In Taiwan.

It feels good to be home again. Balled off my ass at the funeral. Just wish it was a different reason that brought me home this time.

HAPPY FOUR YEARS OLD NU.NATICS!

I am usually the first person that remembers our anniversary, but I totally forgot about Nu class four year anniversary this time. Can't believe four years have gone by. These girls mean so much to me and always will. 

Feel like writing, so here I am. Venting.

Guess what? This time I am actually not writing about love and relationships.

Received one of the worst news today. I was in shock. I knew the day was coming, but I just didn't know when or how it was going to come.

I never got to say goodbye. Who know, that was the last time I'd ever see grandma.

Some people might not have close relationships with their grandparents. But I am very close to my grandparents. Lived with mom's parents for 5 years and lived with dad's mom for 9.5 years. They've made such great impact in my life. The older the get, the more scared I get. I am so afriad of losing, especially losing the loved ones.

There are more to come...

This entry is to remind myself that I can be a bigger person.

What's the point of feeling down, hurt, and beating myself up over the past?

I am not going to do that to me anymore.

Everythings happen for a reason, as lame as it may sound and as much as we would like to deny, each experience we go through is a learning process. Yup, it still hurts, I am not a saint, but we both know that we did the right thing for both of us.

Truly hope we will be much closer as friends than we ever have been. You mean so much to me that I'll always care for you. And I don't ever want you to fall out of my life.

How come your close friends always seem to know when to say the funniest shiet when you are down?

I gave some dried mangos to Swee today. After I came back from lunch, I found this email from her: "I think those mangos make me want to da-bien (meaning taking a shit in Chinese)"

HAHAHAHAHA I realllllly needed that laugh =)

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This is definitely the very last time I'll write anything in regard to this situation.

The end. No mas. Complete closure.

Yes, I know I"ve said that line so many times before, but I know for sure I made the right decision and I am better off alone.

Nothing can erase all the hurtful things that have said and done. No turning back. Just me, myself, and I.

On a lighter note. It's already March. How come time is always flying? Oh yah, I don't particularly miss that person I was refering to in the last entry in that way anymore. Friendship goes a much longer way.

Got such a sweet message from J today. Yah, how've we all grown over the past N years...So much have changed.

2/27/07

I've switched to myspace!! Find me =)

Wish I could write our whole conversation down from last night. Always enjoy "girl talk" with Chrissy. We crack each other up!!!

No more depressing entries. Suddenly, I've been missing someone in a weird way. Maybe things could've happened long time ago but it's so long ago. Sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I only.........

Need to gain weight. I am a skeleton right now.

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Needed the change, so I chopped off nearly 10 inches of my long black hair and highlighted it. Pix will come soon.

Never knew it would affect me this much, but it is...Never knew I would be this hurt, but I am. Never thought you would be completely out of my life, but you are so gone.

The past year has meant so much to me. Sorry for draining and hurting you.

2.5 years and still counting. It's as if I've never recovered.

The scars remind me..that the past is real.

I tear my heart open..

just to feel.

My heart is dead and I don't want to feel again.