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theycallmesoupy
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Name: Janet
Country: United States
State: Texas
Metro: Katy
Birthday: 9/29/1984
Gender: Female
Interests: Watching insane (and unhealthy) amounts of television, listening to all different kinds of music (mostly rock, and all variations of it), reading MAGAZINES (fuck you, I have ADD), spending hours on this damn computer, working at Cracker Barrel ... PSYCH!
Expertise: All things trivial. I know an awful lot about absolutely nothing of importance.
Occupation: Other
Industry: Other
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  crack like dis
MSN: i_guess_its_okay@hotmail.com
Yahoo:  janetk84
Member Since:
1/20/2005
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| Life is so stinky right now.
There's something very wrong with my body and I don't know what it is yet. | | |
| BRITSOCCERDUDE TAKES IT UP THE ASS. | | |
| I know I said that I was done with xanga, but I'm only posting this here because this is the one place that she won't read.
I was hurt last night, beyond measure, by someone whom I loved, and someone whom I thought loved me; someone whom I once considered to be one of my very closest and oldest friends. She said things to me that I'll probably never forget (just like I've never forgotten how she told me, without anger, that she didn't want to be friends anymore when I was going through a really rough patch and I dropped out of high school -- some friend, huh?). Even though we've "made up" since, I'm still incredibly angry with and hurt by her and I still can't think about what she said without crying.
It really sucks when you can't trust someone anymore. I mean, it REALLY sucks. It also sucks when you have so much on your plate, and someone that you trusted and you thought really loved and appreciated you, tries to throw your own problems and insecurities back in your face.
I wanted to tell her so many things while she was criticizing me, but I couldn't. I'm so above that -- I would never say those things to someone, let alone a FRIEND. This girl is so lost, so out-of-touch with reality, and so concerned with all the wrong things in life that she can't even see past the nose on her face.
I think what I resent most is the fact that she tried to tell me that I hadn't changed at all since I was a (very unbalanced and debilitated) child. That made me so angry. Here I am, doing more than anyone -- even my own family -- ever thought I could do! I'm in school, I'm doing WELL in school, and I'm starting to get a new lease on life as someone with severe depression. I never thought I'd be able to learn how to cope, but I am learning. No one besides my mother seems to understand how much I've grown, and how much I've had to overcome, to get where I am at this very moment. I might not be the most successful or productive 21-year-old, but dammit, I'm doing pretty well, all things considered.
It really sucks that, within the space of two hours, someone can take every single ounce of self-confidence you had (which wasn't much to begin with) and just take it all away, and make you feel like complete shit.
We've made up, like I said, but I will NEVER trust this girl with my heart again. I dunno... it's just kind of turned my world upside-down. It's a huge slap in the face and, you know, if this had happened to me four years ago, I'd be in really bad shape. Sure, I cried my proverbial eyes out all night, but I think I'm going to be just fine... which is a lot more than I can say for some people. | | |
| I'm not bothering with this thing anymore. I already have two other 'blogs at myspace and livejournal. Xanga is the bottom of the barrell, as far as Internet weblogging is concerned.
Peace. | | |
| So, I'm really upset (about him/us) and I text my boyfriend about it several times only to get this message in return: "Stop it please" and then, "Dude, I'm busy."
Ahh, "dude, I'm busy".. the words of love. 
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen. | | |
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