| over the past few months so much has changed in my life. i went from
total and complete happiness to heartbreak, and now i'm back to
complete happiness. i've never felt so confused about how things work
out, and yet it doesn't bother me one bit. being hurt is one of the
worst things i've ever gone through, mainly because it was the first
time i've ever had to go through it. and yet i don't regret that
experience for the world. i cared about someone and they cared about
me, and nothing will ever
change that. it may be over now, but it
happened.. and they know it happened. it was great while it lasted and
i'm so thankful it did happen. but life isn't supposed to always work
out. life does not demand to be understood. you're not put on this
earth to get everything you want and
have it all work out. if that was how the world worked there wouldn't
be any challenge. you would never experience being hurt and growing
from that and realizing what you want. you're supposed to fall in love.
you're supposed to get hurt. you're supposed to find that one person
that makes you completely speechless. things are supposed to be
confusing and hard at times. not everything has an explanation. you're
supposed to learn from
experiences so that when another one comes along you can do something
different and maybe it'll turn out just right that time. bad things
will come your way just as much as good things will. it just takes time
for something right to come along. i never thought for the life of me
that i would have had what i had this year. it's not the fact that i
had it and lost it, but just that i experienced it. especially because it
came when i had stopped looking. that's the beauty of life in
general.. everything that you want to happen usually comes when you're
least expecting it. that's why i'm so happy now. i've come to realize
that
i don't need someone to make me happy. not saying i don't want someone,
because i obviously do. being alone is one of the hardest things to go
through. but i know that when i'm
supposed to be with someone, it will happen.
(so it's my birthday.. and i got my permit.)
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| i went to nyc yesterday and besides being surrounded by some
interesting people on the bus and going into illegal backrooms, this by
far was the highlight of my day.
kayy now i'm done.
(myspace)
ohh and 11 days until i'm 16.
welll sam tagged me so now i have to do 5 random things about me. hmm..
1. when i'm thinking hard about something i bite my lip.
2. i was named after a song by a group called Bread, haha.
3. i love taking walks at night in the summer and laying in the middle of the street.
4. my birthday is 3 days before christmas.
5. i hate not being with someone. i just miss the little things and everything.
kkbye.
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| remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
remember. cause that's all you can do.
i'm done.
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| uhh so i guess it's about time i update. things have been going
pretty.. umm interesting for me to say the least. there's so many
things i've come to realize about myself just by certain people and
certain things that have happened. i don't regret any of it. it's just
another chapter in my life that's done with as sam would say.. haha.
not saying i want that chapter to be over.. but i guess you can't
always get what you want.
anyyyways i turn 16 in practically a month which is amazing beyond
belief. once i can drive so many things will be changing. i think i'm
going to florida sometime around christmas too.. hopefully. that'd be
pretty amazing as welll.
alright well this is long enough and i'm way overdue for some bio homework that i've been putting off.
love.love.love.
nobody said it was easy,
nobody said it would be this hard.
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| it's funny how things work out.. |
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