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yoomie1
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Country: United States
State: California
Birthday: 1/10/1986
Interests: sing, sleep, do anything thats fun and doesnt involve a lot of thinking
Expertise: i love to sing, play volleyball, run in track, do stats for the boys basketball, do club stuff/community service, SLEEP, meeting new people, have fun when i actually can, etc etc
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  yoomie1
Member Since:
11/21/2002
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| i need to figure out what i want in my life and what i want in my future. i find myself thinking about it more and more yeeeeesh.
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| ive never felt so low in my life. ive never felt so empty in my life. i never thought i would have to do this again, but maybe permanently this time. i had to lose him once before and i was able to deal with it then, but why is it so hard now? i was led to believe this would never happen again and i felt like i was genuinely loved. and i loved him the same. so i finally broke my wall, but now i wish i didnt. maybe im just so paranoid and think that he is with her because him going back to her has happened before. i really want to believe him when he says that they arent. but what would u think and how would u feel knowing that hes been hanging out with her a lot more? cuz of that, i have my doubts. that is the reason why i cant completely believe him when he says he doesnt want to be in a relationship for a long time till he gets his life in order. but i felt so crushed to find out he didnt think i would understand him when he was to say hes scared of commitment. i always thought he knew he could tell me anything and i would understand. its not like i was the one rushing into this commitment thing. i took my time and bam when i think its for real, its over. so i felt so dumb to finally believe that he wasnt shitting with me this time and he really wants me. but now he doesnt cuz of the way ive been handling things. of course im not handling! so now im at the point when i feel he doesnt care anymore so im going to disappear. ive lost my best friend forever and i dont know how to handle.
i need to get away. i want to get away. but i cant. im stuck. i dont know what will help to get me out of this. im scared.
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| wow....its been a while since my last entry. well, just to let everyone know, im happy with my life so far. i have great family and great friends so i couldnt be happier. school on the other hand....drags. but im trying to do the best i can. school starts on monday so my new years resolution is to get straight a's. oh yes....i havent done this since like my first year here and i know its going to be difficult but im going to try my best. going to start an internship soon....hopefully paid, if not.....then find another job. oh and i have the best bf i can ask for. i never knew someone can care so much about me till now. so to end my entry, im grateful for my family, my friends in california, my friends in hawaii, and my life. sooo....ill try to update this thing more hehe k byeeee byeee
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| tonight is one of those nights where i just want to get away from everything. i am entirely too stressed. school, work, clubs, community service, friends leaving or just losing friends, anything and everything is really getting to me. i wish i didnt feel so alone. i know i have friends, even best friends to talk to. but the one person i need to talk to, to make me feel better, im not talking to. gawd, life really sucks right now. i just want to bundle up in a ball.
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