...and another blog spot.  ecentries.blogspot.com

So this'll be my last one.  By this time next week, I'll be done with two exams, one 20 pager, one 10 pager and one 5 pager (all double spaced, thank the Lord).  Family comes in on Friday and I will be leaving them and Grand Rapids early Sunday morning for Nashville for one week of sales school, where I will learn how to essentially run my own business.  This summer will be a challenge for sure, but I've got a feeling that I'll pull through somehow!

This situation in Burma pains my heart.  It's just so incredibly frustrating when I read of the lack of immediate, intentional help from the government to the people.  I get emails every other day from Free Burma Rangers, and yesterday an FBR sent pictures of some of the after-effects of the cyclone.  One image is of a mix of debris and bodies - kids - along the coast.  Something about sending money to FBR and looking at that picture doesn't settle right with me.  There's got to be more.  For now, all I think of is my long-term goal ... working towards ways to reconcile this disparity between government and its people that we see so often throughout the world (um, West Virginia anyone?  I pray the problem of the local government not valuing their people's voice will somehow improve)

Well, back to studying.  Right now I'm reading about why the nature of competition in the U.S. health care system should change and suggestions for how ...

So I feel like one thing (amongst many) that I have learned as a result of my four years at Calvin is: simply say thank you when someone gives me a compliment.  Before, everytime someone gave me a compliment I would automatically brush it off as, "oh noooo my presentation wasn't that good" or if someone compliments me on something I'm wearing I'll respond with "oh yeah, I got it from J.Crew (hehe)!".  Now I've learned (and still am practicing) to just say thank you and be grateful for the compliment.

A friend once mentioned...a compliment is a gift.  If someone is giving you a gift, you wouldn't give it back or try to shrug it off or say to them ... oh gosh, don't give that gift to me! (ok..exception would be within the Chinese culture - something I cannot stand but need to tolerate!) You would accept that gift and say thank you.  One of my pet peeves is if I say to you: "You look lovely today." and you answer back with "thanks, so do you!" as this automated response or just out of habit.  It's taken me some time, but I appreciate it when someone just accepts my compliment and says a simple thank you.  I want you to know that you look nice today or that you did a very good job on that presentation.  I don't expect anything back.

Of course, this is just my personal opinion.  And I'm trying to remind myself of that because my dad is someone who is very much bad at just saying thank you to compliments.  He's SO Chinese.  When I tell my dad that I appreciate him so much and that I love him, he just HAS to answer with something along the lines of ... you know, it's good that God puts people who love us in our lives...or well, God has really blessed all of us...it's always something in the plural and it can't be just singular.

I think there needs to be a balance of both - complimenting individuals as well as keeping in mind that the world doesn't revolve around one person, but right at this moment I just think that at least in my family (specifically because my family is Chinese), I just wish there was more intentionally directed, personal uplifting comments.  We say I love you to each other at the end of each phone conversation, but I know that it's just awkward if we say it to each other face to face.

Then again ... my dearest friends who I can say that to are also American and I can't help but remember that it must be a cultural thing too ... well, and that my friends and I are accostumed to looking at each other in the eyes and telling each other how much we mean to each other...and that took time to do, since you learn to trust each other only through time.  I just hope for that intimate friendship with my own family ... especially now that I know I've grown so much and am more mature (yet still growing, of course - but willing to grow more and be challenged!), and am a lot different from the Eunice they were used to in high school and even over this past Christmas break.

Anyways, for me I know I want to get better at really meaning the compliments I offer to people and to be meaningful in the little things I do ... for you never know how even the littlest thing like "I appreciate you." might make someone's day :)

The more I think about the weddings I'll be missing out on this summer, the more disappointed I am in myself in having signed up for working with Southwestern all this summer.  I have been invited to three weddings, two of which the people getting marrie dare good friends.  Should I get a round trip plane ticket twice, throughout the summer?  The downside of that would be: (1) money, but money is replaceable and I wouldn't mind at least if i order ahead of time...I'm sure I can find some cheap tickets; (2) readjusting to work would be very difficult, for sure, but I just think to myself..I've had to readjust myself to a whole different culture and country and way of life for five months last year, so I'm pretty sure I can handle this.  It's all mental.

The upsides would be: well, seeing two of my good friends get married.  Both weddings would be in Grand Rapids.  I just keep thinking....these weddings should mean more to me than the plans to work that I have for myself.  But then again, I'm not in either of them.

Also, what do people usually get for weddings gifts?

 me: wait, do you know if you have real player at home?
 ruth: uhhhh
 me: that might be the problem if you don't have it
ask baba
 ruth: he says"ing gai yo, ba! " he says i can download it.
should i?
 me: hmmm
 ruth: EWWWW a spider just crawled on my face

Currently Listening Getting By By Tim Be Told

I can't stress enough how vital relationships are in breaking labels and assumptions made about people.

Think of how the majority of America have been (and may very well still be) so incredibly unfair towards ... (well, here are just a few) Africans, Irish, Japanese, Chinese, Indians (um, the ones who occupied the land that we kind of just took?) ... the Amish and now Muslims.

What race do you think of now when you read the word 'terrorist'?  Why?

Someone mentioned to me how different Calvin is from most other Christian colleges.  I mean ... not many Christian colleges have panels where homosexual students speak and then take questions from the audience.  Tonight Dean Koldenhoven (receiver of the 2002 John F. Kennedy Profile in Courage Award and also former mayor of Palos Heights, IL) came to Calvin and spoke on "Religious Tolerance - Love Your Neighbor".  It was refreshing to hear a Christian in a leadership position speak about the importance of dialogue and getting to know people (who may or may not share views with you on various thhings) to get rid of stereotypes and the very type of attitude much of America had towards Africans when they were labeled "Property" or towards the Amish when the response of the new belief in voluntary baptism was met with persecution and for some, death.

Relationships are organic and building them is part of the second greatest commandment after loving God: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'  There is no commandment greater than these.