im back to xanga because myspace is whack !! or maybe the "online bangers" that have no life. but yea, i deleted my myspace and imma just use xanga again. so ill just post pictures up on here and let people know whats good with me on here?! lol ok thats about all.

<3 csan

i have standards for myself and i dont expect everyone to feel the same way as i do. so i dont mean to upset anyone its just how i see things.

whatever happened to repsecting yourself?? does anyone not have any morals or standards?? sex is overrated.  our generation seems to be gettin` worse by the minute. shouldnt sex be a connection between two people that goes deeper than just the physical feeling? it just seems like no one cares anymore.   

lately ive been hearing about these hoe-ish girls and it makes me sick. and when i hear that these girls are upset cause "them guys" dropped you after that one night all i have to say is if you act like a hoe you deserve to be treated like one. i dont have any pity on them at all. did you really expect a guy to make you his main squeeze when you gave it up to him after only knowing him for a few days or less?? i dont think so. all these guys already have their girlfriends they just lookin` for their side. no guy wants a serious relationship with some easy female. thats why us females cant let guys do that to us. respect urself dont let them have control. make them work for you. our whole being is worth more than just that one night. dont let them lessen that.

this is nonsense..............  

april 14, 2005                    cover girl-brooke valentine

today i just went to school went home slept. woke up did some chem homework. then cleaned i cant believe it i actually cleaned haha more than 5 minutes long too! haha i washed all the dishes and cleaned my bathroom till it was sparkely clean. forsure haha m proud cause im hella lazy!! and i hate cleaning but i dont its about time i grow up and start taking care of myself and stop relying on my mom to do stuff for me. i guess you can say im a bit spoiled when it comes to house chores. plus i overheard my stepdad talking to my brother saying how spoiled he is getting money all the time and not even doing anything stuff like that. but i dont get money from them. only like 20 bucks every two weeks...hahah but i aint complaining i just needa get a job. i just dont want a job to interfere with school. and not only that but i see how hard my mom works to take care of us and we dont show how much we appricate her so imma try more. cause it must be hard working 5 days a week plus taking care of 4 people. thats alot. so anyway i can help her out more i certainly will. i guess  i got to all this thinking because in school we were talking about ho life was in the 50's compared to now and wow what a big difference it is. in psyc. class we were talking about our furture life and about our rents. soo yeaa seeee school does have an impact. hahaha.i just dont show it much?! ok ughh im bored ok enough said for now.

-csan  

april 13, 2005         ghost of a good thing-dashboard confessionals

today was pretty tiring. i went to school you know the usual. in english i got this quote from the play les miserables i loooove it. 

"loving another person is to see the face of god" 

or something like that im too lazy to get my notebook from my car. but thats basically what it says. anyways on a lighter note my chemistry sub. looked like the acotr of freddy kroger seriously! funny stuff. afterschool i ate then fell asleep till 7. woke up wathed oceans 12 and americas next top model. took a shower and stuff. now im here. the stuff i was saying last night man what was i thinking?!?  haha i really dont know.

last night i was hella iritated  because of what someone said about me. i dont like it when people assume that im a certain way without really knowing how i am. do i really look that shallow to you??  at least i know what you really think of me now. now i dont have to waste my time. im not gonna waste my time trying to convince people of who i am anymore. if you want to see the real me then youd find a way but till then dont make assumptions of me. hmmm...and to actually think i liked this person alot wow ...ok enough said.   

-csan