From July 16:
Another week has passed and we arrive once more at the time to address a burning question that has arisen during college football's interminable offseason.
A week ago, I addressed the matter of Steve Spurrier's return to the S.E.C. and predicted that the Evil Genius would improve the Gamecocks to the level of consistent mediocrity. Since then, though, the news has broken that (as was the case at Florida fifteen years ago) the guy Darth Visor just replaced has gotten the school into hot water with the N.C.A.A. (http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=2107170).
With any luck, probation will help knock South Carolina down a notch or two; if I were picking a coach upon whom and a program upon which to wish a string of 4-7 seasons, I couldn't pick a coach more deserving than Steve Superior or a squad more deserving than the Palmetto State Poultry. Given that South Carolina's fan base has the S.E.C.'s least favorable ratio of arrogance to achievement, I'm rooting for the N.C.A.A. to drop the hammer on the Dirty Birds.
One side effect of this, however, is that it may cause me to be proven wrong in my measured confidence in the Ol' Ball Coach's ability to turn things around in Columbia. Since I may have lost ground in that regard, I will be focusing now on a matter of greater historical significance than coaching changes or conference realignment. This week, we will tackle an age-old debate as we attempt to answer the following inquiry:
Historically, what are the all-time top 25 programs in Division I-A college football?
This question was presented to me earlier this summer by an old friend of mine, Chad Tiller, who is from Georgia but who has lived in Texas for the last several years. He recently was listening to sports talk radio in the Lone Star State when a Texas A&M fan called in and referred to the Aggies in passing as a major college football program. This started an on-air discussion over whether Texas A&M truly qualified as a major program, considered in the light of the entirety of college football history.
Chad wrote to me to ask that I compile an all-time top 25 list of major college football programs. Having done so for him, I decided to share the results with all of you, in the hope of settling or starting an argument, depending upon your preference.
I did not attempt to rank the top 25 all-time college football programs from first through 25th. Instead, I went conference-by-conference through the 2004 members of the A.C.C., the Big East, the Big Ten, the Big Twelve, the Pac-10, and the S.E.C. and made note of the obvious teams that unquestionably made the cut. I then went back through and looked at the ones that were debatable. Some "mid-major" conference teams were given consideration in the second round of selections, but it seemed abundantly clear that none warranted inclusion the first time through the line.
Through no design of my own, my initial list of teams that undeniably qualified as top 25 all-time college football programs included 24 teams. In alphabetical order, these are they:
1. Alabama
2. Arkansas
3. Auburn
4. Clemson
5. Florida
6. Florida State
7. Georgia
8. Georgia Tech
9. Iowa
10. Louisiana State
11. Miami (Florida)
12. Michigan
13. Michigan State
14. Minnesota
15. Mississippi
16. Nebraska
17. Notre Dame
18. Ohio State
19. Oklahoma
20. Penn State
21. Southern Cal
22. Tennessee
23. Texas
24. Washington
Seriously, it is absolutely inconceivable to me that anyone could quarrel with any of the teams listed above.
That left just one spot on my countdown up for grabs and open for debate. It seemed to me, on my second run through the lists of contenders, that there were eight teams with an argument for inclusion. Those eight teams are as follows:
1. Brigham Young
2. Miami (Ohio)
3. Pitt
5. Texas A&M
6. Texas Christian
7. U.C.L.A.
8. Wisconsin
Personally, I think I would have to give the nod either to Texas Christian or to Syracuse. Admittedly, much of this is on gut instinct, so my mind might be changed about which of the foregoing eight qualified for the final spot in the all-time top 25, but, as I say, I cannot imagine that any honest college football fan would find fault with my top 24. (I hope my attempt to be unbiased is evident from the fact that I included nine of Georgia's conference or other longstanding rivals in my top 24.)
Because the question of the Aggies' all-time stature sparked this discussion, I should point out that, in my estimation, the list Texas A&M really belongs on is the list of teams whose fans think they're an all-time top 25 college football program but whose fans are just plain kidding themselves.
This places Texas A&M in a club with Boston College, Cal, Illinois, Kentucky, Maryland, North Carolina, N.C. State, Oklahoma State, Oregon, South Carolina, Virginia, Virginia Tech, and the service academies. (Kentucky's and Maryland's unconvincing argument for inclusion, by the way, sounds a lot like Texas A&M's: "We had Bear Bryant once!" Yeah, and the Atlanta Falcons had Dan Reeves and Brett Favre, too, but that doesn't make them a top 25 N.F.L. franchise.)
Between the bonfire, "The Aggie War Hymn," the 12th Man, the marching band, and the yell leaders, Texas A&M is not only a top 25 school, but a top five school, where school spirit is concerned. Unfortunately, the primary criterion for inclusion on the list of all-time top 25 college football programs is performance on the field and the Aggies fall somewhat short in this regard. A hundred years of 7-4 doth not a major program make. (Yes, I know there were years in which the Aggies were a Southwest Conference power. Many, if not most, of those years coincided with the period during which the S.W.C. couldn't so much as score a touchdown in the Cotton Bowl.)
While we are talking about Texas A&M, though, I offer the following trivia question for your consideration. If you answer it correctly, you get nothing except the satisfaction of having been right (which, really, has always been quite good enough for me), but you are ineligible to enter the contest if you have ever co-hosted a local cable access television show with me. The question is this:
If I were to appear in a Texas A&M home game as the 12th Man, what would I have in common with Hines Ward, the former University of Georgia standout and current Pittsburgh Steeler?
Go 'Dawgs!
