thejourneyislongbutworthit's Xanga

Whisper

Wed, 07 May 2008 02:33:32 GMT

I wrote this in 9th grade, Oct. 24, 2000.

In the night,
When all is done,
You're the one I want.
If I whisper your name
Will you bow down in shame
Or hold me close in your arms?
Will you be afraid to walk
And parade me as your girlfriend
Or shall you hide me
Whenever she walks by?
You know she doesn't love you.
You know she doesn't care,
But you go back to her.
I'll be waiting for you in the dark.
If there's even a spark
Just whisper.

Point- Affairs are bad, but if someone is truely in love, they'll wait for their love. Through good or bad times, they'll wait.

Life

Wed, 07 May 2008 02:28:56 GMT

I wrote this in 9th grade, Aug. 24, 2000.

I try to find the feelings
Hidden in my heart.
Yet all the people in the world
Couldn't tear us apart.

Life may come and
Life may go.
Our fate I do not,
Will not know.

I may marry someone else,
I may carry someone else.
I may take out my brain
And lie it on the shelf.

All I know is if my heart is still intact,
I will have your back.

My heart will go on
And love you for life.
Just maybe one day
I'll be your wife.

Remember: Life is not going to follow your every plan. You will have to fix the path if you've been hit by a major disaster.

Two of Hearts

Wed, 07 May 2008 02:23:09 GMT

I wrote this is 9th grade, Feb. 10, 2001 and finished it in 10th grade, Oct. 8, 2001.

Two hearts on the verge of love.
Two sparrows and a dove.
Two roses wilting away,
Only having but one day.
Two trees in the sunlight.
I'm looking at you with all my might.
I love you with all my heart
Nothing could tear us apart.

Anything that I thought I could do
Would never hurt me nor you.
It hasn't been long
That we cried together.
I was stupid
And I kissed him.
Now we're not
Not even friends.
I'm sadder than you'll ever be
Because I thought our story
Would end happily.

Thoughts: love, cheat, sad, heartbreak

A few things

Wed, 07 May 2008 02:17:48 GMT

For one, it is imposible to keep up with everything. I have to keep telling myself that. As myspace has became dead and my friends aren't really posting bulletins or messaging me anymore, I came to Xanga. I try to keep up with everyone's blogs, but it's almost impossible. I have like 6 friends and in one day, there is over a page in blogs. Come on people, most of your lives aren't that interesting. Granted I do like reading what you have to say, but not when you've got like 10 posts with one and two line phrases. How can that many people comment on something like that?

Also, school is nearing an end for the semester. I am not taking classes in the summer, so I am waiting till next fall. Kinda bummed though because I wanted to take 5 classes and they will only let me take 4. So, I am trying to finish all that up. My English class is good and finished although I don't know what I got. My Geography and Math classes are waiting for me to complete the final. Then I got 2 classes that I will be finished with by Monday.

My three kids got to play outside today. It was beautiful weather. BTW my oldest son is actually my step son and he is 4. My oldest daughter is my step daughter and she is 2. My other daughter is mine and she is 2. Yes, we have full custody. Their mother is worthless and calls maybe 2 times a year. Anyway, my kids are wearing me out. They are getting more and more wired since its pretty much summer and they can play in the yard.

My house needs clean. I am struggling to clean it, but it is hard with online classes, kids, and walking with my friend. Oh yeah, and my daughter is potty training. There is so much laundry and everything. Luckily, my son wants to clean so he's going to be helping me out this week. Since lord knows my husband hardly lifts a finger on the house.

I am walking now with my friend who lives nearby. We started walking on Sunday and we walked a half of a mile. Then today and yesterday we walked 3/4 of a mile. We were going to continue at that pace until Monday. However, we have decided to add a lap every 2 days. So tomorrow and Thursday we will be walking a full mile each day. I'll let you know how things go.

Death

Sun, 04 May 2008 14:22:07 GMT

I wrote this in 9th grade, January 28, 2001.

Life is here and death may come
To one unsuspecting one.
For death comes slow to those who wait.
Why is it such an undesirable fate?
I'd take my life faster than that
But suicide is the devil's trap.
Suicide is a sin.
It is a crime for which I do not want to be mine.
So I'll live my life with all my hate
And wait for my inevitable fate.
I'll live my life with a bore.
Until I am no more.

Point- Do not kill yourself. It will confuse and ruin everyone's life who cares about you. Wait life out with boredom if you wish. If you need help, get it.

The Former Me

Sun, 04 May 2008 14:13:46 GMT

I wrote this in 9th grade, January 27, 2001.

My eyes were soft and green
In which you could not have seen.
For now my eyes black as night
Grow from the endless spite.
I was hated and despised.
All I heard was lies.
As people said I was sweet
I knew they wanted me to worship
At their feet.
Life was painful so I killed myself
With the knife that was lying
On the shelf.

I lie here in this cold, wet ground.
No longer shall I be found.
My skin is clammy.
My heart is no more
For you killed me with that endless void.
Between you and I,
The secret lies.
You killed me on that night
When we got into that fight.
Does she know why you're now her guy?

Thoughts: death, cheat, heartache, pain

Loving You

Sat, 03 May 2008 23:18:48 GMT

I wrote this in 8th grade, June 21, 2000.

When I look into your eyes,
Love overcomes me.
When I hear your voice,
It's breathtaking.
When I kiss your lips,
I'm powerless against you.
And yet I never see you.
I guess it's the thought that counts.
If I truly look into your eyes,
I'll shake at the knees.
If I hear your voice,
I'll try to speak without words.
If I kiss your lips I shall follow your every move.
Why is the thought of you so overwhelming
And I'm powerless to stop it?

Thoughts: Love...

Crying

Sat, 03 May 2008 23:14:43 GMT

I read everyone's blogs and commented as I saw fit. Thanks for the entertainment.

I wrote this in 8th grade, June 21, 2000.

I'm crying.
I don't know why.
What's so sorrowful that
I have to break down in my head?

I don't know how.
How did I go from perky to gloomy
In a matter of seconds?

I don't know what.
What made me shade my barrier?

I don't know when.
When did I start and when will I finish?

I don't know where.
Where did I start showing my emotions?

I guess that makes me sound clueless,
But I do know something.
I know I want to see you.
You could end my tears in a minute
And make my grey skies blue.

Point- Emotional times can be hard, but soulmates can get you through anything.

A little happier now

Sat, 03 May 2008 01:28:14 GMT

So, I decided that I'm going to lose 100 lbs. in about 75 days. I know everyone is saying its ridiculous not only because of the time frame but because of my body structure. I don't think I've ever been under 180 since elementary school. Hell, I'll be happy if I'm back to that. I'm gonna tryto exercise, eat healthy, and walk walk walk.

My dad called me today cuz he heard bout the tornados that were near. I told him we were ok. He told me that he'll be bringing me a van around the first of next month. I can't wait for him to see where I live and meet my husband and kids and everything. I had a good discussion with my dad including politics which I don't talk to anyone bout.

Anyway, I'm gonna take a break on the poems while I'll keep everyone updated on whats up and I'll be reviewing previous posts from all of you and commenting.

Tootles,

Abilities

Thu, 01 May 2008 01:47:41 GMT

I wrote this in 8th grade, March 3, 2000.

If I were a fish,
I'd swim to the depths of the ocean.
But I'm not,
I'm a human.

If I were a bird,
I'd fly to the peak of the highest building.
But I'm not,
I'm a human.

If I were a cat,
I wouldn't have a care in the world.
But I'm not,
I'm a human.

If I were a rooster,
I'd make it my job to wake the sun.
But I'm not,
I'm a human.

If I were a horse,
I'd run like the wind.
But I'm not,
I'm a human.

If I were an animal,
I'd make it my life's goal to put my abilities to the limit.
I am.
So why can't I?

Passage- Did you ever wonder what it would be like to be something else? I have. I thought about being an animal. Then, I realized we are sort of like animals. We love and live and if we find something we like, we are loyal to it. Take time to realize your wild side.