BLACK FRIDAYSo it's my favorite holiday this Thursday, Thanksgiving, which of course is followed by women's (and let's face it, gay men's) Super Bowl, Black Friday. For those of you who don't know, Black Friday is so named because the day after Thanksgiving is the traditional day when the Pilgrims went shopping and the Blacksmith made all his money.
I'm starting to think it's called Black Friday because of how early the sales start at more and more stores. Just today I saw a major retailer advertising their opening time for the day after Thanksgiving at 4 a.m.; it's still dark, or "black" outside at 4 a.m. Get it?
Seriously, is this necessary? Don't get me wrong, my favorite "news" videos are of rabid shoppers lined up like they're going to run the 100-meter dash to get the one Furby at the local toy store, and then someone trips and falls and gets trampled by the 400-pound soccer moms, desperate to get little Jimmy his favorite new toy that he's going to love forever...or at least for five solid minutes.
It's pure comedy. Well, not for the one who falls, but for the rest of us it's amazing. If she starts crying about how crazy those people who trampled her are, it's even better because what are the holidays all about if not for criticizing the very event in which we were poised to participate, but then failed miserably in front of millions of horrified, yet entertained viewers?
Just to be safe, I'm going to start lining up now to make sure I get a good seat so I can watch as it happens live. Gobble, gobble, y'all! | 
