oh wow...

I am done with four years of college life. How did I get through all those years...?

It seems like it was just yesterday that I got here. THinking back on the very first day I got here, I was a very naive, "good" girl...but now I feel that I've become more independent, out-spoken, vunerable, and educated...although the last one is questionable... (LOL)

I can't believe I am leaving this place. It saddens me more now that I know the time is nearer, and that everything has change. Although growing up means getting yourself out of the comfor zone, I am still having a hard time thinking about it. I think about the lonely nights I'll have, not being able to call my friends just to talk. Not being able to rant about my stress...and just not to think about what lies ahead.

I feel that from this day on, the road will only get harder, and complicated. I know my parents expect alot from me, and so does everyone else since I have earned a degree from the U.S. But honestly...I don't know if I'll be good at anything. What if I fail, and dissapoint people? What if I realize that I've become nothing....

Although, failing is something I am scared of, something that's alot more scarier is being alone. Since all my close friends are abroad, to whom do I talk to about my stress, and my failures...

Who will encourage me with pep-talks. Telling me everything is ok, and that even if I fail, I'll be fine. THat I can get up and go again. That thought scares me. THe image of me crying alone on my bed, which I've done alot in Burma, scares me tremendously....

Wow...life will never be the same again.