ugh i feel like crap...and i have no idea why
and it wouldnt be driving me insane if i only knew why i was so down..

i want to leave somewhere
go see the grand canyon...
hitch a ride to nowhere with no plans

just leave...

i hate this feeling....like you have no one...i want a shoulder to lean on.

why am i so scared
i torture myself so that no one else could ever hurt me

but its 1000x worse.

my head is throbbing. i feel like i have a lump in my throat. im such an idiot

man oh man i hate summer...i wish it were fall
fall is pretty and it has warm days and cool nights PERFECT!

ugh so my parents just broke the news to me that im going on vacatin for 11 days...kill me

4 days in virgina beach

and....

7 day in myrtle

I DONT WANT TO GO!!

i mean honestly i already had to suffer missing my amazing boyfriend for 10 days just last sunday and now i have to do it again....

i dont even like the beach..
this summer hasnt been all i epected it to be...i thought summer was supposed to be constant fun and all that jazz instead its been really slow..oh well schools starting soon i cant wait im actually really looking forward to school starting i mean i had a great freshman year so i have alot to look forward to (ehem seeing justiin like inbetween classes 5/7 days ^_^)  plus at least there was always something to do on school days....school

anyways this has been a long enough entry i suppose....more later i guess

((i love Justin sooo damn much, hes my world))

*yawn* hey guys just woke up feeling kinda tired....i was up till like 1:20 talking with Rj so i went to the carnival yesterday in havre de grace to see fireworks with justin that was fun im like in love with those fireworks that are gold and they sort of just rain down like glitter  they were the best. oh and cotton candy of course i mean really does it get any better?!

so i was going to be healthy and make myself a great breakfast made consisting of eggs and bacon and a glass of milk but instead i found the brownies i made yesterday so those and a glass of milk will be perfect

To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides.
       - David Viscott

so first off let me just say that boring friday nights suck.
every morning its the same old story i convince myself that im going to do something fun so i take a long shower and spend an hour making myself look cute and then later on nothing happens and nobody can do anything...killer....

anyways my brothers graduation party is tomorrow so that should be pretty fun i guess i mean theres a 70% chance of rain but whatever ill be in my room anyways...

next thing is...i miss justin soooo soooo so much..
havent seen him since monday....

no fun

anyways i know nobody reads this but whatever...i <3 xanga