wItHeReD_aWaY's Xanga

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Wed, 22 Feb 2006 19:35:25 GMT

Before....

After.

Yeah, so I cut my hair. My Guam Hair. Hahah.
I told you I don't look pretty anymore.
I only look cute now.
So I guess I have to settle for that for a while.

This is like my newest update
Because I went on strike for a while.
But after hearing about Lyn in her e-mail,
I was encouraged to update.
So props for her... and me. ^_^

So school life is more hectic this year.
I know I haven't talked about my classes yet...
So.. here's the boring part about school.

The CNA program this semester made this semester more
"interesting yet intriguing yet hectic"
Basically, just think of detailed and vigorous community service in St. Dominic's.
I've started doing clinical and been actually learning
by working and being assigned to patients.
Pretty scary but educating.
Then you have all these muscle cramp on your legs
and your back at the end of the day.
But I only blame myself.
I now know the importance of Body Mechanics
Haha
Ending here now. Just because I don't think people will even read this usefull nonsense.
Kisses...in French

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Sun, 22 Jan 2006 01:53:02 GMT

School starts in two days.
I'm hella-anxious.
Can't wait to get out of the house.

Going out of my mind
for missing everyone
so god damn much.

One evening:
He: Do you know the muffin man?
She: Yes, I know the muffin man. He lives in Drury Lane
He: Oh, well in that case, he has a message for you.
She: Really?... And what might that be?
He: "I love you."

One morning:
He: in a sing-song voice* I have a girl friend.
She: whispers while hugging him* ...and she loves you.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Fri, 13 Jan 2006 02:46:22 GMT

Things everyone has to learn before they die...

1. It doesn't matter to everyone if you can't dance well. Just Dance.
2. You should never confuse your career with your life
3. You will NEVER find anybody who can give a clear reason why we observe daylight savings time.
4. Your friends love you anyway.
5. Once you love someone, even though through time, that love will change a bit or increase/decrease, you will always love that person.

...and here endeth the lesson.

So here's the unimportant stuff. Haha.
Finally got my Nevada liscence
... it's actually by luck.
I took the written test without studyin
and I passed borderline.

School starts in a week.
It's kind of hectic with the CNA program.
Gotta run around town to do all the stuff required of me
Uniforms, CPR certification, vaccination, drug test, skin test
blah blah blah...

I finally touched my scrapbook again.
after so long.
... went to Micheal's and bought stuff for it
I could never stress this enough
Micheal's is damn expensive
...after a while at least.

So how's me?
2 words: Emotionally disfunctional
My current situation sucks.
Mom, Haezel and Don gone... far far away.
...but at least I still have Ro who checks up on me
so often like everyday-ish. ^_^
but I'm surviving. Life's just a damn peach.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Thu, 05 Jan 2006 23:27:33 GMT

Finally... an update.
Trip to San Diego rocked.
Got to see Ro and Ricky and Don again
yay \o/

I now think there's actually something in Starbuck's for me
I got to see the pacific ocean again|
only this time, it's colder.
We walked around a man-made lake
We went to a Japanese garden
We got to visit Alex
We got to kick back with Von
and he turns out to be "acquanted" with my boyfriend.

Since I got back,
nothing's ever been the same
I could say that going there changed me
and had a major effect in my life.
It's really great...
recieving the gift of a second chance
Thank you

Also, my mom and Haezel is now back on Guam.
Don's back in South Carolina
I realize that I'm going to have
to learn to be independent. For reals.
I moved back into the old room I had
before my mom and Haezel was here.
Just started settling in and my closet's a mess.

I'll post up some pictures later.
I'm too lazy. All for now.

Looking Back Once More

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 00:35:21 GMT

1) Was 2005 a good year for you?
One of the better ones

2) What was your favorite moment of the year?
when new people entered my life and played important roles in it.

3) What was your least favorite moment of the year?
-at one point, the BevRoJen became a Bev    Ro     Jen.
-when my world began to crumble
-when I left the only world I've ever know.

4) Where were you when 2005 began?
...on my bed- asleep. Or i think i was grating coconuts

5) Who were you with?
my stuffed animals

6) Where will you be when 2005 ends?
San Diego

7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends?
possibly with Don, Ro and Rick.

8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2005?
... somewhat. I actually worked it during the middle of the year.

9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2006?
     Yes, lose weight. Oh and get an A at least in ONE of my classes.

10) Did you fall in love in 2005?
    ...I'm getting there

11) If yes, with who?
take a wild guess

12) If yes, do they know?
i'm hoping they will when i do

13) Are you still in love with them?
...you assume like I said "yes" on #10

14) You regret it?
I don't think I will. But I hope I won't.

15) Did you breakup with anyone in 2005?
er...no.

16) Did you make any new friends in 2005?
yeah. I bring out my "people person" sometimes

17) Who are your favorite new friends?
-Annette who shared a similar intrest in Buffy with me... and is somewhat the new and improved version of me. The bitch. The slut. only smarter and cuter.
-The rest of the "Juniors" who are now seniors in Sanchez
-Rox and the trig study buddies who helped me pass
-Amaranth who shared her sandwhiches and the juniors from anatomy
-The Oedipus at Colonus group. You guys seriously rocked. Even though we worked within the boundaries of time limits and the unbearable hot "shooting set"

18) What was your favorite month of 2005?
June

19) Did you travel outside of the US in 2005?
...Okay, I left Guam. Went to PI and I finally arrived ON the US

20) How many different states have you traveled in 2005?
3... Nevada, California, Arizona. My neighbors. Haha

21) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?
Yeah. It was something I've never experienced before.

22) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
Yeah. But I miss more people this year. Homesickness season.

23) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005?
I don't know about favorite but memorable, it was the last movie I ever watched on Guam. `Cause Charles and I were the only ones yelling throughout the previews.

24) What was your favorite song from 2005?
The Best out of my favorites... "Hollaback Girl" - Gwen Stefani. Why? Lots of memories.

25) What was your favorite record from 2005?
You mean CD's? Phantom of the Opera Soundtrack.

26) How many concerts did you see in 2005?
Three major boring ones. My music class required for me to see.

27) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005?
Out of the three... The most entertaining, the "Holiday Concert." Chrismas songs (common and classics) played only in guitars.

28) Did you drink a lot of alchohol in 2005?
Oh... FCUK. YEAH.

29) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005?
well...er... *blush* not a lot. Just once. pot.

30) How many people did you sleep with in 2005?
around.. ten or more.

31) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
Somehow ashamed. But mostly regretting.

33) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005?
"I'm just joking."

34) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005?
Yeah. I was like bitch of the hallway. Bitch of the circle. Bitch of the everything. and everywhere.

35) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005?
Yeah and it changed a major aspect in my life.

36) How much money did you spend in 2005?
a lot.

37) What was your proudest moment of 2005?
Well I'd first say Graduating from High school... but then, I actually cried in front of Mr. Hu when I found out I just passed his class. Thus, graduation here I come.

38) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005?
My period actually leaked through my skirt on the 2nd day of college life. And I walked to and out of my last class not knowing about it.

39) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 what would it be?
No, no going back. It'll change the its ripple effects of the now.

40) What are your plans for 2006?
Become a CNA. Start saving money. Learn how to be somewhat independent. Get good grades so I can get into the Limited-entry Radiation Therapy program.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Sat, 17 Dec 2005 18:34:18 GMT

I feel so tired
....So tired of crying.

So my mom took off with my cell phone
and brought it with my sister to Montana
And so what does that leave me with?
...Just me.
Not even a connection to the world
outside my house.

I locked mysef in my room today
and my mind got busy
...thinking and thinking
and thinking.
and I've thought...

Since I'm going finally be on my own
in this place away from home
with strange people
...what if I get used to it?
Won't it make me less human?
The part about being used to it
and being able to live?

Getting used to being away
... does that mean I can live without you?

By the way, Buffy Season 6 rocks.
I finally own it.
<3 Bev

Friday, December 02, 2005

Fri, 02 Dec 2005 01:42:42 GMT

My past experience in the past few days
have come to make me realize that
CCSN is has some crazy students.

Wednesday, I sat on a bench outside
as I waited for my cousin to come out of class.
Some guy walking and talking... unusually
came up to me and said straight out
Excuse me, can I hug you?
You guys will be suprised
at how well I handled the situation.
NO! I wans't a bitch who yelled out
FUCK NO! I WOULDN'T EVEN TOUCH YOU
WITH A TEN FEET POLE!!!
I said: "No, it's okay..."
With determination.

Thinking he just walked away,
he actually walked around the area of trees
and headed straight back my way
I grabbed my shit and walked as fast as I can
into the building or as near as I can get
to the group of boys
were I not able to make it inside.

.~*`[[[ I fell into my thoughts of A.D.D. today.
Tears etching their way through my eyes
Brought me back to reality.
Since you left,
My life's been a routine.
Hurry and return to put the
rainbow back into my world.
I miss you,
<3 Your Cinderella ]]]`*~.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Mon, 28 Nov 2005 02:06:07 GMT

MySpace sucks.
MySpace sucks. Yup, you heard me. Loud and clear.

To me, it looks like MyS***, or MyStuff. Possessions, not people, are depicted. This is one of the most annoying site to customize, because of the endless flow of comments (usually rude), nasty images of dandruffy heads and photos of angels, well, who don't have wings (duh). Secondly, some pictures are so disgusting that I feel like vomiting on my keyboard. People lie about their ages too, such as that 35 year-old ugly woman who claims to be 27 and that homeless man from Utah who claims to have an annual six-digit salary. It's tearing up peoples' lives. Haha, losers.

There is one particular reason why I hate MySpace. If you want to find out, read Eats, Shoots & Leaves by Lynne Truss.

- Directly Quoted from add_ons

So I repeat....

MySpace sucks.
AND I AGREE. I WILL NEVER CONFORM TO MYSPACE!!!

Monday, September 12, 2005

Mon, 12 Sep 2005 22:24:01 GMT

How do I feel roday? If only extraordinary love would be enough...

Something that I miss... Angry Little Girls comic strips. I haven't looked at those since the beginning of senior year. I remember them only now because I want an Angry Little Girl mouse pad. And I'm going to get one online with my mom's credit card. It's the only way I can use her credit card because they can't check for identification. ^_^
Btw, Jen, I did get that wireless mouse. That's why I need a mouse pad. Haha.

The weather in Vegas is cooling down now. The days can sometimes feel like dawn on Guam. Sometimes, its even a little bit cooler than that over here.

This blog today, is going to be short because I should be spending my time reading some of my books. Because... I have to be committed. And I can be. But sometimes it's so hard. So much temptation. Haha. But then I'm just beginning to climb what I call "The Ladder of Success." I'm not even on the first step yet. But look in your 2005 SSHS yearbooks. Remember my senior quote? When on the ladder of succes, don't make boys look up your dress. I used to laugh at it because literally, the quote is so me. I guess now, it just has a deeper meaning for me. I'm trying to be a prude now, remember? ( !_! )

I might come back to Guam. I'm seriously considering changing my major. Out of the blue, my love for reading is moving me towards an english major. I've never thought twice about becoming a teacher. But what can one do with an English major other than teach english? Fuck....Eww, now that I think about it, I'm going to be like Ms. Terbio? Only less of a coffee junkie.

Buffy: I love you.
Spike: No you don't. But thanks for saying it anyway.
- The last episode of Season seven. ~~When Spike dies.~~.
Damn, I miss Buffy too. I don't watch it over here. I don't know when it shows and what channel. Oh yeah, Season seven went down to $48 from $60. Amazon.

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Sun, 04 Sep 2005 05:27:56 GMT

How do I feel today? You took me to the point of no return.

SPIKE: I wasn't planning on hurting you... Much.
BUFFY: You haven't even come close to hurting me.
SPIKE: Afraid to give me the chance?

This risk I took-
you don't know how scary it is for me
but I took it.
I only have one heart
so do not break it.
<3 Your Cinderella

Tomorrow is the last day of the longest summer of my life.
Thank you Rea, my confidante
for encouraging me to be strong
and supporting me
in doing what I have to do
to reach my dreams.
Oh... and for your html help! ^_^

BUFFY: Your job is to kill the slayer.
But all you can do is follow me around making moon eyes.
SPIKE: I'm in love with you.
BUFFY: You're in love with pain. Admit it.
You like me ... because you enjoy getting beat down.
So really, who's screwed up?
SPIKE: Hello! Vampire!
***Followed by the most passionate make-out session. ever.
**If memory serves me right...they also have sex the first time.
- Smashed. Season 6