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| Times does fly, and memories will remain forever... every moment you ever lived has been an adventure on the real... every single thing you have done, confessed, or exposed will be remembered, because things like that will never be erased from one's memory. You should live with the choices you have made, because of those same choices you are the person that you are now, you chose the path you chose because you wanted to, no one else made you choose... but what if right? You are always asking yourself that same question... and my answer is, why worry about the past, when it is the future you should be thinking about... you just started living, you've got so much more ahead of you, you have no idea... now that I think about it, you will always dwell on the past, well eventually you won't as much. It's not your fault, it is who you are, you've always been that type of person. You've always been the type of individual who thought life always had a plan, that everything happened for a reason, that you had nothing to worry about because in the end it would all be okay, I mean look at you now, you have all you can ever ask for, you have an awesome life, this is what you always wanted... | | |
| So I've been having these headaches for the last couple of days, I think I'm sick, again... life's good though, I can't complain, I can honestly say that I am still surprised, and amazed at how my life has changed. I feel like a whole new person. I am still playing guitar as usual, last week Ryan, Braxton and I played for a few hours before I had to go to church. That was fun, at the very end Ryan and I played our favorite song by Blink-182. I love music, I really do lol. I wish I would've started playing guitar when I was a lot younger, then I'd be an expert by now lol, I am still a newbie... you know, when I have a lot going on in my head, it helps to look out the window and just wait and enjoy the sunset, every time that occurs I think about all what I've done in life, all my mistakes and accomplishments, the good and bad times, and all the friendships that I've made, I cherish all that I got in life, I'm just glad I'm alive, thank You for everything.
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| So, I'm taking my little sister and her friend to the Jonas Brothers concert, she's been wanting to go for a while so I know this means a lot to her, hopefully she'll remember that I truly care about her, even though I sometimes don't show it! Haha, I truly care about my family, I guess I am kinda grouchy when it comes down to me doing favors for them, but I try to do my best I swear! lol. I've gotten better over the years I think... one more week! 
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| Life's too crazy, all I can do right now is pray for it to be over... the things I have to do for the people I love... anyways, I can't complain, good things have happened to me lately, I am taking life more seriously now, I believe I had always had that carefree attitude, I mean I still do... not as much though, I guess I could say that I've lost that closeness that I had with few of my best friends throughout the years. Those close friends I had are all grown up so it is to be expected you know? We can't hang out everyday like we used to, or do the same things we used to do, man those were the days that I've been missing a lot lately, going to concerts, egging cars, TPin' houses, bonfires, haha. They are out in the real world now and have more responsibilities, I'm glad we were best friends... perhaps I should've called them more often or driven an hour just to see them, but as I said before I can't complain. I've gained a new best friend, she's awesome, well okay more than awesome lol, and the craziest thing of all, we don't do anything and still have fun, one thing I've noticed about myself is how when none of us is talking I usually start singing a random song, or she does the same, it's silly I know, but it is still fun. What makes me happy is the fact the she doesn't try to impress me, she's just herself and so am I, perhaps I joke around too much around her, you know how I always make weird jokes, but she thinks they are funny, lol so I guess it's alright. One thing that makes me laugh is when she says she's really hungry, you'd think that she'd want to eat a lot, well she doesn't, she eats very little and says she's done, haha. Also she makes fun of me for not eating very much, just because you don't see me eating doesn't mean I don't eat! lol. Ah, she's so crazy... the other day I had my windows rolled down and I was driving back home while playing Lips of an Angel by Hinder, and this was going on during sunset, well I just had a crazy flashback starting from 2002 until now and it just made me smile, just thinking of how quickly the years had gone by, how much I had changed, and how many friends I had made... I believe I am still that same Harold I have always been, just not as crazy as before I guess, and I think that's a good thing. I believe I had to let go of all that stuff to keep my life in order, and it's working... here's a little something I wrote a while ago, just thought I should post it on here because I just haven't written anything like it in a while...
"You should think twice before you go out, because you just murder me with your outter beauty... you strike me with your eyes as if two bullets were directly aimed at my heart, then it shatters and no trace is left... and there is no way to describe where my mind takes off every time I notice you... and as corny as it may sound, you are a drug, a drug I'm addicted to, a drug I'm trying to get out of my system... that is why I'm still on this mental rehab, a mental rehab that is no other than a bunch of lies and beliefs that at least give some relief to my poor soul..." 07-01-05.
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| So I wonder why I am always so relaxed and laid back or get over hurtful stuff so quickly, it takes a while, months for others, but not me, when I need to worry, I just don't... is it a bad thing? I don't let get things get to me. When I am supposed to be hurting, I feel like something keeps me away from such pain, it's always been You... always. I was blind to see it before, no wonder why I feel so content with myself right now, not just right now, let me rephrase that, I have always felt happy with my life, even if I denied You, You were always there for me. I always knew You would make things better, I have always trusted You, and You know what my next move is going to be. There's no fooling You... all things happen for a reason, I have said it before even on my very first Xanga, and I will say it on here. My life kind of revolves around that statement... perhaps that's another reason why I'm happy with life? When one door closes, another one opens. I seriously have it all, what else could I ask for, I have wonderful friends, a wonderful family which I absolutely adore, even though I sometimes say mean things to them I know I will always loved them, and an amazing best friend... I shouldn't really be asking for anything else, I should give more instead...
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