blahblahblah -work: I managed to find a job, thanks to christina and ester. I work 8 to 5 every week day at ctl nexus, where I pull apart old computers and occasionally other things like printers. I use a drill, hammer, wireclippers, and everything else in a toolbox.. haha I feel tough at work. :) seriously getting a workout from using tools and lifting computers everyday.. my shoulders/biceps/deltoids muahah. I really don't know how long I can handle this though. Each day my body is so tired right after work.. I want to just go home and eat and be lazy.
-weather is AMAZING. portland looks gorgeous right now. beach time.
-my mom really wanted me to sign up for yoga classes with her, so for the next month I have yoga membership. Yay :)
-seattle july 5, july 18-20, and possibly another trip so far planned.
-mochi ice cream = my replacement for frozen yogurt. i wish i could just walk to frozen yogurt. but i might as well eat the mochi that my mom keeps supplying to our fridge. we have four freaking boxes of them, and a carton of green tea. my plan to stay in shape at home would not be working if it weren't for work.
-i've been having nightmares alot now. as much as nightmares disturb me, i'm fascinated by them and take them to heart. so i've not only been physically tired but nervous and scared as well. Plus while I'm working i think of alot, and that always leads to more worries and reflections and nostalgia. adding to that, i've been listening to korean music while i work just so i can think more in korean and try to improve, but that music just puts you in a sad mood! haha. i haven't talked with many people either, so i've slowly become a tired teapot bubbling with fears and sadness and worries about to runneth over. .. that sounds worse than it actually is, but you get the picture. i need peace. or sleep.
-currently reading purpose driven life and peace like a river. currently listening to epik high and just surrender. currently watching i survived a japanese gameshow .
-kung fu panda is so cuuute! i lol whenever i think about the acupuncture part, when the mantis is behind the panda po's back and makes that goofy face. or the part when oogway (sp?) tries to blow the candles out. or the dumpling training scene. :( so cute. mm i wanna see wall-E. and hancock. and oo the dark knight.
anyways. a) i'm not in seattle b) i haven't hung out as much as i want to c) work d) other people are busy on vacation, school, work etc. = i don't know how everyone is doing. i wonder how everyone's summers are? :T hope all's going swell folks.
-so this is the beginning of summer, when i sleep in as much as i can because i have no other plans for the day. it's really nice actually. i'm finally beginning to understand where everything is in my new house, and i love my bed. (: pretty soon i plan on going jogs around the nice path set around my neighborhood, tutor, and hopefully work! (yes i found work)
-it was fun coming back to my church and my hometown. i realize as much as i love seattle, there's too much here in portland that i couldn't ever say goodbye and never see again. i have my family, my church i grew up in, my places to eat and shop at, places to play.. the only thing lacking i guess, is the presence of some of my friends..best friend still at berkeley for summer qtr, two friends moved, friends working fulltime, friends i grew apart from, friends on huge vacations, friends in seattle. mmm... i guess this is when work comes in to keep me busy =T
-my last night/day in seattle made me think about how many people i'll miss and what moments i had. i can't exactly pinpoint when my favorite moments were.. i guess they're all tailored for each individual friend i've made. i realized that i grew in a lot of different ways for this year, in trust, in love, and in joy. i thank everyone in seattle because you all helped me grow and provided me so much comfort and prayer and love. thanks for providing a community that i will miss so much, and i look forward to the times i visit... i expect to see growth and God's progress each time i go back to church. :)
-my first night in portland i had to play with a nine year old boy for over four hours.. i'm not sure what to think about a nine year old boy who: likes to carry a purse everywhere even in the house, creates what he calls "fashion clothes" for his dog, repeatedly says "oh my goshh" and "sexy butt", throws baby powder in the air to pretend he's a magician, and most of all, likes hilary clinton. I never thought I'd hear a little boy telling me that he loves hilary. Or tell me that I laugh like a freaking peacock.
-i intend to practice the piano so that i can bring some pieces back.
I: - have two more weeks of UW left - am scared of change and scared of the bigger picture - have some questions I am too scared to ask God - like to listen to sad Korean songs even though it makes me sad - actually like the getting sad part when I listen to sad Korean songs - wish I had more time - still don't have my summer set in stone - need to learn how to set more boundaries on time, eating, & my heart - really miss my family - want to go to the beach please. - haven't sat down to enjoy the sunrise or sunset for a long time. - suck at surrendering for what I know is a greater plan - want some sushi. or steak - need to work on believing happiness will follow wherever I go - want to know why I spent a year here - am a pessimistic romantic if there's such thing - 'm not gonna write you a love song (is stuck in my head) - wonder what's taking so long for me
So there's two toilets in my dorm bathroom, and I particularly like the one closest to my door because the other one sprays a lot. Whenever I use that toilet, I have to try to exit AS I flush because the water literally jumps at you. But unfortunately, maybe once every other week some person likes to clog my favorite toilet. And it's really awkward when you go into that stall and then come out, looking like you caused that dump even though you DIDN'T.. and then this other person comes in and sees that stall.. awkward. (this just happened) -But maybe not as awkward as the (multiple) times I try to take a shower and someone is singing really loudly. -Or the time I tried to take a shower and a girl was in one of them sobbing. -Or the time earlier this year when I walked into the odegaard bathroom and a girl was saying to her friend, "in the name of Jesus I can do it!! GO chocolate!!" And then they started talking in Korean,"omg that was so embarrassing" when I can in fact understand them. ..But maybe not as awkward/horrible as the time last year, when I walked into the bathroom and a girl was bawling with her friend how she got raped by her dad. Yeahh.
Bathrooms are very awkward. And very dirty. I find it gross that people use the bathroom next to me and leave without washing their hands. Personally, I feel even more convicted to do a thorough job of washing my hands when there's someone else in the bathroom.
Talking about dirty... my English teacher discovered a dirty secret in class yesterday. There was a box for electricity I think(?) on the wall, and a classmate pointed out that something was peeking out from above it. My teacher pulled up a chair and stood on it to reach the top of the box, and sure enough there was a stash of porn. What a moment that woke up my class for discussion.. we came to the assumption that it's a janitor's haha. Our English teacher joked that that was a diary-worthy moment. Yes, it is weblog-worthy.
Last "dirty" thought. I really want to see some dirt. Walk on it. Hiking or camping. Pine cones. Mud.
Oh ps I live on Falling Waters lane now hahaha sounds like a tribe. Definitely not as cool as Blackhawk drive though.
Today's weather makes me want to go swimming in a lake or something roadtrip to the beach roadtrip anywhere picnic Pike's Place hiking jog outside get together in someones backyard for bbq and play games and sit on the grass go to a carnival go to a carnival and eat cotton candy walk a dog visit the zoo play volleyball or tennis or basketball outside catch the sunrise catch the sunset bike pick some fruit camping & fishing climb a tree
