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| I haven't posted in a really long time, and I'm kinda bored, so here I go.
Tonight was Homecoming, and I didn't get to go
because I had to work. I was kinda sad about that, but it was a
silly night of work. I heard from the people that I talked to
that their nights sucked, and I feel bad. It probably wouldn't
have matter if I was there or not, but sometimes I'd like to think I
can make a difference in people's lives. Haha. I like to
think I'm important.
Tomorrow we're moving all out stuff. Should be
a pretty interresting day. I've got to admit that I really don't
wanna move, but seeing as I've got no choice in the matter, it's all
good. I guess everything happens for a reason. Ha, that's
been like my mantra lately.
I heard Lauren and Keith won king and queen. I so called that this morning.
I can't help but think that I'm a terrible person
lately. But it's not like it hasn't been like that since the
summer, so I don't now why I haven't given up on talking about it
yet. I guess I'm just retarded? Sure, why not.
Well, I'm all finished here. No one reads this anymore anyway, but I like typing.
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| Me: "Death only scares me when it happens to people around me because
I'm afraid of being alone. If I got sick, i wouldn't be afraid to
die."
X : "Why aren't you afraid to die?"
Me: "It's something that I've come to expect...it's inevitable, and if
it's my time to leave the world, who am I to stop it? I don't
believe in heaven or hell, so there are no worries for me.
When you die, you either have eternal rest or you're reincarnated into
something else. Perhaps a blade of grass? Or a fox.
You never know."
X : "Wow...that's beautiful...and comforting."
So, I think that's one of the most amazing things I've ever come up with.
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| There's a lot of things that I wish would be said, but I don't think they're going to surface.
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| It's been a while... Today at work was amusing for the time I spent
there. I worked with Brian and It's Been a While by Stained came
on, and we were both singing it. I guess that was the most
amusing part of my three hours? Except him telling me he was
going to curb stomp me. What a silly boy.
Okay, so my house was flooded last week. Three
inches in the house, I believe. There was enough water to leave
an inch of mud on the living room and kitchen floor. My room
somehow didn't get mud, but it got wet. The laundry room had a
little mud in it too, but not a lot. I cleaned up that room last
night. It looks like tomorrow I'll be getting to play in some mud
as we shovel out the last room in the basement and pressure wash
it. Fun!
Still dating Josh, which is good, but I haven't
gotten to talk to him much lately because he's working a lot...that or
he calls when I'm passed out because I've been so tired lately.
With the way we both work, I don't see him getting his license changing
things all that intensely. I could be wrong though.
I've been thinking over a lot of things lately, and
mistakes that I've made. I'm far from perfect, but we all knew
that. The best thing that I could think of was a qoute from a
book I read, and I'll leave you with that.
"Is this really a wise strategy for living? Insisting that most
of life isn't to be taken seriously. Relentlessly viewing it as a
cosmic joke. Having only four guiding principles: one, do as
little harm to others as possible; two, be there always for your
friends; three, be responsible for yourself and ask nothing of others;
four, grab all the fun you can. Put no stock in the opinions of anyone but the closest to you. Forget about leaving a mark on the world. Ignore the great issues of your time and thereby improve your digestion. Don't dwell in the past. Don't worry about the future. Live in the moment. Trust in the purpose of your existence and let meaning come to you instead of straining to discover it. When life throws a hard punch, roll with it - but roll with laughter. Catch the wave, dude."
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| It is entirely too early for this. So I think I've decided that I'm going to start
posting regularly on here...even though no one reads it. But
that's okay, that just means I can say whatever I want and not worry
about people talking. Oh, high school.
Speaking of high school, I thought I was done with
the stupid drama for two months? Guess not. Last night the
guy that the one waitress likes came to get food and a runner said
something and we all laughed, then the waitress that liked the guy
freaked out and like...yelled at us. I didn't even know what was
going on. But anyway, the one runner was totally avoiding that
server and not speaking to her. All I could think was "Wow, I
can't get away from it for more than a week." Yeah, that was my
night last night.
This weekend is looking good, though. Tonight
after work my dad's driving me to Josh's little family picknick
thing. Picknick doesn't look like it's spelled right. Oh
well. But yeah, I get to hang out with Josh tonight which is
pretty sweet. I'll spend the night up there and then get dropped
off tomorrow in time for work.
Speaking of work, (redundant, I know) this coming
week will just be swell! Let's see, this weekend my schedule was
Friday, Saturday, Sunday, five to close, and this coming week I work
Wednesday and Thursday four to close, Friday five to close, and
Saturday and Sunday twelve to four. I don't mind the afternoon
hours at all. Fuck, I can be out by four? Yeeeaaaah.
I like it. But five days in a row? That's gonna kick my
ass. I haven't worked more than three. The paycheck will be
veeeery nice though. Can't complain about that.
Next week's paycheck's looking pretty good too, I
was there until eleven last night. I'll probably be getting paid
for like...twenty nine hours? And that's about...two hundred
dollars. So probably around one-ninety next week. That's a
bit less than last week, but that's okay, I'll take it.
I ramble on about meaningless things when I'm
tired. It was too hot to fall back to sleep after Josh called
me. Oh well, that means I'll be able to fall asleep no problem
tonight. He said his brother's got his bed, though, so I don't
know where we're going to sleep. If it comes to it, I'll pass out on
the floor somewhere. I know I'll be tired. I could actually
go for some coffee right now...but I dont feel like getting up and I
can't seem to find my way around that. I am lazy. Oh yes,
am I lazy.
For once, I'm really happy. I've got a good
boyfriend, I like my job, and everything seems to be going well at
home. Almost too good, right? Now that I said that,
something's bound to happen to ruin it. But hey, let's live in
the moment.
There's a song that's been stuck in my head for
about a week. It's by Brand New, called Soco, Ameretto, and
Lime. The few lines I always sing are "I'm gonna stay eighteen
forever, so we can stay like this forver, and we'll never miss a party,
'cause we keep them going constantly" and "And tonight we'll go on
forever while we walk around this town like we own the streets and stay
awake through summer like we own the heat singing everybody wake up
wake up it's time to get down and when I pass the bottle back to Pete
on the overpass tonight I bet we laugh". Yeah. I like that
song.
I think I'm nocturnal, lol. I'm up until at
least three in the morning most nights, if not five, then I'll sleep
until around two. It's nice, but I don't get anything done during
the day. I want to start getting up by noon and going outside to
sit in the sun for a while. These, what is it? Two weeks
we've been out of school? I haven't gotten a tan and I've only
been swimming like three times. Highly unlike me. I'm
usually burnt to a crisp before school let's out and showing all kinds
of tan lines by now. I miss being tan, I've got to work on
that.
Well, this entry is getting long, so I'll stop rambling now.
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