xoticgrl16's Xanga

I am a graduate

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 01:57:20 GMT

I finally finally passed the Exist Hesi by 3 points; three points. The first time I nearly missed the passing score by two points. In retrospect and drunkness it feels so good. So good that I do not have to return to Corpus, so could that I do not have to pay money so good that i can finally move on. I have one more test until I become a registered nurse. So good. Soooo good. Soo finally.

In life, i realized that perseverance, deterimination, and a positive attitude will get you far in life. I feel that I never gave-up and feel so blessed that I have come this far.

Holla

Yeah.

Thu, 07 Feb 2008 21:45:56 GMT

School is kicking my ass.

Its a helluva good time.

Just want to crawl into a hole and cry.

Till Spring Break . .

Holla

Its Venting Time

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 22:47:33 GMT

Since no one reads this. . Yeah.

I have been pretty good about eating healthy and now. thats totally down the drain. I feel like a mad woman. I drink 2-3 cups of coffee or some coca-cola type type of concoction and I feel horrible! And I had 2 Smirrinoff's (esp) in a row! Whoa! Whoa. Yeah, this is baby shiet but its major shiet to me.

Damn, the stresses of the last semester of nursing school. Its been one hellva ride. I can't believe its going to be over in 3 mths!! Omigolly!!

I know I will probably need waterproof mascara when I graduate!!

I feel soo lonely!! Lonely. I used to be able to not see Ryan for 3 mths and be okay with that because I was focused and determined. Now that things are great, I just want to be with him more and more. And the sad part is I barely talk to him b/c of scheduling. I have this urge to just look around and fill this void of loneliness, but I know that if I did something remotely deceitful I could never forgive myself.

My nursing friends have their lovers visit them at least once this year. My lover, 2 times in 2 years. It hurts me soo much because I just want him near and he is soo busy.

Do you cry because you miss someone or do you cry because you're lonely and stressed and the one person to make it better is too busy to notice.

This semester I am rotating with a school nurse and children go to the nurse for the most mediocre illinesses. If they only knew what life was really all about.

In essence life just is.

Holla

Uh Ah.

Thu, 03 Jan 2008 17:42:26 GMT

I just started studying for the Exist HESI and I feel stressed. I feel like I lost all this self confidence at the drop of a dime. Uh Ah. Everything is happening so fast and I feel at times so lost. I worry more about how life will be like in the next five months. I suppose this is normal for people like me.I will get it, and I will pass.

Wish me luck! Holla

Learning from your mistakes

Tue, 24 Jul 2007 09:58:26 GMT

I am the type of person who has to hit rock bottom before I learn from my mistakes. I am often hard headed, demanding, and my expectations are beyond the stars. There is always a triggering event where I say to myself, " I do not want to be that person anymore." When I've finally learned my lesson, it's too late. All my failed relationships were not because of them, it was me. I pushed too hard, too long, and did not give them my love.

Why is it so hard to be open to love? To give love? It's easy to receive, but hard to give. I have this fear, that if I open myself to love, I will my independence and myself. I told myself a few weeks ago that I do not want to lve in fear, yet fear is what I live everyday.

Love is a gamble, and I do not like to anti-up. I just need to be open to love and do the right thing, even it is the hardest thing for me to do.

We'll see . .

Holla

Monday, July 23, 2007

Mon, 23 Jul 2007 09:30:00 GMT

I love TIME.com's cartoons. I wonder how many fast food places are in the Eastern Hemisphere compared to our hemisphere.

Holla

Question

Mon, 09 Jul 2007 10:53:23 GMT

I was watching the "True Hollywood Story" on E! on American's Next Top Model and I had a few questions. Where are the 4 winners of American's Top Model? If they all won contracts w/ various make-up lines, and blah blah why aren't they a TOP model?

I don't think TOP models go on America's Next Top Model.

On a good note, moving out of Camden.

I think the justice system is full of crap especially at Texas A&M-Corpus Christi. It is what it is.

Impatience! Convenience!

Sat, 23 Jun 2007 11:39:36 GMT

The older I get the more I realize the world is filled w/ shit. So much angst is going on and people forget the power of humanity. People are impatient and want to live a life of convenience! Why? Its the impatience that gets us lost, get us into uneccessary arguments, battles, and poorly cooked food. Why do we do this?

Convenience! There are this knick-knacks that are supposed to make life easier, but to make life easier all you need is creativity and what you have on hand.

I'm I going crazy? Kinda. I need chocolate. I hate people who give you attitude for no reason. Or if they have a reason do not tell you the reason!

I almost quit today during clinical. I wanted to cry, but I did not. Nurses forget what it is like to be students. Please have a heart. You are in the healthcare field of caring! They forgot the meaning of caring.

Holla

Clinicals!

Thu, 14 Jun 2007 16:28:52 GMT

I love clinicals b/c it's a great way to talk to people and get know who they really how. Anyhow, I go into a patient's room and I see the Indian priest saying a prayer. After he's finished he asks who I am, where I go to nursing school and what my ethnicity was. So I told him I was filipino and he says,"Really, you don't have any symptoms of Filipino, maybe Indian." Ha Ha. That was one of the highlights of my day today.

OO, it was meant to be.

Holla

Some Wisedom

Sat, 09 Jun 2007 10:12:06 GMT

Since no one really goes on xanga anymore (i still actively go on xanga, and yes i read the majority of my subscriptions) , I'm just going to post things that pop in my head.

If you're like me, you like to read. My newest great read: the Tao of Pooh by Benjamin Hoff

" In order to take control of our lives and accomplish something of lasting value, sooner or kater we need to learn to Believe. . We simply need to believe in the power within us and use it." (Hoff, 1983 p. 120)

This is all from Pooh! Yes, the ever so lovable Winne-the-Pooh. When Eeyore frets, Piglet hesitates, Rabbity calculates, and Owl pontificates, Pooh just is.

Simple right? Like life. Wrong. I find the more complex I think the farther I get from the points I try to make. Its like pathophysiology (breaking down diseases into the cellular level) the more you break down a disease into its simplest form you understand the complexities it and it all makes sense.

Kind of like life. When you take away the materialsim, celebrity worship, wanting more than you make, you're left with simple nothings.

Its less complex when broken down which in turn leads to better things and understanding lifes complexities like breaking down a disease process to understand signs and symptoms that are exhibited in patients (clients).

Pretty cool right?

I get all this from Winne-the-Pooh! And all though I read "People.com" everday I do it to make conservation with people. It's knowing the little bits of pieces of things that help you learn "People skills." People reading people.

Thanks Pooh for the great advice!

Holla