she's a paper cutout doll; and she's beautiful.
though always a frown scribbled
by her own paper will.

you wonder how she sees herself skewed
when she's but drawn
flat out for all
beautiful, but hidden
from her paper sight.

folded by doubts
tear-proof by luck
flushed like cranberry
sprayed lightly in air
loved and loving
from her paper heart.

yet fooled by her paper soul.

Currently Listening Amnesiac By Radiohead see related

- I Might Be Wrong

Well,

SAT's on saturday.  I'm scared?  I should relax like Jamie and Sanam and Azia.  If i screw up i'll study for a good few months for the may test...it'll all work out.

New celly.  Works and doesn't cut out every few seconds.  I love that.  muhaha.  It takes videos and stuff, i love it.  Pretty red.

We need more people in yearbook.  Our staff in charge of getting this entire 360+ page book published is a grand total of like 15.  Only 5 are staffers, meaning only 5 take the pictures/ write the captions while the rest of us edit / put pictures on pages / etc.  I'm worried for Anna and Jamie; oh the stress.

AP TEST dates have been set.  My two are May 3rd, wednesday  and May 8th, monday.  My calc teacher decided to teach us one more chapter...and its not on the ap exam...so why?  So by the time we finish that chapter it will be the middle of february, giving us two and a half months to review.  i hope its enough.  it probably is.

Shant needs to die.  He hates Mr. Vanderway, the best teacher i've ever met / one of the greatest people ever, for the most ILLOGICAL REASONS. 

1.  he has a ponytail
2.  he wears shorts sometimes
3.  he "takes off points when somethings not perfect"

WHAT IN HELL?!  Some people, man.  Some people need to wake up.  If it's not perfect, its wrong, jackass.  Fuck.

I love sean.  i love caitering to him when he's sick...  he's so cute..

Looking forward to a lecture on Einstein in highlander hall on friday!  yay!  AND i get to miss french because i volunteered to go.  absolut sex.

I decided next year i'll be in speech and debate.  Or science bowl....

anyway, i'll end this with one of the funniest little cartoons in the world:

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

Currently Listening Illinois By Sufjan Stevens see related

- Out of Egypt, into the Great Laugh of Mankind, and I shake the dirt from my sandals as I run.

alright

1.  i currently have a violent reaction to the thought of gyms.
2.  and some of my friends.  mainly when shant is among them.
3.  sometimes i wish i could narrow my social life to sean..
4.  i have sex too much.  6 times in a week is too much.
5.  i need new clothing.  pants, preferably.
6.  finishing my guitar doesn't seem to lie in the near future.  or far future.
7.  boxer-briefs turn me on
8.  there are days when i see sean and think he's just the hottest piece of ass ever and i think "damn fuck that guys all for me"
9.  i'm sick of sufjan stevens yet love it all the same, maybe more
10.  i had a bad first impression of first impressions of earth
11.  emo boys are gay
12.  i'm going to be an expensive partner/husband/whatever.  i need nice clothes.
13.  i'm so gay that i feel uncomfortable unless clothes "hug" my body.  i said that to leslie today.  not stretch over it, "hug" it.
14.  2005, 2006, whatever i'm still not done with 1984.
15.  my mother washed sean's underwear and i thought they were my dads so i askd her to buy me some like it...and she said "aren't they yours..they were in your room."  sooo oc material.

anyway.  goodnight.
jamesy <3

Currently Listening Live It Out By Metric see related

- Empty

Wow its been a good while since i've written in this.

Anyway.  school's started.  yeah, i know, it started two months ago.  But I love my classes.  AP Calc BC, French 3, H American Lit, AP Physics C, Yearbook, and H U.S. History.  Yep a wonderful assortment.  I'm design editor of our yearbook, as stressful as it is with our new theme to come up with layouts.  But school's great anyway. 

I figure though...i impress too many teachers.  Sometimes it feels like i should do bad on tests and such..with the amounts of people who get frustrated with me and jealous to the point where its actually frustrating.  I mean when Anna decides to switch out of AP Physics (a stupid stupid move for college) and Yearbook (with her and Lindsay leaving, think of how much more work the other 5 staffers are going to do.. I dont think they've thought about that) and U.S. History (she's gone overboard with caring about that class..Anna's doing so well in it but for some reason she lets things like speeches and essays get to her simply because she thinks i'd do better...which is always wrong anyway), and she tells me its because she can't deal with being in any academic class with me....what else should i feel?

But on other notes...I should be writing this in my journal...i haven't written there for months either..Anyway Sean and I are still dating.  Yep itd be 5 months in 2 days, hehe.  I love that guy so much.  He and i are going to dinner and maybe a movie (when i tell him we should hehe) tonight.  Excited. :)

With Olivia...eh.  She freaked over something that I really couldnt involve myself in...and got mad at me when i didn't "support" her.  We had dinner plans friday night (yesterday)..but I guess she didn't want to see me.  I hate when she's mad at me for such stupid things.  It's so pointless.  But I hate not talking to her.

I'm still lagging on my reading while my list piles and piles up.  So far I've read Inferno (Dante), The Tao of Pooh, The Te of Piglet, Pooh Perplex, and Postmodern Pooh.  The List contains.

1. Harry Potter VI...
2. Finish New Rules
3. Finish 1984
4. Thus Spoke Zarathustra (Nietzsche)
5. A Sideways Look at Time
6. Writing and Difference (Derrida)
7. Purgatorio (Dante)
8. Paradisio (Dante)
9. Tuesdays with Morrie (maybe)
10. The Five People You Meet in Heaven (maybe)
11. Wilderness (Jim Morrison)
12. No One Here Gets Out Alive (Jim Morrison biography)
13. The Aenid (Virgil)
14. Beyond Good and Evil (Nietzsche)
15. Paradise Lost (Milton)

and there's more but I'll leave it to that.

And this concludes this entry.
<3 james

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