Well, two exams down, one more to go!!! I can’t wait to get them out of the way, I hate exams. For next year, I’ve chosen modules that are all coursework, no exams at all lol. It’s gonna be sweet ^_^

But yeah, just thought I’d give you all an update. I’ve managed to get down to 120 XD Yay! Lowest I’ve ever been! I was 120 about a week ago but then went on a stupid pointless binge (more social eating, you know I can’t handle it)

But I’ve been working hard this week and have managed to get back on track so hopefully more loss soon ^_^

Summer’s gonna be hard to stay focused, what with moving back and forth between families so often (and each bloody family is obsessed with food, it sucks >< ) but I’m comfortable enough at the weight I am now that I’m not going to freak out if I don’t lose. I just don’t want to gain. As long as I can get through a few months of familyness, then come September, I can move into the new place and start up my diet plan again. I can make it until then. If I get forced to eat, I get forced to eat. Just have to make it a rule that I only eat if someone’s watching.

<b>New Foods I Love:</b>

(these are amazing, they’ve really helped me get through exam-stress. Not because they’re particularly stress-busting, but because I have to eat to keep my energy up for the exams, and they’re all so amazingly healthy and low-cal that I don’t beat myself up about it!)

Batchelors Slim-a-Soup (don’t know if you can find them outside the UK but basically it’s a diet version of instant soup, and each flavour’s about 50-60 calories for a huuuuuuge mug of it. It takes ages to drink and it’s so filling, it’s great)

Asparagus (I loooooooove asparagus! On my fruit and veg days, when I feel like something warm, I just cook some carrots, sweetcorn, spinach and asparagus in boiling water and it’s only like 4 calories per spear! How ridiculous is that? XD )

Happy Salads (yeah, these really helped me when studying was starting to get to me. Basically just your everyday salad- well, it depends what you class as your everyday salad, really. Mine is usually lettuce, celery, cucumber, tomatoes and radish. But for a Happy Salad to cheer me up, I’ve been adding cress, chopped apple, grapes and grated carrot. The brighter colours make me feel better, and I arrange it into a flower-shape for extra prettiness ^_^ )

Cheatburgers (now I haven’t tried these yet, but they’re on my meal plan for tomorrow so I hope they turn out good! Basically, you get some vegetarian mince -Quorn mince is 329 calories for an entire bag!!! And I’m pretty sure for one or two burgers, you’d only use about a ¼ of the bag anyway. It all depends. But still, very healthy. Anyways, you get some mince and roll it into balls, then you push a cube of cheese inside each burger and grill them until they’re cooked. It’s as easy as that. Then you’re left with yummy healthy burgers that have melted cheese oozing inside when you bite into them! I really hope they’re as good as they sound, I’ve been looking forward to them for a week lol)

And, last but by no means least, my absolute favourite, my latest obsession…

Crunchy Fruit Salad (omigod, I really am in love with it. Just chuck a load of tasty fruit into a bowl. Raspberries, grapes, cherries, strawberries, anything you want. Then add about ½ cup of dry low-cal muesli- I’ve been using Weight Watchers Light and Crispy Museli, it’s gorgeous- mix it all up then pour some low-fat yoghurt over it. Then have an orgasm lol. Trust me. It’s amazing.)

Anyways, yeah, those are pretty much what I’ve been living on when I haven’t been binging or forced to social-eat. I’m really sorry I haven’t been online much and haven’t been commenting or anything. I just want you to know that I love and miss all of you and I hope you’re all doing well. If you’ve lost weight since we last spoke, then well done and keep it up!!! ^_^ And if you haven’t, don’t despair and never lose hope! I know we can all do this, no matter how long it takes, no matter how hard it can be. We all have the courage to survive it.

Wish me luck! <3

Well, I somehow miraculously stayed at 123 this monring, despite the epic FAIL that was yesterday. God. I hate social eating. I know I go on about it a lot, but I really do. It's just so awkward. Being vegetarian never helps either, because people feel like they have to go out of their way to make sure there's always an 'alternative' for me, and that there's plenty of it so I'm not deprived ><

So yeah. Basically got pressured into eating a lot of corn-on-the-cob (no butter though, thank christ), some bread rolls and a bit of cheese. It could be worse, but it could also have been a lot better. I had my two veggie sausages, but skipped the bacon in the end to try and make up for some of the other crap I ate. I stayed the hell away from the alcohol though, which I was pretty impressed with ^_^

My mum's just text me and invited me over on Sunday, and I've made a personal vow to be nicer to her so I said yes. It may fuck up my diet plan, and they may all freak out because they haven't seen me since February (27 lbs ago lol) but I'm just going to stay positive, stay in control as much as I can, and try to be unselfish for once. Karma will hopefully reward me for it by giving me an easy, low-cal week afterwards XD

Anyways, today I'm having lemon mushroom pasta, which should hopefully be nice and healthy for me. It's basically just mushrooms marinated in lemon juice, garlic and herbs, then tossed with pasta. So nowhere near as bad as other pasta dishes, with all the sauces and cheese and crap. I'm feeling good about it. Just have to remember all the social events coming up (ie: party on Friday, my mum's on Sunday, bf's sister on Monday) and stay on track in preparation for them. No more binging! NO. MORE. BINGING. No more giving in to other people.

Sorry girls, but no thinspo today, I'm afraid. Am in the library at uni, and all my skinny pics are at home ><

Back down to 123. Woohoo! I do hope I get back into losing soon, I’m getting a bit bored of constantly jumping from 123 to 124. >< Still, I’m sure the period accounts for some of it, and hopefully that should go away soon. Positive, positive, positive. Just stay positive ^_^

Well, yesterday had it’s good points and bad points. The good was that I kept to my 100 cal limit. ^_^ I had soup (74), then later half a dry piece of toast (24) and a stick of celery (5). So yeah. 103 calories total. Yaaaaaay!

The bad news was that bf wasn’t feeling too good so we didn’t go for our usual long walk >< Booo. Walked to the shops and back, so at least I wasn’t stuck in the house all day. I guess it’s better than nothing, right?

Bf’s been a bit ill for a while now, so we went to see the campus doctor really early today but on the way, there was a… complication. Does anyone remember that time I randomly threw up at that bus stop? It happened again. I just felt so exhausted walking up, my chest was killing and I felt so dizzy and bleugh. So I had to stop not long after we’d set off and when I told bf what was wrong, he made me go home. So not much walking today either :( I got home and collapsed into bed for a while, then I had to rush to the bathroom and threw up. Not cool.

I don’t think it’s anything to worry about. I mean, like I said, it was really really early, I hadn’t had the best night’s sleep, I’m on my period, add to that the low intakes lately and I had like no energy whatsoever so my body just… freaked out I guess.

Anyways, because of this, there’s been a change of plan. I’m swapping my two days over. Today is fruit and veg day and tomorrow is 200 cal day. I’ve swapped because a) I think I really need to get my energy up, and b) one of our housemates isn’t coming back until quite late tonight, so I think we’re postponing the bbq until tomorrow. So yeah.

Oh man. And if you didn’t think I was in the wars as it is, I trapped my finger in a door last night. Soooooooo freaking painful. I bawled like a baby. It really hurt and I was terrified that I had broken it. It looked awful, I had a huge dent in my finger and it was all purple and swollen. But it went down after a while, although it still feels a little numb which is worrying. I don’t think it’s broken though, I can still move it and it doesn’t hurt anymore.

Love ya <3