Good boy birthday present ideas?

nothing too weird...but nothing too expensive either. thanks, loves  <33

Dear My One and Only,

Times are rough lately, huh? I mean, at least, for me they are. It's funny. I've always thought I knew who you were. Sometimes I still think I do. But I know that whoever you are, I already love you with all my heart. You are my everything, and if we don't know each other yet, then don't worry. We will. You are so beautiful to me. I hope you're someone who I already know. Someone that I trust and care about greatly right now. But if you're not, then I promise we'll meet each other. And when we do, God's gonna tell me. He's gonna tell me "Yeah. That's him. That's the guy." and I'll know. It'll be instant for me. Just like it was this time. Who knows. Maybe it'll be instant every time. Maybe it won't. Maybe I'll go through life having relationships thinking that they'll last, and then getting heartbroken. Or maybe not. Maybe you're sitting at home right now knowing that you're the one for me. And I'm the one for you.

Wherever you are, just know we'll make it. You and me. Life gets tough and people change all the time. But you and I will never change. I will never change, unless God wants me to. We're gonna make it because of him. Live your life for him and give it everything you've got, and you'll get through. Just remember that. Because I don't know what I'll do without you one day. I love you with all my heart already.

I can't wait to see you, baby.


<3 All my love..forever. <3

I hate this. I'm done with this xanga. I'm done with all xangas, probably.

So everyone's filled in, I don't have a good life right now. I'm not going into specifics, but I really need your prayers. My parents and I are having a really rough time..and God's the only thing that is really gonna fix this.

sorry, all. it was nice while it lasted.

2 hour delays make everything alright.

everyone remember that song "I hate everything about you"?? That everyone like either loved or hated, and it was such a weird song? Yeh, well my friend made me a cd and that's on it. And this whole paragraph has absolutely no point.

i am so bored.

but God is really really awesome

And you promise me that you believe
In time I will defeat this
Cause somewhere in me, there is strength

And today I will trust you with the confidence
Of a man who's never known defeat
And I'll try my best to just forget that man isn't me
Reach out to me, make my heart brand new
Ever beat will be for You...for You

And you said, 'I know that this will hurt
But if I don't break your heart
Then things will just get worse.'
If the burden seems too much to bear
Remember the end will justify
The pain it took to get us there

I am so sick of life. I can't take this. I honestly cannot stand the pressures I have on me right now. My parents, my school, my friends. They're all watching me like I'm the President or something -- waiting for me to fail. I know it. I can feel it. And every wrong I do is a massive deal. I'm just trying to live my life and I cant. Because if I mess up, then I'm not only dissappointed in myself, but everyone else is dissappointed in me. I'M NOT PERFECT. I'm sick and tired of trying to be something that I'm not. I can't please everyone and I'm tired of trying. I can't be your friend all the time. I just can't. I'm not able to make you happy every second of the day. I'm sorry if I hurt you -- but you know you can't put so much pressure on me to be perfect. Cause I'm not. If you want someone perfect, then look elsewhere. Cause looking at me won't do you any good anymore.

I'm done being what everyone wants. For once I want to be what I want. I want to give my life to God --

i cant even finish writing this. because i feel like im just saying this. I KNOW IM JUST SAYING THIS. tomorrow will be the same as today and yesturday and even the day before. imma let people walk all over me. imma try and please everyone. and it sucks.

i am so dissappointed in myself. because im not what you want. and im not what i want. and im not what God wants me to be. He wants better of me. He deserves better of me.


What happened to us?
I heard it's me we should blame
What happened to us?
Why didn't you stop me
From turning out this way???