titus2wife's Xanga

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Sat, 15 Jul 2006 21:30:14 GMT

Hi everybody... I hope everyone is having a great summer. It is 108 here is Santa Clarita, Ca.

Thank you to all of you who have sent me an e-mail asking if I have been okay. I know I have not posted in awhile. Right now I am taking a break as my Titus 2 Bible Study that I attend is on summer break.

I am not sure if I will be able to continue writing when September comes around. I am trying to help my husband start his E-Bay business. Lots of computer things to learn. His E-bay name will be "burnout50" and he will be selling Nascar stuff. That should not surprise you if you knew my favorite man ... Tom!

For those of you who want to continue to study on your own, a great book on the Titus 2 principles is "Created to Be His Help-Meet" by Debi Pearl. To order .... http://shop.nogreaterjoy.org/ A lot of Joanne's lessons from the Titus 2 Bible Study are from this book. (this is what I post the notes from - the Titus 2 study that Joanne teaches)

maranatha! dawn

Friday, April 28, 2006

Fri, 28 Apr 2006 01:37:48 GMT

Understanding the Bridegroom of Christ

The wedding is a culmination of a love story - a final chapter of a courtship and romance of a couple. Our American wedding customs come from the Greek and Romans; such as the engagement, the wedding cake, the rings, candles, church and ceremony. To understand the 'Bridegroom of Christ,' we need to understand and walk through the Jewish wedding customs.

In our culture, the Bride is the main star, and the mother of the bride puts on the wedding. In Jewish culture, the bridegroom's father puts on the wedding and the Groom is the main star.

And how is the bride chosen? In our culture, two young people meet, they fall in love, romance and lightening strikes, etc.! Parents are not involved in the process of picking out a partner. But in the Jewish culture, the father chose the woman (bride) for his cherished and loved son.

This gives us a better understanding of Ephesians 1:4 "For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight."

We have been hand picked by the Father and the Father has only one son. We have been chosen for that Son!

After the father chose the bride for the son, the next step was the betrothal. This was the first phase of a wedding. It is not engagement. Jewish customs did not allow for an engagement - you were either married or single. Betrothal is being legally married, but not physically consumating the marriage. The only way to break a betrothal was by divorce or death. In our current culture, the engagement is a transitional time, where we can still change our mind about getting married and return the ring.

2 Corinthians 11:2 "I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him."

Once a girl is chosen and the time is right, the young man and his father and a friend of the groom go to the bride's house. This was to ensure that a contract was being prepared and seen by two witnesses. Part of the contract was negotiating the bride price. This showed the bridegroom's intentions were serious because the bride price was very high! A young woman, the bride, would then understand how much she was valued!

1 Peter 1:18-19 "For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your forefathers, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect."

When you know and understand your value, that changes you! God knows we are but dust, but God has placed His value on us!

The contract and the 'bride price' spelled out the responsibilities of the bridegroom, his duties and the security of the bride...being a husband who would provide for her. The young woman (bride) has not been involved up until this point. She is then called into the room and asked if she will go with this man. She is offered a cup of wine and if she drinks it, she is agreeing to the contract. This is the cup of betrothal - this is the contract that Christ paid for you.

1 Corinthians 11:25 "...after supper He took the cup, saying, "This cup is the new covenant in my blood; do this, whenever you drink it, in remembrance of me."

The bridegroom would then leave with a promise to return to claim his bride. He would begin to construct a bridal chamber. The average time to construct a bridal chamber was approximately one year. At this point the couple was married, but have not physically consumated the marriage, or even kissed! A bridal chamber is where a newly married couple would spend one week alone together, consumate the marriage and even stock it with provisions. If a man was wealthy, it would be a very large, elaborate bridal chamber, beautifully decorated, fancy curtains, fine linens. If a man were poor, it would be more simple, maybe a small lean-to. The father of the bridegroom would inspect the bridal chamber and tell the son when it was completed. He would give advice on adding the finishing touches. A young man may be in a hurry to make a bridal chamber and could do a poor job to hurry and get his bride home!

John 14:2-3 "In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am."

This is what Jesus is doing right now. He has been building our bridal chamber for the last 2000 years. And remember, the first thirty years of his life, He was a carpenter! It is going to be beautiful!

What is the bride doing during this time? In Jewish culture, she now wore a veil, which showed other that she was taken. It is kind of like our engagement ring. The young bride is now preparing herself mentally. She is going from a little girl to a married woman. She is refocusing her thinking. She is preparing herself for her new role as a wife. She is now learning how to cook, to launder and make clothes, take care of children. She is watching her mom realizing that in a short time, she may also be a mother!

Romans 12:2 "but be transformed by the renewing of your mind"

The young woman is also making her wedding gown. She is using fine linen, decorations, & adornments for her anticipation of being presented to her groom. She is not using stained clothing or being skimpy in the use of material. She wants to present herself as a beautiful bride. Do we present ourselves to our bridegroom with a stained wedding dress? Our attitudes, thought life, tone of voice, resentment, anger, indifference ... stain our wedding dress! Is your wedding dress stained?

The father of the bridegroom decides when the chamber is ready and he inspects it. When it meets his approval, he gives permission for the young man to go claim his bride.

Matthew 24:36 "No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father."

At this point, it may be about a year later for the young woman. The friends of the groom would try to sneak out and catch the bride unaware and bring her to the groom! It was a kind of game. They had to give a shout just before they kidnapped the bride to bring her to the bridal chamber. This would give her about one minute preparation time before she was taken to meet her groom and consumate their marriage!

1 Thessalonians 4:16-17 " For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and with the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ will rise first. Then we who are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And thus we shall always be with the Lord."

At this point, news of the couple would reach the town and the people would get up and gather together to greet and congratulate the couple. Before they entered the bridal chamber, a blessing would be proclaimed over the couple, and then they would enter the bridal chamber and consumate their marriage. They would spend a week together in the bridal chamber and then join the wedding feast!

Actually, in the Jewish culture, this makes good sense, as this is where the courting and romance begins. (see Songs of Solomon) In our present culture, we have the courting and romance first, and then the marriage. And this is where a lot of marriages fail!

Our Prince, the Prince of Peace, really does come on His white horse and rescue us (Revelation 19) and take us away to His castle! The understanding of the Bride of Christ and it's symbolism really is the perfect love story. It is the only one that starts and ends with "living happily ever after!"

This was Joanne's last Titus 2 lesson for this semester. A great book on the principles of Titus 2 is ... "Created to be His Help Meet" by Debi Pearl. (order at www.nogreaterjoy.org )

If you have trouble understanding some of the symbolism or the forgiveness of Christ, please click here ...

http://contenderministries.org/romanroad.php

http://www.gotquestions.org/eternal.html

Another great xanga Titus 2 woman to visit this summer is Brenda at.... www.xanga.com/titus2mentor

maranatha ~ dawn

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Tue, 11 Apr 2006 03:30:37 GMT

Submission..... as an Act of Worship

The cutting of the wedding cake symbolizes the first task that a bride and groom perform jointly as husband and wife. It is a visual example of the mutual commitment that the bride and groom made to each other . A wedding cake is one of the highlights of the wedding, and the cake can sometimes be a work of art. Making a cake is a process of a lot of individual ingredients being added together. If these ingredients are taken and eaten separately, they taste yucky. Butter and flour and baking soda eaten alone are actually do not taste good alone. But mixed together, they make a wonderful and tasty wedding cake.

It is the same with the concept of submission . We don't like the idea of submission because of what society has taught us about submission. Our culture has given us a lot of confusion and misinterpretation in regards to this command. But as a bitter ingredient in a cake batter , mixed in properly, it makes a batter better. This is the Biblical example of submission.

Submission is not.. degrading ... demeaning ... being a doormat ... subjection ... dominance or devalue us as women .

The Bible is very clear. According to the Bible.....

Ephesians 5:22 "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord ."

Colossians 3:18 "Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord."

1 Timothy 2:11 "A woman should learn in quietness and full submission." (I liked the 'the Message' version of 1 Tim. 2:11..." I don't let women take over and tell the men what to do!")

Titus 2:5 KJV "To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."

1 Corinthians 11:3 (MSG) "In a marriage relationship, there is authority from Christ to husband, and from husband to wife. The authority of Christ is the authority of God."

Our God is a God of order and He designed our homes to be in order. The reason for order in our homes is to prevent chaos and confusion - not as a punishment, but as a blessing!

The original definition of the word submission (as the Bible uses it) is - 'to arrange yourself under someone's authority.' This means it is a choice and you do it voluntarily, no one forces you to do it. Submission is an act of worship whose primary purpose is to honor God. We submit with an attitude of respect, as we are commanded to.

The Amplified version of 1 Peter 3:5-6 says it best "For it was thus that the pious women of old who hoped in God were [accustomed] to beautify themselves and were submissive to their husbands [adapting themselves to them as themselves secondary and dependent upon them]. It was thus that Sarah obeyed Abraham [following his guidance and acknowledging his headship over her by] calling him lord (master, leader, authority). And you are now her true daughters if you do right and let nothing terrify you [not giving way to hysterical fears or letting anxieties unnerve you]."

Moms, you can remember when you tell your children something, and they do it. But when those children do what we ask stomping their feet and rolling their eyes instead of doing it cheerfully, we correct their attitude. The same is for us wives: we must submit in our attitude as well as in action. See the Message Version of 2 Corinthians 5:9 "Cheerfully pleasing God is the main thing, and that's what we aim to do, regardless of our conditions. "
There are no verses in the Bible that says to submit to your husband "IF"... If he treats me nice today, if he remembers my birthday, if he mows the lawn, if he makes me happy, if he deserves my respect ... etc. Sorry , there are NO IF'S!

Satan loves to twist and distort the Biblical definition of submission as we explain it away. This is the front on which he will attack our marriages. And remember that Satan's first original sin was refusal to submit to God! When we wives do not submit to our own husband, we rob our husband of their respect due them! And we blaspheme the Word of God! Titus 2:5 "teach the women to be... obedient to their own husbands ... that the word of God not be blasphemed."

As women, we go to Bible studies, conferences, retreats, we teach AWANA and Sunday School; and yet do our actions in our home blaspheme the Word of God? Women seek to control men through shame, a demeaning look, remark, accusation. As a man becomes more unsure of himself, we try to make him more controllable. Our culture teaches us that we are to control our men and not submit to them. Other ways that women/wives try to control men... screaming, scheming, manipulation, accusations, silence, secrecy, whining, withdrawal (especially behind the bedroom door), tears, pouting, depression. pity, correcting your husband in public, not expressing appreciation, etc. If as a women you seek to control your husband, he may not leave you physically (or he may) but leave emotionally by being absorbed in television, computer, hobbies, work or another woman. Do you see any habits that you need to change? (I do!)

Look (and hear) at how you talk with your husband and communicate respectfully. We use this concept in business relationships with a boss, yet we can be so disrespect to our own husband! I am learning too. God isn't finished with me yet, either.
This was a powerful lesson Joanne taught last week and I tried to capture the essence of it in this blog. If any reader would like a audio copy of the CD, please e-mail me and I will send it out to you.

If you need help with, please click here... http://www.contenderministries.org/romanroad.php

http://www.gotquestions.org/eternal.html

maranatha ~ dawn

Friday, April 07, 2006

Fri, 07 Apr 2006 23:51:33 GMT

Phoenix Spring Titus 2 Workshop

A Titus Two Workshop (building a home by His design based on Titus 2:3-5) offered by Bethany Bible Church - Thursday, May 25 and Friday May 26; 8:30am to 4pm each day.Thursday will be all practical teaching and interaction; Friday will be counseling tips, case studies, teaching and interaction. Carol Jones and other leaders will be teaching.This Titus 2 Bible Study is what the Santa Clarita group is modeled after.

Registration will be by email. Please send your name, address, phone number and if you are first timer or returnee. Send your check, made out to Christown Women's Bible Study to PO Box 36231, Phoenix, AZ 85067.

First timer fee is $60.00 before May 5 and $70.00 after May 5; this fee includes notebook for first timers, snack, drinks and lunch for all attendees.

Returnee fee is $35.00; Please bring your own notebook, extra notebook is $10.00.

Space is limited to 40 attendees. There will not be a separate mailing for registration. No childcare is available.

Workshop is at Bethany Bible Church, 6060 N 7th Ave; NW corner of 7th Ave and Bethany Home Rd in Phoenix.

Expect to leave this workshop with a heart's desire and knowledge to honor and obey God's plan for your marriage and home and the tools through scripture and practical helps to encourage and give hope to other women hurting in their marriage relationship

E-mail me for contact info.

Ladies, please do not think ‘retreat,’ think “BIBLE BOOT CAMP!” You will come home changed with a new outlook on marriage. I am not sure if I will be going yet. I would like to go but our new home business has taken up a lot of my time. But if God wants me there, it will happen! ~ dawn

Monday, March 27, 2006

Mon, 27 Mar 2006 17:15:49 GMT

Three Types of Men

This is a long post, a summary taken from the book, “Created to be His Help Meet,” by Debi Pearl. (Available at www.NoGreaterJoy.org) Although it is a summary, it is still long! As it was presented, men in three types, I poo pooed this idea, but after discussion in our small groups, found this to be very true!

No single man will completely express the well rounded image of God. If he did, he would be the perfect man. Most men are a little of all three types, yet tend to be more dominant in one. God created man to express one side of His triad nature. Hopefully, you should be able to identify your husband and see if you have been a curse or a blessing to him.

God is dominant – a sovereign and all powerful God. He is also visionary – omniscient and desirous of carrying out His plans. And God is steady – the same yesterday, today and forever.

Wisdom is to know what you have when you married your man, and learning to adapt to him as he is, not as you want him to be. So we need to begin to understand the different types of men. There are basically three types of men.

Mr. Command Man… is the born leader. They end up in positions that command other men. They are often chosen by other men to be military commander, politicians, preachers and heads of corporations. Winston Churchill, George Patton and Ronald Reagan are example of these dominant men. Since our world only needs a few leaders, God seems to limit the number of the “Command Men.” Command men usually do more than what is required of them and are known for expecting their wives to wait on them hand and foot.

These men also have less tolerance, and will often walk off and leave their clamoring wife before she has a chance to realize that she is close to losing her marriage. By the times she realizes there is a serious problem, she is already a divorces mother seeking help in raising her children alone. A woman can fight until she is blue in the face, yet the Command man will not yield. He is not intimate or vulnerable as are other men in sharing his personal feelings or vocation with his wife. He seems to be sufficient unto himself. A woman married to this man has to earn her place in his heart by proving she will stand by her man, faithful, loyal and obedient. When she has won his confidence, he will treasure her to the extreme.

The Command man feels it is his duty and responsibility to lead people, and do he does. This is what the public is most comfortable with. Very few people have enough confidence to strike out on their own. He will be uncomfortable dealing with the sick, helpless and dying.

On 9-11, when the World Trade Center was destroyed, another plane flying over Pennsylvania was being hijacked by terrorists. Mr. Todd Beamer was on that plane and it is his voice we heard saying that now famous line, “Let’s roll.” He was probably a strong Mr. Command Man. He and others like him took control of a desperate situation and saved many other lives while sacrificing his own. Mr. Beamer evaluated the situation, made a decision and acted upon it. A good Mr. Command Man sees the bigger picture and strives to help the greatest number, even if it costs him his life.

A King wants a Queen, which is why a man in command wants a faithful wife to share his fame and glory. If a wife learns early to enjoy the benefits of taking the second seat, and does not take offense to his headstrong aggressiveness, she will be sitting at his right side being adored. This kind of man will totally adore his woman and exalt her. If you are married to a king, honor and reverence is something that you must give him on a daily basis if you want him to be a benevolent, honest, strong and fulfilled man of God. Never shame him, belittle him or ignore his accomplishments. If the wife of this man resists his control, he will move forward without her. Such was the example of King Ahasuerus of Persia in the book of Esther.

The wife of Mr. Command man can ruin her marriage by failing to honor, obey and reverence her husband’s authority and rule. She can also heal her marriage by becoming his adoring Queen, honoring and obeying his every (reasonable and unreasonable) word. She will dress, act and speak so as to bring him honor everywhere she goes.

Mr. Visionary… Some of you are married to men who are shakers, changers and dreamers. They can get the entire family upset about peripheral issues. The issues may be serious and worthy of one’s commitment, but in varying degrees, these men have tunnel vision. They may easily pick up and relocate without any idea of what they are going to do for a living at their new location.

Visionaries are often gifted man or inventors and it was probably these kinds of men who conquered the Wild West. Today, the Visionary men are the street preachers, political activists, organizers and instigators of any front line social issue. They love confrontation and hate the status quo. They keep the rest of the world from getting stagnant or dull. The Visionary is consumed with a need to communicate with his words, music, writing, voice, art or actions. He is the “voice crying out in the wilderness” trying to change the way humanity is behaving or thinking. These men need a good, wise, prudent, stable wife who has a positive outlook on life.

If you are married to one of these fellows, expect to be rich or poor, rarely middle class. He may invest everything in a chance and lose it all, or make a fortune! He will not do well working in an 8 to 5 job, in the same place for thirty years.

He may purchase an alligator farm in Florida or a ski resort in Colorado, or he may buy an old house trailer for $150 with hopes of fixing it up and selling it for $10,000, only to find out that it is so deteriorated that it can’t be moved. He then will have his wife and kids help him tear off the top and carry the scraps to the dump, so he can make a farm trailer out of the axles. Now that he has a farm trailer and no animals, expect him to get a deal on three old sick cows and …etc. He may never be rich in money, but he will be rich in experience.

If this is your type of man, learn how to be flexible and how to always be loyal to your man. Life will become an adventure when you go with the flow – his flow. People looking on will marvel that you are able to love and appreciate your husband. It is because you see his greatness! Thomas Edison was probably a visionary, and became great after his 999^th failure to make a light bulb. The Wright brothers were great when they neglected their occupation of fixing bicycles and wasted time trying to make one of them fly.

This types of man needs your enthusiastic support, not a critique of his ideas. He will look at his idea more critically later, but for the moment, the idea itself is invigorating to him. He may have a thousand ideas for every project he attempts, and will try many that he will never finish, and will finish some that are worthless. If he can not share his ‘dumb ideas’ with you, he will share them with someone else! Let him burn out on things that are not wise, but don’t throw water on his fire. He needs a lady that is full of life and joy. Mr. Visionary will start and keep the party going until the Command Man gets there to lead on.

The wife of Mr. Visionary can ruin her marriage by failing to follow, believe and participate as an enthusiast in her husband’s dreams and visions. She can heal her marriage by laying aside her own dreams and aspirations and embracing her role as help meet to her man, believing in him and being willing to follow him with joyful participation in the path that he has chosen.

Mr. Steady…This type of man is caring, providing, and faithful, like a priest – like Jesus. He is in the middle, not given to extremes. The Mr. Steady man does not make snap decisions or spend his last dime on a new idea, and doesn’t try to tell people what to do. He will avoid controversy. He doesn’t invent the light bulb like the Visionary, but he will be the one to build the factory and manage the assembly line that produces it.

Mr. Steady would never lead a revolution against the government or the church. He will selflessly fight the wars that the Visionary man starts and the Command man leads.

Being married to Mr. Steady has rewards and trials. This man does not put undue pressure on you to perform miracles and doesn’t expect you to be his servant. When you are married to a man who is steady and cautious, and you have a bit of the impatient romantic in you, you may not see his worth and readily honor him. You may be discontent because he is slow and cautious to take authority or make quick decisions. If you are a bossy woman, you see him as wishy-washy because his is a follower. There is no exciting rush in him, just a slow steady climb with no bells or whistles. There are times you may wish he would boldly tell you what to do so you would not have to carry all the burden of decision making.

A Mr. Steady man likes a woman to walk beside him, yet grow in her own right before God and him. He will want you to use your natural skills, abilities and drives. You must learn how to pay bills, make appointments and entertain guests with competence that brings him satisfaction. Your skills and achievements will be your husband’s resume.

The wife of Mr. Steady can ruin her marriage by failing to appreciate, wait on and be thankful for her husband’s pleasant qualities. The wife can also heal her marriage by joyfully realizing what a friend, lover and companion she has been given and living out that gratitude verbally and actively. When she stops trying to change him, he will grow. She can then willingly take up the tasks that will fill her time and give her husband joy and satisfaction when he sees her productiveness.

Do you see your type of man? I do! Can you be the help meet for the man God created him to be – or are you going to try to change him? If you need help,click here…

http://www.contenderministries.org/romanroad.php

http://www.gotquestions.org/eternal.html

marantha~ dawn

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 16:24:27 GMT

What is Your Idol?

After the wedding comes the honeymoon and after the honeymoon comes reality. When you unpack your honeymoon suitcase, what kind of baggage are you carrying? We all have suitcases full of our expectations. Expectations of what we think marriage should be like. And usually it isn’t quite what we expected. We marry a man, and then act surprised when he acts like … a man! He burps, snores, scratches, watches television, gets angry and doesn’t communicate to our liking. Our unfulfilled expectations can become our longings, which turn to self pity, self absorption and can spiral into depression. Our expectations become our idol.

My leader used Rachel from the Bible as our idol detector. She stole her father’s household gods, small idols thought to ensure prosperity in Genesis 31:19. She later lied about taking those idols (Genesis 31:34-35). Jacob later made sure that all the idols were purged from his household.

Genesis 30:1, Rachel says to Jacob, “Give me children, or else I die!”

Is there something in your life that you think you must have … or you will die?

Discontentment traps us into thinking which was enough, is no longer enough. We can use our children, our husbands, our homes or the size of our paychecks to compete with other women. And we fall into the idol of happiness. We tell ourselves that ‘God doesn’t want me to be unhappy or to suffer!’ And we become the ‘me-ism’ (it is all about me) unfulfilled Cinderella syndrome. (I personally think that Cinderella 2 sequel would be about her Prince Charming husband drinking every night & coming home late, he is out of work and has a mistress on the side, they live in a run down trailer with seven children!)

We were not promised happiness as stated in John 16:33 “…in the world you will have tribulation…, Philippians 1:29 “…but also to suffer for His sake…,” and again Romans 8:17 “…if indeed we suffer with Him…”

The things that become the idol of happiness can be … more children … less children … romance … more money …parent’s approval … career … time to yourself … being thinner … healing … godly husband … obedient children … appreciation by others … friendships … imaginations … bigger house … financial security … better car … different schools … a man who doesn’t drink ... a father who leads devotions… your family’s opinion of your man… You can fill in the blank.

An idol is (by definition) a false conception, a fallacy, preoccupation, obsession, fixation or desire. An idol is a construction of our minds expectations. What have you allowed your mind to dwell on? Are you dwelling on what you don’t have instead of what you do?

I plead guilty of this trap as well. (Please see the disclaimer on the side. I do NOT claim to have mastered all this. I am just passing on what I am learning!)

I expected my husband to lead us in a short Bible reading after dinner. I brought out the Bible and he would get up and leave after dinner. My expectations of a father leading his family were turned into my children having a memory of dad leaving the table when we brought out the Bible! Rather than argue with him, my leader urged me to turn our Bible time into a breakfast reading with me and the kids (when dad was already at work).

Loving and respecting our children’s father leaves a legacy of righteousness! (I had to constantly be reminded of this by my leader!)

And for our children, we are the first reflection of God in their lives. My attitude was tarnishing that reflection until I gave up my expectations – my idol!

What do you allow your mind to dwell on?

For those of you who know me personally, this past weekend I was at Las Vegas Motor Speedway - the Nascar event. It took a lot of prayer partners to help me to take my thoughts captive. (2 Corinthians 10:5) I am trying to learn to like Nascar. The past two years I actually cried by the third day. (yes, I cried tears!) I did much better this year! It was so cold and windy that after 25 laps, you had to get up out of the wind and walk around just to warm up. I used that as my cardio routine that day and did my own laps around LVMS. I took this time to force myself to think about how fortunate I was. I have a guy that wants me to be there with him. Tom doesn’t take me along to have me be miserable, but my thoughts were making me feel that way. And my feelings change. I had to make a choice of what I was going to allow myself to feel and dwell on those thoughts.

Retraining your thoughts does take practice!

Remember again Rachel and her idol of wanting children. It is ironic that she once said she would die unless she had children. In the end of her life, she was dying because of a child in child birth! (Genesis 35:18)

Look at your desires… could they be your idols? Are your expectations making you discontent with what you do have? What will you do to change that?

Do you need help? Click here…

http://www.contenderministries.org/romanroad.php

http://www.gotquestions.org/eternal.html

Edit: I want to make sure that the readers know I do like Nascar. (not to would be un-American!) I like learning about the drivers, the sponsors and all the photo ops. It is the sitting and watching for 200 to 300 laps that I have trouble with.

maranatha ~ dawn

Monday, February 27, 2006

Mon, 27 Feb 2006 15:27:39 GMT

Women and Addictions

As women, we fall into addictions that we are unaware of. The Bible should be our mirror to show us our imperfections and what we need to change. James 1:25 (NLT) "But if you keep looking steadily into God's perfect law--the law that sets you free--and if you do what it says and don't forget what you heard, then God will bless you for doing it."

As women we have a very easy time in finding the faults of others and how to fix their problems... especially our husbands. Our men do not need us to fix them, that is God’s job. It is our responsibility to turn our eyeballs inward and look at ourselves.

Matthew 7:1-5 (NKJV)Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

God is in control and He works all things together for good. (Romans 8:28) And note that it says ‘He’ not she! God doesn’t need us to tell Him how we would like our men to behave and/or work.

These are a few of the addictions that we women are unaware of. What are you addicted to?

The reasoning addict….. We want to know where, when and how something will happen. We worry and want everything all figured out and plans on the table. We want all the details of how something is going to work and with documentation. Stop being afraid of your husband's decisions and start trusting him. God's word tells us not to be impressed with our own wisdom. Proverbs 3:7 Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil.

The approval addict…. This person looks to other for validation. She is busy doing everything for everybody because she wants to be looked upon as a good person. She can get so busy helping those in need that she neglects what is really her first priority – her husband and family! What people think about her is very important and she becomes a perfectionist. She is actually very insecure and afraid. She is in bondage to the opinions of what people think of her and has made her own prison.

The control addict…. This person has no confidence in others to do a job correctly, especially her husband. She takes over a job because she has no faith that it can be done by anyone else but herself. This can also be in regards to finances. She manages all the details and is in charge of every part of the process. Her heart attitude is rebellious, stubborn, fearful and proud.

We are called to be believers and not achievers. Sometimes we put on a mask and become plastic saints. We are in bondage to our anxiety, fear, need for approval, affirmation,vanity, insecurity and pride. Give the leadership back to your husband and be the helper that you were created to be. God did not design us as women to be in charge. Simplify your life! Have faith in your husband and his leadership and decisions.

Lack of faith is fear! If you are fearful, then instead of believing God, you believe the devil’s lies. Fear is faith in what the devil says!

Romans 8:15 (NKJV) For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear…

Peter 3:6 (NIV)…like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.

Matthew 13:58 And he did not do many miracles there because of their lack of faith.

Lack of faith can also hinder what God can do in your marriage. I looked at the example of Salome who performed a dance for Herod. (Matthew 14:3-12) She went to her mother for advice. Her mother Herodias gave her some bad advice asking for the head of John the Baptist. She used her daughter to manipulate her husband into doing her will.

Sometimes your friends and your family can give you bad advice. Is the advice you get in contradiction to what the Bible says? If it is not in agreement with God, maybe you should rethink the advice!

Are you able to let your husband handle the decisions in the home? To make him become a leader, he will need a follower. Can that follower be you?

This is something I am still learning to do. One of my examples is learning to become the Nascar fan he would like me to be. For his birthday, (February 29) we will be going to Las Vegas Motor Speedway for the Nascar Busch and Nextel Cup race in mid March. I can think of lots of reasons why I could not go...child care, expense, weather, traffic, boredom... but he really likes me to be with him. I have to have the faith that I will have a good time with him. My homework is to take out my 'Nascar for Dummies' and to begin studying up on some of the drivers and learn why Nascar is such a passion for him. The book is actually pretty interesting. The real faith is riding home with him, after he has been watching drivers at 190 mph for three days. I guess as I am a geologist wanna-be, he is a Nascar driver wanna-be!

Can you have faith to enjoy what your husband likes? It could be fishing, golf, baseball or another activity? We go, watch and participate in our children's activites. Plan on participating with him in something this week that he likes. Show him you do not want control, approval or reasoning. Just enjoy him for the man God created him to be.

Ask God to help you with this...

http://www.contenderministries.org/romanroad.php

http://www.gotquestions.org/eternal.html

Happy Birthday to my favorite boyfriend - Tom !!

love your favorite wife ~ dawn

Just for fun, do you see any faults in the rock formation in the background picture?

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Wed, 15 Feb 2006 19:31:39 GMT

Respect and the Seductress

The seductress isn’t always a woman who is more beautiful, bustier, thinner or a better lover.

She is the woman who traps our man through deceptive flattery. Look how she does it...

Proverbs 7:5 (NIV) …the wayward wife with her seductive words…

Proverbs 7:21 (NLT) So she seduced him with her pretty speech. With her flattery she enticed him.

Proverbs 2:16 (the Message)… that smooth-talking seductress…

Proverbs 5:3 …the lips of a seductive woman are oh so sweet, her soft words are oh so smooth.

Our men need to hear words of respect from their wife! If they don’t hear respect from us, they may seek it elsewhere.

Take this respect test. Are you doing everything you can to lift up your man…or are you making him prey for the seductress?

Ephesians 5:33b… and the wife must respect her husband.

The Respect Test

The respect test is pass or fail. If you get just one of these questions wrong, you have homework.

1. Do I let my husband talk?

(Am I correcting him in public, cutting him off, interrupting, finish his sentences? Am I willing to be quiet and say nothing or do I need to give my two cents?)

2. Do I willingly submit or do I argue my cause?

(Do I have an overwhelming need to convince him that my way is better?)

3. Do I ask him to do things or do I tell him?

4. Do I lift him up in others eyes or tear him down? (Do I complain to friends, joke about his inadequacies, and undermine him?)

5. Am I willing to look foolish in order to make him look good? (Or am I one of those people who wants it known that I would have done things differently had the decisions been up to me?)

6. Do I pray for a respect for him? (Ask God to enable you to have a respect for your husband.)

7. Do I look for what he is doing well? (Keep records of his rights)

8. Do I communicate to him what I respect about him?

9. Do I make his priorities my priorities? (Even when the priorities seem stupid?)

10. Do I esteem him more highly than myself?

Respect is not a feeling, it is an action.

Ephesians 5:23

For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church,

Colossians 3:18

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

1 Peter 3:5

For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands,

Titus 2:4-5

Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

Proverbs 4:1

The wise woman builds her house,
but with her own hands the foolish one tear hers down.

Proverbs 12:4

A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.

Proverbs 1:26

She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

Proverbs 31: 11-12

Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.

James 1:26

If anyone thinks himself to be religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless

You can’t do this in your own strength. Ask the Lord for help…

http://www.contenderministries.org/romanroad.php

http://www.gotquestions.org/eternal.html

maranatha~ dawn