I deserve to be swept of my feet.

And yet I am still here.

I am sitting in my own dismay. I am trying to decipher what I should hold out for and what I should accept as enough. Words are funny little demons that make you believe and forget things that matter. Your words dance around me in the dark of the nightlight as I am stunned by things I have never heard, and for a moment one night I believed. However, I have felt the sting of  insignificance...and I feel it all too much with you.  -As I watch the tattered pictures of that before me still waving in the wind for all to see. I have given up on the feelings I had...I have been drifting along for quite some time now... and what keeps me here? -Not the fear of abandonement. I have been alone. I am alone. -Not the fear of losing something tremendous... I haven't had tremendous. -Not the fear of a gaping wound. I am wounded daily.  What is it? Where am I that I cannot pursue the unraveling that is necessary? Is it because for some reason you seem to believe all is well? Is it that I see hope in your face and want to believe it as my own hope? You haven't looked at me, for if you had you would have noticed I am not here. I am gone...and you haven't even tried to get me back.

Currently Watching Meet Joe Black see related

Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived.

-A qoute that I like to read from time to time...

Currently Listening Darin at the Copa By Bobby Darin see related

Somewhere beyond the You

It has come to pass in my life that what I offer hasn’t been seen as precious until it is no longer deemed wholly yours. I am speaking on a much larger plane than just your self specifically, of course. However, just the same I am in the same boat –so to speak- as I have ever been. I feel it. I hear it in the way you look at me. I am that person. I am brilliance shaded. My brilliance does not show at you like a beckoning quandary. My brilliance slowly shows a tea light glow. It shimmers and it shines off the capsule of your soul. You don’t see it easily, and it is nothing to show others.  However, you have come into my life time and time again. I have fought with you to prove to you that I am a light to be beheld. I am a light that illuminates your face. You leave when you see the thing that you are searching for –even if it not within your reach. And yet, I beguile you with my essence. You never leave me. You have become accustomed to my warmth. And the truth is my warmth for you will never fade. However you are still here. -All of you –you still call on me to give to you.  My insolate neighbor, you have lost me forever. I will show my brilliance to another… and you will still call.