yijen's Xanga

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Tue, 03 Jun 2008 23:04:22 GMT

I'm bringing Xanga back - drop a comment if you're with me!

Saturday, May 20, 2006

Sat, 20 May 2006 14:27:16 GMT

and it comes full circle...

you truly see it in yourself when you see it in others.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Sun, 14 May 2006 21:36:16 GMT

yesterday, i bled into my birkenstocks in a soccer game. i must say that the stain and pain was well worth it.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Sun, 14 May 2006 15:40:03 GMT

i think you have a great mind, but you are such a fucking heathen.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Sun, 07 May 2006 03:06:08 GMT

here's a definition of an artist...someone who can analyze and portray emotion...pretty good eh? eh?

today was chilly...summer in washington is delayed by a month in my opinion...enough with the clouds and drizzling...i can't wait to get tan so that i can justify some green contacts.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Sun, 07 May 2006 03:01:44 GMT

full speed ahead...here's to packaging.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Sun, 07 May 2006 02:58:20 GMT

it's been a long time since i've written a real entry in this blog...but i'm not quite ready to let go of it yet. there are times when i feel that i've grown out of the crashing waves phase of my life...that i've stabilized...that my mind has entered a clearer, more mature stage. but since when does life ever give you a breather for more than a moment. and i love it. i'm feeling alive again...i'm affecting people...not exactly being affected by other people...but hey it's better one than none. i can only hope that soon someone will play the steely strings again...that was a weird way to describe touching my heart...

recently, i've been admiring people who have significant others...people to cling on as they walk down the streets...people who they come home to...people who they can fall into should their feet slip...that, i don't have.

have i been rewarded for being a nice person? i will say that i've been called by a certain ex-josh that i am an ugly person and that he does not want to see me. part of me believes that he can just kiss a dog's ass. but part of me wonders...is truth so obnoxious? should we hold back what we feel...or should we truly be open to those close to us? some save it up and then blow up or just disappear...some give it like a dose of bitch at every instance. the obvious answer is somewhere between. but who wants to hear that, right? i need a guy who can keep up with me and that can put me back in my place when i need it...where is he? where are you?!?!?!?!?! don't worry, there is no one in mind...

i'm feeling like i'd like to do more taking suddenly...that sounds horrible, i know. but where are my mentors...where is my next big leap in faith...

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Sun, 07 May 2006 02:44:51 GMT

i've had an amazing three weeks...i've been pushed to the limits in corporate politics...defied what different levels of authority have instructed me to do...delivered a presentation on what appeared a desolate topic...was told by three co-workers and a manager that i had presented well...taken on a responsibility regularly performed by auditors two levels higher than me...spoke the truth with my managers...got wacked in both cheeks by a birdie in badminton...went running and reading with a great friend...ate a fantastic meal and took pictures of yachts with an old friend...got the birds eye view of friends past and present at the uw taiwanese night market which a co-worker invited me to--at least five from taipei american school, one from singapore american school, one from a random summer program, and one newly found penn classmate i never knew before lunch earlier in the week...and tomorrow i have dimsum with that one classmate...

it's incredible how the dots connect and life falls in the place where you believed it should...so i guess the lesson learned here is that...eventually, what you have...all your assets and substance will catch up with you and you will be rewarded...

i know i know, it all sounds self-centered and arrogant...but i kid you not, after a good corporate lashing, you kind of have to love the bright light at the end of the tunnel.

Saturday, April 22, 2006

Sat, 22 Apr 2006 17:32:48 GMT

it's kind of cute...how badminton racquets can be strung with different string colors, wrapped with different color and style grips...it's like customizing a meego...when you look on the bench, you can find yours because it's exactly how you made it.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Sat, 15 Apr 2006 05:10:43 GMT

some loquacious fuck told me that me and him were at around the same level of play at badminton tonight...i was like...you need to work on your fucking self awareness, because i could probably beat you and your doubles partner together...and because it was at the end of the session, i couldn't even put him in his place...DAMMIT.

here is the competitive me that honestly i haven't really felt in a long time...since coming here, i just...life has become easy. but anyway, no more being pushed around. i suppose that this reaction is amplified by my first political work situation at microsoft...like...sometimes its just like...what the hell is your problem...