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vvskinny
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Birthday: 4/29/1987
Gender: Female
Interests: modeling, getting signed with FORD!, fashion, dance (pointe, ballet, jazz, funk, belly...everything!), pilates, yoga, s factor, shopping, Vogue, GOOD cinema and literature and all things beautiful
Expertise: I used to be 108. I've been there before but I'm not sure I want to be that skinny again. So, my new goal weight is 128 and then I'll re-evaluate once I'm there...
Height: 5'8" HW: 148 CW: see current post! GW1: 143 GW2: 138 GW3: 133 GW4:128
Occupation: student
Message: message me
AIM:  vvskinny
Member Since:
6/3/2004
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| 147.8 30.6% still incredibly bloated and blubby. just looked in the mirror and my silhouette is inrecognizable and unproportionally lumpy and strange. can't find my body brush so am starting the day with exercising while catching up on desperate housewives (still on season 2, got a long way to go...oops) have a minor headache, might be a detox one since yesterday for the first part of the day i was really good.
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| 148.8 31.3%
NO MORE!!! this is disgusting and scary and i can't take it anymore! hopping in the shower and then i'm starting clean...
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| denial is not just a river in egypt...ok so i've avoided posting in a pathetic display of denial...like if i don't post then no one can judge me and i can buy more time pigging out "last supper" style. new year's came and went and after 2 days of "eating right" i've already blown it. but i know it's not about that. my new year's resolution is obviously weight related, but instead of putting a number to it (i want to lose x number of pounds) i just want to make the PERMANENT switch to a raw food diet! i think i might even switch over to veganism, which would make it more officially "raw" than the natalia rose version which allows raw goat cheese and fish. i just have been getting more and more grossed out by seafood, which i've always just ignored bc i "loved" it. we'll see, i think i still like fish and it's good to have SOMETHING to eat at a restaurant you know? tho i guess if i turn vegan, that'll limit what i can eat and therefore allow me to be pickier with a better, more acceptable reason than "i'm not hungry" which obviously calls suspicion and whatnot.
now that i think of it, giving up red meat and poultry was SO easy and i don't even miss it. seriously. but i've always liked being able to say "oh but i eat fish" in like a "oh don't worry, i'm not THAT much of a freak" way or something. i feel like there's something sexy and chic about seafood. like salmon, chilean sea bass, oysters, scallops, sushi...maybe i'm just crazy. yes, i think i will end up going vegan this year. well, i still like my leather but hey baby steps...
back to the denial thing, these past couple of days were supposed to be an opportunity for me to DETOX all the junk i ate in paris (all that BUERRE, omd) out and exercise the fat off so i could go back to school somewhere closer to my normal weight! but what have i been doing instead? pigging out on chips and salsa, cake, cookies...wow. i wake up and quickly put on my huge sweatpants and oversized zip up hoodie, hiding my body from my family and myself, avoiding the mirror and not having to feel a waistband cut into my fat or a shirt creep up my back because it won't stay down over my blub. then i jump under the covers so i don't have to look at my body anymore. i feel like i've had so much trouble getting back into healthy eating habits and exercising because i'm just so discouraged when i wake up in the morning and still look 8 months pregnant. though taking it out by eating certainly isn't helping so NO MORE!!
i've been reading through this blog rawmodelcom.blogspot.com and it's soooo inspirational. the guy who writes it is a model (ovi) and lost the weight to become one by switching to raw! i think the model aspect makes him one of the most inspiring "before/afters" i've seen. i can't wait to get results like his! i like the way he writes bc he's just very nike: just DO IT. like it's so simple and natural to eat this way. and the way he talks about animals being murdered corpses def makes it less appealing to remain just a pesco tarian. and of course, he's gorgeous and it gives me hope that there's a chance i'll find another beautiful raw foodist ;P
sooooo. i don't really have a plan. i think i'm just going to wing it tmrw but ovi keep it vvlight since i have like a HOUSE in my stomach right now. and i def need to work out! i think i need to be an official vegan before i go back to school. yes. most def. mk it's official. i'm a vegan!
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| 145.6 30.8%
sooooo today i officially restart the raw food life force energy diet, aka the final detox bc i never ever want to have to "detox" again. stress can be solved with tea (which i bought a lot of from laduree) and money is better spent on the clothes i'll be able to fit into and look devastating in once i get my body back.
started the day with dry brushing which felt really good so yay. got dressed and feel like a sausage in my spanx tights and tight clothing in general (all my clothes are tight tight tight to begin with...good thing i can still wedge myself into them) had 2 persimmons and resisted the chocolates and macadamias that arrived from harry and david's yesterday.
going downtown for some shopping today and maybe a haircut we'll see. dinner with my ex, have to stick to diet tho! ok off for shopping be back later
edit: mk i'm back and vvfull off from lunch. split a vegan pizza with my sister and split a tub of soy iee cream with sisters on way home. wasn't even hungry for lunch but it was her last meal in chicago so we had to eat. still really full and feeling really fat so not going to eat at the restaurant (going to work soon). can't wait to be skinny again...
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| 144.6 29.8% merrrrrde. really gotta whip myself into shape before i get back to campus! at least i still fit into my pants (i remember several girls complaining about how they couldn't get their pants on/fit into any of their clothes back in paris!) it's just very interesting bc everyone talks about how french women don't get fat and the french paradox of rich foods but tiny waists. so why is it that when a bunch of american students go to france, they end up still gaining not the freshman 15 but the abroad 10? one of my friends offered the possibilty of the fact that the french are used to having such good food around them so to them it's no big deal whereas for us, we've never had such amazing bread so we take advantage of eat by overindulging. i do find this to be true in my case; i found myself rationalizing for my eating with the fact that there is no comparable baguette anywhere in america or that the only macarons that deserve to be called macarons come from laduree in paris. it's just weird bc in america i don't even eat bread but in paris it was a daily necessity. which brings me to the idea of how for the first half of high school i didn't touch anything with milk or wheat/flour in it. aka no bread, pasta, chocolates, cookies, cheese, etc etc. i have to get back into that again, esp since my fave brand of chocolate, endangered species chocolate, doesn't USE milk powder in its dark chocolate so i have no excuse!! though i guess with the raw food detox diet, natalia does really endorse eating raw goat cheeses, which i LOVED in paris so if i can FIND it here in the states (which will be the real challenge) i will def incorporate that into my diet. ahh hol on will finish when i get back
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