our team needs.
Ivana, as I said, caves. After Trials, there was NO WAY I could've imagined her making the team because she caves too often. Even at the one Worlds she competed in, last year, yes she was on the team & they won, but she was the only gymnast on our team NOT to compete in Finals. If Ivana hadn't had a great competition today, I'd totally write her off! Marta may have been impressed, but frankly, she will not take a gymnast who can't handle the pressure. This is the OLYMPICS. Once every 4 years. And she won't take a gymnast who can only do well if no one's there and she's in a gym atmosphere rather than an arena atmosphere.
Bridget Sloan also didn't have a chance in my opinion. She doesn't have much international experience, and Trials did NOT go well for her!!! My mom & I sat in that arena and talked with the person next to us, and she agreed that Bridget didn't have a chance. She wasn't performing well under pressure and that's not acceptable if you're trying to make this team. Bridget fell apart on Day 2 of Trials... I'm not sure if they televised all of her routines or not, but it wasn't good. HOWEVER, Bridget unveiled a new vault today - she is now performing a Yurchenko double, and Marta was VERY impressed. So I'm not sure how to weigh that!!
If the choice for the 6th & final spot is between Ivana & Bridget, I think it'll be Bridget.
But then there's Jana.
Personally, I would LOVE to see Jana on this team. And Jana DOES have the skills & confidence to be a spectacular addition to the team!!! Jana was 2nd All-Around at Worlds in 2006... so she is obviously not only good in terms of difficulty but also in terms of performing well under some serious pressure!! However, Jana scored behind Ivana at both Nationals AND Trials. The ONLY reason I think Marta may overlook that is because there's a very good chance that Ivana won't be able to pull off those same scores under the kind of pressure she'll face at the Olympics.
The problem that EVERYONE seems to have with Jana is that she lacks polish. Flexed feet. (For non-gymnasts: she doesn't point her toes, which you're always supposed to do or they deduct for lack of artistry.) Marta told NBC commentator Elfi Schlegel that you can deduct from Jana's routines for lack of artistry, but that is IT. She is VERY CONSISTENT. So do you want to risk taking a couple tenths off in order to be certain you will have a solid score to work with? Tenths will decide the Olympics, but you take what you've got, and consistency is something I'd value above perfection. Ideally, you need both, but you won't always have that luxury.
So... if it's between Jana and Bridget, I seriously don't know who will be chosen! ESPECIALLY because today Jana fell on Bars. Usually a solid event for her. The reason this is alarming is that Bars is our weak point, our "Achilles heel" if you will. I want Jana. But does the Selection Committee?
Here is my second list - my list of educated guesses as to who the Olympic team will be. There will also be 3 ALTERNATES chosen... so whoever I was narrowing it down with will most likely be named as alternates if they don't make the actual team!!!!!!!!!!
LIST #2: My Educated Guesses for the Olympic Team!
- Shawn Johnson
- Nastia Liukin
- Alicia Sacramone
- Chellsie Memmel
- Samantha Peszek
- Bridget Sloan/Jana Bieger.... (if that's cheating, I'll guess Bridget... it's just so close! )
Kate is in Russia and therefore will not be adding to this discussion, but prior to leaving the country her guesses were about the same as mine. Bet you non-gymnasts didn't know such a long post could be written just to make a list of SIX people who will make up this Olympic team! And that it's really very complex!
And to my friends in the gymnastics world, feel free to share your "lists" with me! Leave a comment, message me, whatever - but you have to do it BEFORE 7pm EST as the team will be announced at 7:15pm!
I CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR WHO WILL MAKE UP TEAM USA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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