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tempestfair089
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Name: Lindsey :)
Country: United States
State: Louisiana
Metro: Shreveport
Birthday: 4/26/1989
Gender: Female
Interests: MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, pistacio almond ice-cream, talks that end up somewhere, my scriptures, midnight jogs, washing my face, Mr. Fat Cat, decorating my room, photography, the name Jane (I've always wished it was my name, lol) puffins that waddle, sugar-coated anything, italian food, turquoise, stories with a twist, big rocks to climb over, catching a sunrise, bleating goats (haha they are so cute), EFY's and Girls Camps' and YC's, the mountains and sea, laughing endlessly, TLC, chicken-noodle soup, soft sheets, classic movies, yummy mounds bars, roadtrips, independence, softball, the Gap, oh heck..geting soaked in the RAIN!..modern appliances, o my...THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA , traveling, learning from others, shopping for all sorts of holidays, smiling, painting (my landscape is not so bad), spreading the gospel in ways I can, laying out in the sun, BYU, dancing, temples anywhere, chapstick, knowing what to say...
Expertise: EATING CHEESECAKE!
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
6/25/2004
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| "This is how I got my Wings"
The flood had gone; there we were-
washed up on that shore,
where the sand was rough
and the air was stifling.
I had tasted drowning as sweet
so I drank it in with glee;
my lungs shook and my heart pulsed
as I nearly choked on our love.
Perhaps, you say, we were too thirsty
for risks and brave lies.
Once our vessel full of promises
seemed near and safe;
It had sailed on in other worlds
and forgot us in the sea.
We stood waiting on the edge
but knew none could rescue.
The water ahead sparkled in your eyes,
darling, yet you stared.
And what stare had replaced your gaze?
What change of temperature made your
muscles tense up with fear?
You wore that smirk in many shades;
I still believe the darker fit you best.
Coming fast was a narrow path
Able to take us miles away from grief.
"Let it renew our vows and pave the way
to a special place in the sky."
Hope was shining brightly on my face
but you had already decided..
To stay stationed at solitude
thinking you were destined instead,
and there was no way of telling
where your pain would take me.
I could not wait for a second chance
so heaven let me soar.
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| Whoa now. I haven't been on xanga since June to this day. The 22nd... today would have been a day for celebrating. And in a way- maybe I am. Maybe I am rejoicing inside for my heart's dread. A process is what it is. And I've gone through it once before. Now again, but I'm stronger. Lovelier, a bit. Weaker, too.. afraid some. A process... and this is Stage 1. A dead anniversary today, a new year's resolution later.
So I don't think that anyone uses xanga anymore, and nobody in the world will think to read mine after all this time. BUT I did write my best poems on here once upon a time, and I need my place back. Facebook is all silliness, though it's great for everything else. Journal-keeping is pretty much out of the question since I threw mine away..so xanga, old friend, I'll take my many thoughts and retreat into your endless entries.
Here's something I've been wanting to get out all week.
By Grace I caught this sweet bud
and cupped It in my hands.
A fragrance of three seasons,
but Autumn's scent was gone.
I cherished Its petals with a kiss
and grew Its stem in a glass vase-
safe in my window with air trapped inside.
My Treasure felt exposure to sunny days,
and protection from a bitter fall of rain.
Still by Fall the wind stole into the garden
and carried My Love away..
The pieces of its shattered vase
strewn all over my floor,
sing happiness to my blood.
There is such a thing as release;
it gives me room for tears.
But no such thing as strength
without release.
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| hm. xanga is old. let's face it..only 2% of the xanga population is still actively updating. get a facebook! hehe.
but not myspace. that would be stupid.
today is my 5 month anniversary to the day i met taylor! we're still solid and i have never been happier. :D i really do love him... and i'm ready for whole world to know.
i think i'm done with xanga... in the beginning it was a retreat for my feelings. but now those are so complicated and deep that its impossible for me to put them into words..especially here. i also posted my poems on xanga for commentary. everyone loved them etc. and thankyou for all of your lovely compliments. but i have a book now that i write all my poems in and i find it more personal when i am my only critique. last of all, xanga was a way to comunicate with my friends that i hardly saw. but its so much more fun to just BE with those people instead of pretending that i care about how their day went. ever since i dated taylor i've realized that i love being with people. devoting a whole day or week just to them and actually talking and catching up or whatever... that's how you get close to someone. that's how you learn to care. :)
i suppose i'll end with one last poem.
“The Storm”
Thunder roared along with her moans and cries
As she cast her blue eyes to the sleepy rain.
A terrible war in the darkened skies,
Yet the world turned still the same.
The sky could see everything and nothing,
Like her pulse tightened to a slower rhythm.
Her soul belonged to the heavens as a plaything-
Beyond saving, already broken without him.
She missed his lips on hers and that brown-eyed stare,
The soothing sound of his voice through the clouds…
All that was missing was his presence there,
If only distance alone could seal their vows.
The trees bent low to the dying earth,
And flowers withered under fallen debris.
The moon and stars knew not their worth,
When they could glance beyond to eternity.
The sound of destruction made her tremble,
But the true damage lay strewn in her heart.
Foundations all around began to crumble,
While she stood, her prayers setting her apart..
She waited for the storm’s weakness to arrive,
As the lightening made visible her laughing smile.
It told everyone else that she was still alive,
So it lingered on her lips for just a while.
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| wow, things have been busy. the last few days of my junior year are approaching ever so slowly..but wait! oh..i can see a light.. hehe..and what a dark tunnel this is... i never thought i'd make it through this far..
it really has a been a tough year. every part of me has been tried over and over. i am really hoping to pull all A's and B's on the last report card..but who's to say i won't screw it up. hm. well i don't really care..im sick of school and the summer is calling for me. goodbye junior class! i've had enough! lol.
for anyone who's interested taylor and i have been dating now for 4 months. it seems much longer than that, though.. he is a wonderful part of my life and i hope all of you that haven't met him yet will want to. but wow is he great...i've never felt this kind of happiness. :)
that's pretty much it. my life in a nutshell. there's a formal prom-like dance tonight at the stake center. i'm really excited! it'll be much better than school prom i'm sure...
well i love you all. have a great day!
lindseybojane | | |
| i was just thinking..time is flying by pretty fast. so much has changed and i want to keep up with it ALL. i still want to find pleasure in reading stories to my little sister and jumping on the trampoline with the sprinklers on underneath, and i hope that macaroni and hot dogs never get old...some old people don't like eating that kind of stuff but i want it to eat for the rest of my life. :D i know those are dumb things but seriously, i don't want anything to get old. including myself, but that can't be helped so..it's okay if i get all wrinkly and gray-haired, just as long as most of the things i love about my world stay the same.
summer makes me all giddy and hyper and chipper. :) i loooooove days like this. everythings perfect. oh and summer also makes me want to clean. like clean the war, wash the car, clean the house, or the neighbor's house, or mow a lawn- just anything that makes something messy look more fresh and organized. hm, its a good feeling.
today the cars around me drove in slow motion and everything just kind of...held its breathe. it was an odd 3 minutes, as i sat there in my pollen-covered corolla and blinked up at the setting sun. when i say the cars were in slow-motion i mean it in the way hardest to describe and just as i said it. does anyone else ever get that sensation? when for a few minutes things just slow down and all the noise is muffled and you think your ears and eyes are playing games..but this was pretty phenomenal..even if it was another mind trick out of the bag of symptoms bordering insanity.
some might now come to the conclusion that i can't write about anything important. well that's mostly true..my mind is blank and my thoughts are subtle..but if i ever let myself write about things that matter, i could sink into a dreadful hole of depression and anxiety. so on that happy note: everyone enjoy the simplicity of life. the simpleness may not matter but that's all the more reason to embrace it.
i love YOU
lindsey | | |
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