I'll be there for you
but only when it works for me

Well...looks like I have nothing to say to you.

You're so vain--
I bet you think this song is about you
don't you?

EDIT'D!!!!!!!!!!!

CARLEY IF YOU DON'T FUCKING CHANGE MY PICTURE RIGHT NOW IM GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!!!! DON'T TEMPT ME, YOU KNOW IM DYING TO PICK A FIGHT WITH YOUR BITCH ASS!!! YA WHORE!!!!!!!

END EDIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EDIT AGAIN'D!!!!!!!!

I'LL CHANGE THE FUCKING PICTURE! I'M ON BRYANNA'S COMPUTER!! BUT YOU'RE STILL A BITCH!!!   :D

AGAIN ITS OVER!!!!!!!!!!

FUCK IT!

New xanga, dammit! an_octave_higher

-OVER

Okay, I'm single. I'm also hot. Call me. ;)

So, you all expected me to just be crushed, didn't you? You all thought finding out she wasn't what I thought she was would destroy me. And it did hurt, but you know what? I'm glad.

I'm glad, because she's an awesome friend, but she's terrible at relationships. Maybe she'll value me for the right reasons now that we're friends.

And now I know for certain there's more for me out there. Much more than she could give me. Sounds cruel, but its the God honest truth. Someday, someone'll come along who'll appreciate the same things I do. Who'll appreciate me because I'm intelligent and funny and random and clumsy and cute and I crinkle my nose when I laugh and because I'm deep and I'm poetic and I love to make things up and not just because I'm there.

I'm fine. :) If you lose touch, I'll kick your asses.

So I was at a party last night. Um...I won't post all the details here, but its pretty funny...call me if you want to know just what I did---I'll tell you what I can remember and you'll have to get the rest from someone else.

Saw me a little bit o' action, too ;) Not quite as much as I'd have liked, but that Evan's a cutie. Mmm-mmm. Only thing was, he's a whore. Oh well, I was too, last night. ;P Don't tell anyone.

So now I'm at Bryanna's on her computer but I had to sign on as Carley as a guest because I couldnt actually find Bryanna to get her password?

I lost 11 pounds in 4 days. Woo!!!!

Grades = not doing well. trying to bring them up.

Decided what I'm looking like at prom. It'll be hot.

Um....that's all for now. Comment me and call me you sons of bitches, or die.

<3

Proof of the imperfections in human nature: lies

Well, it's been a while, hasn't it?

I really like this new layout. Thank you, Carley, darling.

=D

As for life lately...

I'm at my mom's house right now. Me and my sister were watching the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. I'm still listening to it in the next room. This may sound corny, but I've found something I relate with in all four of the characters. Lena is shy and unsure of herself until she meets someone who brings out the best in her, even though it means risking everything she's ever known to be with him. Bridget....well I don't really identify with Bridget that much, but Tibby is a rebellious spirit who feels like her life is going nowhere and she can't figure it out, and I find myself feeling that way alot. Then there's Carmen. The fat one. The one who's having self-love issues as well as issues with her family.

Back to my own life.

Lately I see alot less of Carley and this makes me ...well, sad, to be generic about it. I was very worried about our relationship until she said something last night that really made me realize how much she does love me. I dunno, maybe I only half-believed it before. I guess that happens when you have trouble believing that you love yourself. But with me, that's only half the time. The time I do get to spend with my darling dear girl is....

that time is....

well, there aren't words for it. But if there were words for it, they'd be pretty words.

Home life. Things are...bearable. My father is the most horrid man on the planet sometimes. He cares only about himself. He couldn't care less how sick I am if he thinks there's any risk of him not being in control. Living with my grammy has its ups and downs. She leaves me alone and she's glad I'm there at night, but she keeps trying to shove food down my throat when I'm not hungry and sometimes she gets on my nerves. I know she can't help it, she's 80 years old, but it's just not like having a family life. I'm actually at Mom's right now, but I feel more like a guest than anything.

At least my sister is happy to see me.

And I've been trying to look on the bright side of things. So I'll say this. It has been hard to realize that most of my real friendships have faded. I'm just not as po[pular as I used to be. But I do have the best best friend in the world. Having Jessica around is great because its a laugh a minute, even when both our hearts are breaking, breaking, broken and all our will to fight is going, going, gone. Together, we've somehow figured out how to make something sparkly of nothing at all.

And as for Carley, she's something. Not just something, she's everything. She's somehow helped me realize that life is truly up to the liver, even if she somethimes doesn't believe it herself. She's something I'm going to keep. She's....she's the best. She keeps me going.

And to you, baby, thanks for being the part of my heart that never breaks.

So, to all you out in nowhereland who actually read this post, call me sometime. Let's hang out. I miss you. I'd love to catch up.

With that, I'm out.

Feel the rain on your skin  
((no one else can feel it for you, only you can let it in))

edit brought to you'd sort of by kellie

She's right. It's bad. It's gonna get worse. The ones who see you through it are the ones you wanna keep. You've all got my number. <3

edit again

and Carley...yes, I want a new profile picture. ..Please.

So.   So.

When there's far too much to say, just say nothing at all.

-You're my night sky-

heeeeey!   Who likes the new layout?

Thank you my lovely ^^

Haven't been doing much...Bryanna locked me out of the house and I spent a fraking hour on the porch in the freezing cold yesterday....:*(

Still can't get Carley's sims to cooperate :*(

lips chapped :*(

But I do have the best grl in the world =D

I can't wait til Christmas!!!!!

Anyways, so I've been having these horrible nightmares every night, right? Well, last night, they went away. I also happened to be with Carey last night. Coincidence? Hmm dunno...

Right. Leave me comments. Bye.