it was so nice to be lazy this morning.. i woke up at like 8 but i just layed in bed with nothin to do.. it's been so long since i've been able to do that. I feel rejuvinated.. is that weird? i think something was wrong with the scale the other day when it said i weighed 155 because the next morning i weighed like 159... and now i weigh like 158.. so idk i think it goes crazy sometimes or something. so now i have 6 lbs to lose.. if the scale was right. you know to any normal person 3 lbs wouldn't be a big deal, but to me it makes me so sad to think about that for that one day i weighed 155 or so it said and now i weigh 158... i just wanna get down to 120... i just wanna lose like 38 more lbs...hopefully i can lose at least half of that by summertime.. i wanna look skinny in a bathing suit.. im so incredibly scared of summer right now. So if I lose 19 lbs by the time summer is here ill weigh 139.. so i have a little over two months.. im hoping so bad that I can do this. if i think about it this way though.. i once weighed 179... disgusting I know.. and if i can push myself to where I am now.. I can push myself to be where I want to. I love you all and I hope you have a great week next week.

Sincerely,
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