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xflatpancakex3
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sign my guestbook
Gender: Female
Interests: Picture the scene, where whatever you thought,would, in the blink of an eye, manifest and become illustrated.You'd be sure man that every line drawn reflected a life that you lovednot an existence that you hated.So, must we demonstrate that we can't get it straight?We've painted a picture, now we're drowning in the paint.Let's figure out what the fuck it's about,before the picture we painted chews us up and spits us out.
Expertise: being 19, fat, and trying to get thin. while being slightly crazy. yeah, im good at that...
Message: message me
Member Since:
10/18/2005
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| please choose recoveryi've embarked on the path of recovery and I still have a long way to go. but I've also come far, far enough to know that my eating disorder is not me. far enough to know that I want recovery...
Be Impeccable With Your Word
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean.
Avoid using the word to speak against yourself
or to gossip about others. Use the power of
your word in the direction of truth and love.
Don't Take Anything Personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What
others say and do is a projection of their
own reality, their own dream. When you are
immune to the opinions and actions of others,
you won't be the victim of needless suffering.
Don't Make Assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express
what you really want. Communicate with others
as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings,
sadness and drama. With just this one agreement,
you can completely transform your life.
Always Do Your Best
Your best is going to change from moment to
moment; it will be different when you are
healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance,
simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment,
self-abuse and regret.
farewell to all. please remember that you are worth so much more than your eating disorder allows you to believe. i wish the best of luck to all of you and i hope you can someday rid yourselves of this fucking disorder.
xoxoxo flatpancake
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| xanga is a threatening atmosphere for me while im in treatment. how can i recover if im faced with such triggering material.
so, i am taking a leave of absence. i'll probably cave in and log on once or twice but i really need to take a break from looking at "thinspo" for hours dreaming and hoping and imagining that i could be that thin...
farewell for a while, take care EVERYONE. I love you all, and I hope you learn to love yourselves...
xoxoxo
fuck
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| they upped my meal plan again
im feigning for weed when i am not high
lunch was terrible today, so much food, so much fullness from the beginning, so much disgust on the way out the door
=[
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| i feel happy and motivated today.
preview of my white trash attire for the party this weekend. im gonna add a trucker hat, some gaudy looking fake nails, and perhaps an over sized plaid button up shirt with the sleeves cut off. and gross makeup. HA
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| i gave up my scale yesterday, but i got weighed in during treatment today. 114.4
im going to try to do my best with the meal plans this next week, but on saturday night im going to my friend's cabin and we are having a little WHITE TRASH party. so i'll be wearing slutty white trash attire, so i'll need to be as empty as possible so i don't look like a white trash beached whale. so with the exception of saturday, i will try to eat exactly what i am supposed to eat.
it seems like i used "so" too many times...
uhhh what else? i dunno, but im off to smoke some weed...
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