Win? Lose? Draw?

The Reluctant Singer	A Traveler's Thoughts

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Posted by: thereluctantsinger Original: 4/7/2006 8:24 PM Comments: 6 eProps: 12 Read Comments Post a Comment Back to Your Xanga Site

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2 eProps from: PFCSteve BlueEyedTalaidh Divine_Devotion AskTheGodQuestion SkyMarshalOz Building_A_Mystery

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Friday, April 07, 2006

I've noticed that debates on xanga sometimes tend to get out of hand. I think that it's because it's hard not to respond to a response to one of our posts or to a response to a response. I respond to you; you respond to my response; I respond back; you .... And so it goes. Discussion often turns into a thing where everyone wants to have the last word.

Maybe what we need on xanga is a debate moderator. Since that isn't available, the next best think might be to limit ourselves to two responses. That way, the one who posts the original item will always get the last word on his or her own site. It would go something like this:

1. You make a post
2. I comment on your post
3. You comment on my comment
4. I make a 2nd comment on your comment
5. You respond to my 2nd commend

At this point, all debate is cut off. Any further comment my me would be ignored and deleted by you. And if I made the post, the reverse would be true. Maybe that would help curtail the ruffled feathers.

Does anyone have another idea regarding how to handle these little wars?

Posted 4/7/2006 8:24 PM - 6 comments

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6 Comments

I like long running arguments. But that's just me. If eventually the debate has nothing to do what it started out as, it's a good discussion. Eventually it stops being about the exact issue and becomes much bigger. And that's how you really find out about people. As Bruce Lee said, "I learn about myself and my peace only in conflict with others."

Posted 4/7/2006 9:29 PM by PFCSteve - reply

I guess I've never really run across too many "wars". Mainly just friendly conversations going back and forth. I suppose we could all use our little updated profile "chatboards" instead of comments. :)

Posted 4/7/2006 9:36 PM by BlueEyedTalaidh

- reply

I don't get into debates on here, I guess thats why I have never been a party to any of the wars. Hope your night is great.

Donna

Posted 4/7/2006 9:43 PM by Divine_Devotion

- reply

As I see it, it is not the volume of comments that is the problem but the arrogance and at times the disrespectful tone of those commenting. I remember once having a discussion with mr_jargon on jlee22's site that went on for at least 10 iterations. It was a very fruitful discussion, however, and it would have been a shame to cut it short. Since mr_jargon and I both treated one another's ideas respectfully (in spite of our disagreement) the conversation did not deteriorate.

That being said, there often comes a point in a debate / conversation where nothing new is being said. At such times, it is a good idea to "agree to disagree" and move on.

That's my two cents - Jim

Posted 4/8/2006 12:54 AM by AskTheGodQuestion - reply

I think that would be ridiculous to enforce. Many of my most interesting arguments take many more posts to find out what the person is actually saying and believes. To cut it short would be to end a most beneficial disagreement. I get to learn about the person and learn about different ways. It is most enlightening. I would think that as long as the argument is without malice or vindicativeness than it is worth contuing to its natural conclusion.

RYC: I will give you one of my most troubling contradictions when I have thought about it for a while. I want to find one that I would really like an answer for. Mind you that most I have found answers for but they were ridiculous, insufficient, or unsupportable.

Posted 4/8/2006 1:20 AM by SkyMarshalOz - reply