wadda_MILF's Xanga

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Thu, 01 Dec 2005 22:29:34 GMT

yea so .. its been a minute, haha! a little mad right now, so Ashley called me and asked me if i would come in bc she didnt feel good n wanted to go home so i went into work .. and she called this other person and next thing u know they come .. and i am already clocked in and everything, i was pissed!! also pissed bc the fuckin picture place in walmart is fucking me round .. we went and got Jr.s xmas pictures done .. and i was suppose to have them by now .. uh imma go and rase hell, lol!!! but yea... nothing has really been happening, just getting ready for the holidays .. cant wait till xmas! aww we got this oh so cute little santa outfit for Jr. aww hes gonna look soooo cute! omg its gonna be a bussy day tho, so many places to go! speaking of work and xmas .. imma be pissed if i work .. bc the one store i always work weekends in the morning .. and if i work in the morning ill be good .. but if its after 12 i wont fuckin work .. i dont see why she cant get sumone else .. shes so fuckin over staff and outta all fuckin people she picks ME! jsut like on turkey day i had to work .. kinda pissed me off a lil! but if i do work ill tell her i cant work .. and if she say i got to then i wont go in, and if i get fired i get fired .. im lookin for another job anyways .. but yea!

Update on Jr. .... well, he can crawl but he rather roll, haha, and he is standing on his feet well, like he will hold on to the couch and kinda walk along it, gosh and hes getting so big :), and he wants to talk so bad but cant, i know he really wants to lol!! hes just such a happy baby, and i love it!! spoiled tho, lol!

Update on Big alan and i .. we are doing GREAT .. hopefully after xmas .. we are gonna start to make a move or sumin .. i really hope we do, i kinda wanna get out on my fuckin own, ya kno??

Well imma get going .. i gotta get doin school work .. or imma fail, i have to have soo much shit made up by the 12 its crazy i got sum all nighters to pull which i can do .. but damn its gonna catch up to me reallllll fuckin bad and imma end up sleepin for lik a week straight haha .. its happened b4, its crazy shit yo! but yea..

ROXIE .. DONT WORRIE ERRYTHING WILL BE AIGHT AND I AM HERE .. WHATEVER IT IS YOU NEED .. EVEN IF I AINT GOT IT I WILL GET IT AND GIVE IT TO YOU! LOVE YOU BABY!!1 <333

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Tue, 08 Nov 2005 23:17:39 GMT

yea i think its time for an update .. well things have been soo fuckin shitty .. i honestly dont know what to do anymore. i just feel like giving up but i cant, i just fuckin cant... and i hate the fact that im such a fucking caring person.. i fuckin hate it .. thats the shit that make me more upset anymore .. just nothing is right .. everytimetime somthing GOOD happens sumin BAD ALWAYS has to happen to fuck it up!!!! :( Sometimes i just REALLLLLLLLLLLLLY wish i was just a lil kid again .. i always end up holding all my fuckin feelings inside and it makes me go insane .. and i just have such a HORRIBLE attitude anymore .. and i take all my anger out on everyone that i shouldnt be takin it out on ... and that makes me feel even more horrible. hell the other day i swear i was having a stress attack .. but i didnt do anything about it .. it hurt sooo fuckin bad. UH I JUST DONT FUCKIN KNOW ANYMORE! i dont think my life is EVER i mean NEVER gonna go good. i think i cursed .. i have NO ONE to talk to really .. and that is also what is really killing me.

ill stop talkin bout my problems and get on a betta note ...

Jr. is crawling now :) i am sooooo happy! but he is terrorizing(sp) the house haha .. he likes to pull the carpet, lol its so cute tho. but he is gettin really big:) .. also i got a kitten :) so happy ... she looks just like angel :):):) .. and this weekend .. i got to see kristi in like 73497398743274 years! aww im jealous of her house .. it is sooo beautiful!!! but i missed her alot .. we caught up on sum shit .. i miss her alot!! but yea .. theres not much good stuff happenin in my life lately .. so imma go .. i got alotta shit i need to do .. and its 11 but oh well .. i just feel that like one of these days everything is just gonna kill me .. im not gonna be able to take it anymore ...

wish i could run away from it all, but i cant .. i just gotta try and keep my head up and stay strong for my son :)

</3

Saturday, October 15, 2005

Sat, 15 Oct 2005 23:51:58 GMT

heres a few songs tellin how i been feeling lately .. i have no body to talk to anymore .. i dont talk to my 2 bestest Roxie and Kristi anymore .. i miss them .. im tiered of always holding my feelings and pain i all the time .. and im tiered of crying .. when am i gonna accually be able to be happy again? the only thing that makes me smile is my son .. and i thank the lord everyday for him .. bc is he wasnt here today .. who knows wat trouble id be in .. or if i would still be alive or not .. hell i miss everyone i feel so left out anymore .,. and it hurts so bad to not talk to my friends i miss them all .. roxie kristi jessica kristen ali rissa megan jes jess crystal jackie and so many more .. the other day when i was at my dads .. i was lookin threw old pics when i was growing up .. it hurt so bad knowing that all that has changed and those times ill never have back .. imma just name sum songs .. if ya bored look up the lyrics or unless u already know the song .. but these are the feelings i have anymore ..

Simple Plan- Welcome yo my life

Smile Empty Soul- Bottom of a bottle

Smile Empty SOul- Silhouettes

Smile Empty Soul- With this knife

Vivian Green- Wish we could go back

----theres more i will put on here then .. i just wanna go and get a bath .. i might finish it up tonight .. depends i got work in the morning .. so byes </3

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Wed, 12 Oct 2005 16:44:23 GMT

DAMN! Its been a minute, but yea .. things have been crazy lately and reallly bussy! Well first off i wanna say HAPPY BIRTHDAY RJ <33333333333! Today is my bros bday!!! Well i got another job, so i am curently workin 2 jobs .. in schoool...and takin care of my beautiful son<33!! So for alla them jealous girls out there just flappin their jaws can stick it up their asses bc it aint affecting me at all! But on another note .. not everything has been going to good .. i gotta get outta my moms house .. there is just toooooo many fuckin people here .. and im sick and tiered of my shit gettin stolen and what not .. imma bout to knock sum lil girl out, lol! Alan has been at my dads for the last 2 weeks working wit him .. My brother hasnt been doing to good .. he keeps gettin in trouble and he has to go to court i think next week... there going to do sumin where like no alla the trouble he got into DOES NOT come off his record .. and if he has to go to court after that they are gonna take him and place him they say! And Rj can not quite smokin and thats whats prob gonna end up doing it for him .. he already admitted to his PO twice that he has ... so that he wouldnt fail his piss test! And carlisle keeps kickin him out, he got kicked out 2 times already this year, so hes prob going into PDELA .. which that is what i am in, that would help him out a bunch! Just HOPEFULLY carlisle dont fuck him over like they did me, WHICH we might sue carlisle now .. GOSH, i hope we do! Haha speakin of sueing schoools, my mom can go after CV, but anyways!! AND MY GRANDPARENTS ARE STILL FUCKIN SUPER DUPER GAY anymore!! Oh for Halloween .. the little one ig going as Tigger, that is IF we can find sumin that fits him .. if not i got another idea, tehe! Cant wait till he has his firs Halloween <33!! Ahh he will be 8 months on the 16, i am so happy, my baby is gettin big and healthy! Well folks ima bounce i got school work to do, WHICH i am doing horrible in Science reallllllllly bad!!

<3autz ..

Monday, September 05, 2005

Mon, 05 Sep 2005 15:54:58 GMT

Man, its been awhile. Anyways .. sheesh, nothing is the same anymore .. i miss the way things were, everytime i think bout my past, it makes me cry, i want things the way they were. Ever since i had alan, nothing has been going right, i love my son so very much, there nothing in this world i wouldnt do for him. I just wish things would go easy, and good for me for ONCE in my life, but i dont think thats ever happening. I have no one to talk to anymore, and some times its hard for me to talk to big alan, i barely talk to roxie anymore, and i dont even talk to kristi really. I miss my friends, my dad, my brother, and my cat, and halo. I feel like everything bad thats been happening anymore is my fault. I honestly cant remember when ive been accually happy. my family think im still going threw Post Partum (sp), but i know im not, its just i have alot on my mind anymore, i dont know wat to do. for my fuckin schooling, i dont know whats gonna happen really, im sayin carlisle fucked me over big time, bc of them i had to re-do all the shit i did in carlisle in my school now, and i am doing my 2nd half of 10th grade, im not in 11th yet and i am suppose to be, and it pisses me off, im not gonna grad wit my class, and if i dont i will be fuckin pissed! work is just sucking anymore, i need to go out and get another one, but i put apps. in and then i get nothing back. i miss knowin wat goes on with my dad and my brother anymore, its like im in the dark, and i hate it. imma go, i just cant update anymore, it hurts late </3

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Tue, 26 Jul 2005 23:07:27 GMT

whats good? wooow its been a minute since i wrote in this shit, haha i just aint got the damn time no more. anyways .. shit has been good .. i just got back from the hossy .. bc i am VERY VERY sick .. my grandparents got Jr<3 .. bc i am sick, and daddy is at work. This saturday we are all goin to Hershey Park .. and then sum time after that Alan is gonna prob get tickets from his friend so that just us can go. This whole week ive been feeling like shit .. the begining of the week i went and got my BC Shot since i am changing my BC ... i felt like some major shit then .. and at Doms this weekend, being down in his room all weekend in the cold .. and all the muggy shit, gave me this cold :(:(! This weekend was fun tho .. and very funny, and bussy! SO many beautiful bikes tho! <333 On the in like 2 weekends Alan and i are goin to Kanobles wwit my dad and family friends .. it should be fun!! Oh yea, o also hear sum very disturbing shit this weekend, but on a good note .. Kim had her baby :) .. well imma go and get my project done .. ill write in dis shit when i get a chance to!

Peace!

Saturday, July 02, 2005

Sat, 02 Jul 2005 22:25:15 GMT

today at work i fucked up my knee sum how .. it really hurts, i dont kno why! But anyways .. tomorro is da family picnic .. i gotta get up EARLY in da morning, and i cant go to sleep right now BLAH! Sumtime dis week when i go to carlisle .. im callin Christin i-thought-i-saw-sum-toes up, and we are gonna meet wether she wants to or not, im tiered of her ass talkin shit. if she dont meet me, hell ill go to hte bitches house, and she can have who ever she fuckin wants .. bc i know they wont jump in and it would just show me how much more of a pussy she is! but anyways ..i gotta work tomorro at 4 .. what fun right, lol! well imma go n try to get sum shut eye .. peace!

oh heres a lil sirvey , i got bored lol ...

General:
[First Name]: Autumn
[Hair Color]:Brown .. looks red sumtime
[Last Name]: Honick
[Hair Style]:straight
[Eye Color]:brown
[Height]:umm .. 5'5
[Location]: middletown/ carlisle
[Birthday]:3/22/89
[Zodiac Sign]: aries
[Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend]: yesssssum .. and i love him muchos<333
[Do you have a crush?]

Favorite:
[Favorite Animal]: cat <3 // R.I.P angel
[Favorite Sport(s)]: boxing
[Favorite Color(s)]: blue
[Favorite Movie]: theres a few
[Favorite Store(s)]: theres a few
[Favorite Feeling]: happy
[Favorite Shoe]: flip flops
[Favorite Scent]: candies

Misc.:
[Do You Wear Make-Up]: yes
[Which is more important, personality or looks]: personality
[What kind of personality do you like in a guy/girl]: a GREAT one
[What is your idea of the perfect guy/girl]: someone who is always there, caring, honest, loving, ect.
[Would you ever ask someone out]: yea
[Do you prefer blondes or brunettes]: dont matter

Love, Life & Friends:
[What is the first thing you notice about someone]: eyes
[When’s the last time you cried]: yesturday
[What do you want to be when you grow up]: i wanna go to the air force to become a detective
[Do you sleep with stuffed animals]: yes i do<3
[Do you want children]: already got one .. who i love so veyr much <3, but yea i want a girl in the future <3
[How far have you gotten]: all the way home baby, lol
[Do you like someone right now]:yuppers
[Do they know]: sure do
[Do you have a best friend]: yesssum .. my boyfriend, my son, and roxie <33

Within the last 24 hours, have you…:
[Hugged someone]: yup
[Kissed someone]: yup
[Gotten along well with your parents]: yea .. guess if u say so
[Fought with a friend]:no

Do you like to...:
[Give hugs]: depends to who
[Give back rubs]: depends to who and if i get one :)
[Take walks in the rain]: yeaa
[You ever have that falling dream]: yea
[What is on the walls of your room]: um .. pictures
[When you chew gum, what kind]: extra

In the last 2 months have/did you...:
[Made Out]: yea
[Go on a date]:yea
[Go to the movies]:nope
[Go to the mall]:yea
[Eaten an entire box of Oreos]: no
[Eaten sushi]: hell no
[Been on stage]:nope
[Been dumped]: nope
[Had someone be unfaithful to you]: yea
[Watched The Smurfs]: no
[Hiked a mountain]:nope
[Made homemade cookies]: nope
[Been in love]: sure have and still am. and always will be <333

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Thu, 23 Jun 2005 19:03:31 GMT

was gooooooooooood? nothing chillin here .. just takin a lil break from my schooling lol! god i fuckin hate carlisle .. i just found out why i am redoin alla the shit i already did when i was there .. bc when i signed outta that school they didnt give me any fuckin credits! aint that sum fucked up shit?? god shit pisses me off .. so yup .. imma be doing school all summer .. feels like im in summer school or sumin, sheesh! anyways .. shit has been going better then wat they were i guess.

Alan and my dad get along now :):):):):) and my dad said that he wants Alan and i to get a place and then do what we gotta do! And he is gonna help us! but right now we are just tryna get threw this court shit. which is fuckin dumb .. and people are so fuckin immature i swear, lol!

Saturday .. the alans and i are going to either the hummelstown or highspire fair?

June 30th i have to have the first part of my classes done .. well no later then then july 9th, but tryna have it done by the 30th.

July 3rd family picnic :)

July 6 court for stupid shit

prob the second weekend of july going to hershey park :)

July 16 lil alan will be 5 months :):)

yea thats just a lil of what il be doing :)

roxie is in florida .. the days are so nasty out that she aint here :( lol .. but no for real .. i do miss her! I hope she is having fun and everything is ok :) Yo tell me why the other day at work i got stung by a fuckin bee .. yo my arm fuckin hurts so bad .. god, imma cry :( tears lol!

yes this wasnt much .. but honestly i hate updating at times lol! but yea anyways .. stupid bitches really do piss me off and im done wit her stupid ass bullshit. but anyways imma out! PEACE!

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Tue, 07 Jun 2005 16:01:03 GMT

bold all that apply

01. I like the color of healthy grass.
02. Winter sucks.
03. I need a job.
04. I hate stupid bitches.
05. I dance. A lot.
06. None of my body is double jointed.
07. I stay up late.
08. Watching young people get physically hurt by accident (ex. tripping, slipping) makes me laugh as long as they're ok.
09. I love the beach.
10. I've only had Chinese food twice.
11. Jumping on bubble wrap is a favorite pasttime of mine.
12. Harry Potter is excellent.
13. I miss my long hair, even though I seem to look much better without it.
14. I get poison ivy all the time.
15. I sometimes make up ridiculous songs with my friends.
16. I love pajama pants.
17. I am attracted to boys with shaggy or curly hair.
18. I have a tattoo.
19. I hate crying in public.
20. I want to visit Las Vegas.
21. I love music.
22. I could spend the rest of my life reading.
23. Strawberries are awesome.
24. I love Harry Potter.
25. My friends are neat people.
26. I would like to visit New Mexico.
27. Pets rule too.
28. I dislike prejudice.
29. I hate hearing ignorant people talk.
30. The internet clears my boredom
31. I play lots of video games.
32. I like to read past xanga entries.
33. I am quiet sometimes.
34. I love 80's teen movies.
35. I love my friends.
36. 'I Love the 80's' was a very informative show.
37. I think stripes are spiffy.
38. My dad has a secret fan club which consists of most my female friends.
39. I do a lot of surveys.
40. I am strange.
41. Vegetables are gross.
42. I wish people knew just how much they meant to me.
43. Kissing is a very strange (but delightful) concept.
44. Justin Timberlake roolz.
45. People should stop saying, "I'll be there" if they know they can't.
46. I hate being sick.
47. I really like chocolate.
48. I like looking at photography.
49. I enjoy watching and listening to lightning storms.
50. I apparently do not get enough sleep.
51. The smell of Subway sandwiches makes me want to vomit.
52. I love clothes.
53. I hated elementary school.
55. I am mature enough to be immature at the right time.
56. TV rots your brain.
57. Valentine's Day is a pointless holiday.
58. Adoption is awesome!
59. I wish I hung out with all my friends, more.
60. Nice people are underappreciated.
61. School is one big joke.
62. I love kisses. Especially Hershey's chocolate.
63. Morons are sometimes enteraining.
64. My friends are very interesting.
65. J.Lo is totally hott.
66. Cartoons annoy me, but animated sitcoms are alright sometimes.
67. Comfortable can still look good.
68. My hair is fried.
69. I volunteer at an animal shelter.
70. I can't spel.
71. Grilled cheese = best ever.
72. Pirates are sexy for the most part.
73. Cover bands are annoying.
74. I don't like wearing shoes.
75. I never make New Year's resolutions.
76. Chocolates are so yummy.
77. I wish this town didn't suck.
78. My friends say I'm crazy.
79. Sometimes I think it would be fun to be shipwrecked on an island.
80. I space out a lot.
81. I am a big klutz some of the time.
82. Sometimes i wish my brain would just shut up.
83. I wish people would stop saying our generation is "going nowhere."
84. I am a very big procrastinator.
85. I want to live in a big city.
86. I am picky about my hair.
87. I am silly.
88. I gave and received many excellent Christmas presents.
89. Small talk bothers me.
90. I own a mood ring that only turns about 3 different colors.
91. I love lip gloss.
92. I throw like a girl.
93. My family is extremely dysfunctional
94. I hate shopping.
95. I hate art.
96. I was once electrical-taped to a big tree.
97. My skin is really dry in the winter.
98. I am a bit too blunt sometimes.
99. I want to attend college out of state.
100. I love smoking and driving.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Tue, 07 Jun 2005 14:22:54 GMT

Bold the ones that apply

01. My hair is still its natural color
02. I paint my toe nails
03. I get annoyed when i don't get to finish telling a story
04. I like to wear pink
05. Sometimes I wish I could do something really, really amazingly well
06. I drink a lot of water
07. I've never taken a hit of a cigarette
08. I love fat people!
09. I'm such a health freak
10. I love taking pictures
11. I have really tiny wrists
12. I can identify some close friends by smell
13. I'm far too nice
14. I hate when people confuse "your" and "you're"
15. I think dorkiness is attractive
16. I've never had a fake screen name
17. I wish I had a pug
18. I miss middle school
19. I have pretty good eating habits
20. I have a hard time making up my mind sometimes
21. I wish my hair naturally curled
22. I can't live without chapstick
23. I wish I could sing
24. I like classical music
25. Striped pants are hot
26. I think Schylar is a really cool name
27. I usually don't get sarcasm
28. I wish I could look in a mirror and constantly be satisfied with myself
29. I shift between being sleepy and awake when I'm really tired
30. I hardly ever vaccuum
31. I hate racism and nazi's
32. I want him to hold me
33. I like watermelon flavored things
34. I'm a snob about grammar ((0nli wen ppl tlk lyk this))
35. I am a terrible liar
36. Old Spice deoderant smells WONDERFUL
37. I wish I knew how to speak in Italian
38. This "100 things about myself" list is harder than it looks
39. I am learning to be happy wherever I am
40. I have no idea what my school musical is about
41. I appreciate honesty
42. I need a manicure
43. I love Dr.Pepper
44. I twirl my hair
45. I love kissing
46. I don't own a cellphone
47. I want to learn to play harp
48. I'm not old enough to vote
49. I live in the past far too much
50. I need to remember to be a teenager sometimes
51. I want to see most of the world
52. Sometimes I wonder what's going on over in London
53. I hate being lied to
54. I believe in a thing called love
55. I go shopping usually once a week
56. Today is Wednesday
57. I've read more than 100 books
58. I hate hearing songs that sacrifice meaning for the sake of being able to rhyme
59. I like feet
60. I like getting compliments
61. I want the world to see me
62. I think it's funny when girls wear so much makeup that their faces become incandescent
63. I hate seeing kids/people that think they're different because they like Slipknot, etc. and shop at Hot Topic
64. I have a fear of wearing too much perfume
65. I wear pants more than I wear shorts
66. I am tactful most of the time
67. I'm afraid of spiders
68. I get too attached to some people
69. I'm usually on time
70. I forgive but I don't forget
71. I think way too damn much for my own good
72. My current relationship is teaching me a lot
73. I like salads from McDonalds
74. I read for at least an hour every night before bed
75. I talk to a lot of people I don't like because I hate being rude
76. I sing in the shower
77. Laughing turns me on
78. I wish I were asleep
79. I love reeses peanutbutter cups
80. I never have enough energy to do what I'm doing
81. I have a friend who has an outtie bellybutton...
82. I have driven a car
83. There is no nailpolish on my nails
84. I am unafraid to change, but I don't think I realize the boundary between change and utter transformation
85. I wear brown, thin-rimmed glasses
86. Goodbyes make me sad
87. 5.6.7.8 comes after 1.2.3.4.
88. I love cuddling
89. I run when I'm bored
90. I wish I were more attractive to others
91. I worry too much sometimes about what people think
93. Compliments make me happy
94. I like long car rides with certain people
95. I drink a lot of orange juice in the morning
96. I wonder a lot who I'm going to end up marrying
97. I listen to the things no one else really cares about
98. I can draw from imaginiation
99. TyPiNg LIeK diS anNoyes [the hell out of] mEeeh
100. This took too long