This officially marks my retirenment from Xanga. I am done using this site to rant about the little things in life, and am going to end posting.

Good bye all, it's been fun. If anyone can find me peppermint condoms, I am still looking for them.

Oh yeah, I HATE VALENTINES DAY. IT SUCKS.

It's much more fun to be a jackass than politically correct.

Try it some time. You'll like it.

I cannot stand the girls. Or I guess it isn't really girls, it's the inability of girls and guys to communicate. It's so damned pathetic. Girls never tell you exactly what they want, it's all this hidden code that stands for something. It really is. How many times have you ever heard "Oh, I understand that we each have our friends and I won't try and keep you from them" right before the psycho starts controlling your life? And guys are just as bad. "You're going to a club with your girlfriends? Alright" (four hours pass by) "WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN? YOU'VE BEEN AT A CLUB!?!?!?! *insert longer outbreak of jealousy here* WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE ME? I'M YOUR BOYFRIEND AND I..." let's just stop there. That's assuming that the two of them can communicate enough to be a couple in the first place.

Here's how most attempts of asking someone out go.

B: Hey Suzy... I was wondering if Sunday you weren't busy and ... uhh... we could like... go to church... or I mean lunch after church.. or... oh shit, you're an atheist.

G: No, that's ok... I watch .... football every day after church... yeah... football. That's on Sundays.

B: Maybe some other time?

G: *tentatively* Sure... (while thinking "fuck no")

Damn people for not being completely honest. It's so sad. I'm including a translation list so people know what in the fuck is going on.

Here's the one for what guys say:

Hey - Ok, this one actually is the same, generally it's used to grab your attention

What do you do in your spare time? - Is there any time for the two of us to go on a date (note that if a guy asks another guy, it's probably a bit different)

How was your weekend - I'm bored and trying to find something interesting to talk to in the hopes that you will eventually like me and want to go out with me

I don't want to have sex until marriage - I'm a dirty, rotten liar and the only reason I said that is in hopes that you will go out with me in which case I will break that promise 6 months from now.

Yeah so... you look good today - You're hot... or at least marginally good looking.

Thanks (tentatively) - I'm not really sure what to say, but it sounded like you were trying to compliment me, so I'm just going to play along.

Now for the list about girls

That guy is so hot - Either a) he's insanely hot or b) hahahaha... now I'm just trying to piss you off.

You're cute - I want you so badly it's not even funny

I like your _____ - I'm saying something nice in order to completely confuse you

(any physical contact that seems compassionate) - Are you confused as to whether I want you or not yet?

Let's just be friends - YOU and ME? AHAHAHA... what the fuck are you smoking? (Ok, maybe that's not all true, but there are some times where it could be)

You're too good for me - I'm a lying ho, if you were really as good as I say you are, I'd be all over you.

I think I'm done with these for a while. Have fun with them. And remember, everyone of the opposite sex is a lying bastard/bitch. So that probably means that somewhere in there, you are a lying bastard/bitch.

That comment was posted on NotMyPresident's page. Since it wouldn't have been around long if I posted it there, I'm going to post it here.

So, since the KKK are christian, they're good? And Hitler? And all of the South American dictators? Just because you're Christian doesn't mean shit. In fact, in my mind, if you're that much of a retard to follow it blindly, then you should be sent to your own "hell". As for Bush going to heaven? If he does, I'll be glad, because I'll go to your hell PROUDLY... got that jackass? PROUDLY! Just as long as you and Bush aren't there.

Since you're such an expert on proper spelling and grammar, let's dissect your comment and fix all of your errors. Each error will be marked by brackets ([])

This is obviously a website published by an uneducated child who also[,] obviously[repetetive][,] cannot spell ([There is a] lack of proper grammar and spelling[really? I didn't know I was retarded and needed to read it twice in a row])[now really, if he/she is such a good speller or is so good at grammar, why are there all of these corrections?] and [a] lack of knowledge [about (was "of")] politics. Not to mention how sad it is for someone like yourself, whoever you are, to obviously[this is time number 3 in 2 sentences] not realize how great [of] a person President Bush is[,] seeing [as] how he is a Christian[I personally think that "jackass" is better, but that's not what was written]. [It] [l]ooks like when the end times come, you won't have to see him anymore because he'll be in [H]eaven.

My grade on your grammar:

F

Here are some tips:

1) Increase your vocabulary. If you can't, use a thesaurus to avoid the painful learning process, it would fall right into the character that you have already established for yourself.

2) Work on your grammar. I'm sure you can use www.google.com to help you find all of the grammar rules.

3) Work on your spelling. If this is also too hard for you, open something with a spellcheck (i.e. Microsoft Word) to help you spell correctly.

4) This one is most important. I'll write it extra big for you.

SHUT UP

"It's always better to keep your mouth shut and have everyone think you're stupid, than to open your mouth and proove it"

Enough said there, wouldn't you all agree?

Some of you have commented that it isn't nice to say this to him. Maybe you're right, if you are, I don't care. The fact that they lectured people on their spelling and grammar when theirs isn't perfect was rather annoying.

I feel like a new post....

Cynicism kicks ass. No one has any idea how fun it is to know everything and make people feel stupid because you are smarter than they are.

Like this whole religion thing. People sit there and pray to a book that is thousands of years old. They live their life to that. I find it funny.

Just be cynical of everything. It works out much better.

And you know what's really stupid? Little bastards that throw eggs at people. Eggs are for EATING you dipshits. Nothing like standing on the sidewalk when an egg comes flying from nowhere and pelts you RIGHT IN THE HEAD. I'm sorry, but maybe I'm the only one that doesn't enjoy egg yolk in my ear. Not only that, people complain because it's a buisiness's fault that some dipshit was throwing eggs. If you want my opinion, it's the dipshit's fault. Why blame the buisiness when you can blame the person that actually THREW the eggs? Damn parents... raise your kids decently.