| so this is where my life is.recovered. i think.
for the most part.
feeling a bit better about my body.
at 130 pounds. need to lose 10 pounds.
and how are you?
|
| |
| can you still feel the butterflies?for me this is heaven. |
| |
| And you can have it all
My empire of dirt.
I will let you down.
I will make you hurt.
Clearly listening to too much Johnny Cash lately. Anyways, my weight has not changed no matter what i do. It's infuriating. I'm eating around 600 calories most days. Somedays more sometimes less. I'm not trying to restrict, i'm just not very hungry lately. And i want to lost at least 10 pounds. But no matter what i do, whether i try to lose weight the healthy way, the...unhealthy way or if i eat a ton my weight just does not change. it's infuriating.
I've been so moody lately. And it's not my period. I just feel messed up and like i'm annoying everyone. Oooooh Well. Just the usual complaints i guess.
Yesterday I ate a sandwhich[200 calories] 200 calories worth of chocolate and 150 calories worth of chicken.
Yesterday's total: 550 calories. |
| |
| i was looking at old pictures of me and they really motivated me because it made me realize how incredibly fat i am now. at about 139 right now cause i'm nearing my period.
toast.
1/2 cup soup.
1 cup of popcorn.
1/2 twix. [quentin wanted me to?]
1/2 cup bowtie pasta with sauce quentin made.
946 calories.
i guess that's not too horrible. but definitely not good. tommorow needs to be better.
my goal weight is now 120-130. i know that's a healthy weight and i am really trying to eat better. i just seem to forget to eat alot of the time.
so about 15 pounds to lose. let's do it. |
| |
| at 920 calories. had to force myself to eat at all today. i just don't have any urge to eat lately. and i've lost about 6 pounds in a week. but at least i'm telling myself i need to eat. i don't understand it, i'm happy, i'm not terribly stressed out. maybe it's just random. i felt very uncomfortable with my body though so maybe it just happened.
at about 137 pounds right now. ya i had gained quite a bit of weight before. now my goal weight is about 120-130 pounds. so about 10-15 pounds more to go. and at this rate it'll be gone very soon.
no one's even trying to stop me this time.
everyone thinks i'm cured.
ha. |
| |
