I've been on the most expensive 6 month vacation I will probably ever take in my life. (I'm sure you financial consultants out there would scoff at the future value of my retirement nest egg that I've cut in half for forsaking half a years pay) I hope God will forgive my selfish indulgence. It took me this long to realize that my bitterness and disappointment were really because I expected the wrong things from work.  I should've been more externally focused.  Ultimately in any business, knowing the clients and the market can only help you and protect you from the whims of corporate politics.

While I'm sorry I can't offer much wisdom to many of you who ask what it's like and whether I found the answers to life, I did learn that there is a difference between living with intentionality vs. just pedalling and letting circumstances lead our lives.

More than what I learned while away from work, trying to re-enter the workforce has made me realize how important it is to build a network of people that know and trust you no matter where you land in your career.  To build a circle of clients and co-workers who are genuine, hard-working, and humble will pay dividends as they move on to better pastures.  So choose wisely and don't sell out to the corporate political beast.  God has faithfully landed me places I never would have expected.  While it remains to be seen whether this will be another ten year chapter of my career, it's always a blessing as God surprises me. 

Yielding to God's will in our hearts is difficult.  But when we do, it allows him to exceed our limited vision for our lives.  Let go of ego and selfish desires, put his Kingdom first, live generously for Christ and he will keep you from straying off the path.  Whether in relationships, work, or ministry - we have to strive to have a heart that is willing to give up everything for Christ (he may not actually require you to give "it" up; but he wants us to be able to let go without hesitation).  Don't hang on to what you drive, wear, own, or what you do for a living - don't let it define you - let God own your heart first and the Holy Spirit will take care of the rest.

(We'll see in a weeks time if I will be working...)

My Downtown SanMateo recommendation(s):

1) Fresh Fruit Tapioca at Golden Island (146 E. 3rd Avenue San Mateo, CA 94401)

The fresh fruit tapioca/sago is better than CreationDesserts (Hui lau shan) on Geary and 16th.  The menu is limited but it beats the Q-cup next door!  I like the interior.

2) Get a Bento Box lunch at Suruki Market (71 E. 4th Avenue San Mateo, CA 94401 ) and enjoy it in Central Park two blocks away.  Hint: prices slash after 6:30p but you have to fight the mob.

3) Dim Sum at Joy Luck Place (88 E 4th Ave, San Mateo, CA) - a bit pricey like Harbor Village but at least you don't have to struggle to find parking.

4) Ichiban Kan (98 E 3rd Ave San Mateo, CA 94401) - I addicted to this place! Cheap Japanese import items under $5.  Don't forget the Japanese snacks and drinks at bargain prices (e.g. UCC Can Cofee, Oolong Tea, etc...)

"Cynicism is a belief in ... nothing.  You've already met cynics I'm sure: They're those people who tell you they see things how they 'really' are and that things are really rotten.  They believe that no one is sincere and that everyone has secret, selfish reasons for the things they do.  They'll tell you that everything is rigged against you, and no one means what they say.  The world, according to the cynic, is a cold and cruel place...People who are cynical or jaded, 'make' their own lives cold because they lack courage.  It takes courage to believe in things; sometimes things 'will' disappoint you, sometimes people will let you down.  To have faith is to risk having your heart broken, and the cynic isn't willing to take that risk."

Excerp from "Boys Will Put You On A Pedestal (So they can look up your skirt)" by Philip van Munching

The quote and the title don't seem to jive until you discover that it's a book to help fathers raising daughters.

Anyway the interesting coincidence is that as I was on my morning commute listening to KFAX, the Turning Point Ministries sermon was about how Courage is not the opposite of fear, but that Love is the opposite of fear.  When a child cries because they are afraid, a parent responds with love (rather than heroism)

Anyway, then during our Alpha dinner, Nancy read the quote above and so my mind has been wrestling with opposites...

Courage is the opposite of Cynicism

Love is the opposite of Fear