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read my profile sign my guestbook  Name: Michelle Vo Country: United States State: Oklahoma Metro: Tulsa Birthday: 8/25/1987 Gender: Female Interests: being happy, having adventures, memories... Occupation: Student Industry: Medical Message: message meEmail: email me Website: visit my website MSN: dimpleangel_25@hotmail.com Member Since: 11/29/2005 |
Monday, September 10, 2007
LONG TIME NO SEEhello all! i know its been awhile...i thought i'd stop using this, but i have somethings on my mind so i'm just gonna pour my heart out...i sometimes wonder to myself.... about love...about soul-mates.. about things like that... the one who i dreamed of marrying ever since i knew i was in love with him.. i dont know.. its like i'm keeping him at a distance- one that is close enough for me to love him and him to love me- give affection and mess around, spend time together.. yet far enough to where he doesnt know what is really going on inside of me.. heh its funny becuz i used to tell him everthing.. i dont know what happened but there are things inside me i want him to know about so he can comfort me~ however i cant let him know.. for the things i'm keeping inside are the things that will tear him apart.. i know they will. he really wants comfort me, but i cant let him.. he'll be comforting me in the most torturing way due what's inside me... how do i tell him that i fell in love with another guy? and that i'm still in love with that guy~ the guy i fell for is also the guy he suspected i was seeing/talking to awhile back.. how do i let him know he was right? how do i heal from all this? how do let everything go?~~~how is this love? how are we soul-mates then? how can i be only his if i fell for someone else? what the hell happened?!~~~~how do i let the other one go? its funny and weird becuz i think God is telling me something- that i'm not suppose to be with the other one, that maybe i wasnt suppose to have fallen for him (or was i?).. he's married now..and has a baby on the way. it hurts to know it had to end that way.. it hurts to realize that nothing can ever happen between us. what hurts the most is... i shouldnt be longing for him when i'm not even sure he felt the same~~ he's the one at a distance that i cant get to, yet i would love to give my whole heart to...however~ how am i suppose to give him my heart when i've already given it to someone else? ~~i wish i was with him... i wish i could be with him.. but it wasnt meant to happen... i have to let him go.. i already have someone that loves me unconditionally.. i should realize and accept that... someone else loves me.. he has been loving me for the past 5 yrs now.. even after what i've put him thru...he still loves me.... why? why do i deserve that..?...i dont deserve it all. i'm tired of missing and longing for the other one.. he isnt mine to long for, yet i am still. my head knows to let go- but my heart is being stubborn and not allowing me to set him free. i just feel like i'm suppose to be with him, or at least there to help him thru what he's going to and about to go thru.. i honestly dont think there's anyone who's really by his side to talk to him, to help him... and i have a strong pulling sense towards him...however i dont want that feeling...he put himself in that position.. he'll have others to help him right?? i dont know... i just feel that i wanna be around him....even if its just to talk to him as just someone that helped him... | |
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
UPDAAAAAAAAATTTE!!!HELLO ALL!!!! WOW ITS BEEN AGES SINCE I'VE BEEN ON...LOL....WELL FOR THOSE OF U WHO STILL USE THIS AND READ....HERE'S AN UPDATE I GUESS...YESTERDAY WAS HALLOWEEEEN! DID NOTHING BUT PASS OUT CANDY TO TRICK O TREATERS...THAT WAS FUN AND KUUUUUUUTTEE!! HAHAA SAW A LIDO GIRRAFFE!!! AWWWWWWW! UMMM PIGGED OUT ON CANDY BIG TIME..SO I GAINED A FEW POUNDS...LOL..UMMM LETSEEE....ITS NOVEMBER ALREADY...EEEEE NEW YEARS IS COMING FAST....AHHH ITS NEXT SATURDAY!!! WOWWWWWWUH! WELL HOPEFULLY THIS YEAR'S IS COOL TOO LIKE LAST YEARS...HOPE THERE'S AN AFTER PARTAY TOOOO! ANYONE WHO KNOWS LEMME KNOW PLZ!!! THANX! THEN THERE'S THE MADISON NEW YEARS...STILL DEBATING IF I WANNA GO....WELL OK I DO WANNA GO BUT THERE'S ISSUES THAT I'D RATHER NOT SAY...BASICALLY TRYIN TO FIND A WAY TO LET THE BF KNOW I'M GOING W/O HIM HAVING A FREAKIN COW...HAHAHA.. BUT WE'LL SEE.... ANYWAY IMMA GO WATCH A MOVIE NOW..SO I'M OUTZ!!!! | |
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
why hello!wOwzers!! been a looooooong while since i been here..hahaa...been bz with school and myspace..haha.. so how are my fellow xangers?? goodie i hope... ummmm my 19th bday just passed..WHOO! hahaa, it was fun..Chau and friends threw me a BBQ party...food was great, drinks were great ..lol! but nothing serious...i had to drive home too ya kno.. cake was yummy  icecream cake...=D --college has started up for me again..ugghhhhhh  ...i hafta think again...hehee..its alright i guess...my harder classes are this semester...i think..well two of em anyway..hahaa i share the same math class as mikee..  lol...so i'll definitely be copying him...kekekee.. --as with my problems...i guess everything is going smooth...still a few bumps in the road..but who's doesnt have em.. my feelings are coming together..yet still scattered..????..if that makes sense.. still not sure about some things and others i am sure...so yea... i dunno... i guess this is it for now......until next time....stay cool, peace outz...and love yall! | |
Sunday, August 06, 2006
dunno.....uhhhhhhhhh.....pplz... my dad told me that he had two dreams about me...both the same thing.. he told me that he dreamed he prepared 2 weddings for me.. but.... the groom didnt show up... ?????????? wth does that mean??...i'm scared now...wut are they suppose to mean?? i know they're just dreams but...dreams DO mean something ya kno.. and he had TWO not one... he asked me wats going on and if anything was wrong btwn me and chau...and i'm like, no everything is ok...now....wat my daddy told me has been bothering me alot...wats going to happen? wats GOING ON?! geeeeez...shiet got me all thinking about...my head hurts like hell now...time to go drinking..heh.. | |
Saturday, July 29, 2006
mannnnnnwho are all these ppl commenting me?! i dont even know who u are!!!!!! geeeez! if i dont know u ur comments wont mean shiet...and WHY is it a big deal to marry "young"??? dude i'm not 14!!! i am 19 yrs old..yea i kno its still young and wutever but its better then 14...everyone's making it as if i'm throwing my life away..basically my youth..alright i am in a way..but not completely..just koz i marry young, doesnt mean imma be stuck at home popping out 6 kids while i'm cooking and cleaning! HELL no!.. honestly, wats the BIG deal???? like i said b4, i can still go to college and finish up..have kids later on wen we're ready and settled. i'm not looking to start a family just yet..  .. and yes i kno i've had it better then my parents did wen they were young..and i'm grateful for that..true i dont always show it koz- DUH we're HMONG...who shows gratefulness? vERy few.. dates, friend outings, school stuff..yea i know.. i wasnt born yesterday...i KNOW i've had it better and easier..i've seen some of wat life can offer and i know theres more..but is it so wrong to see and experience the rest with the one i love and wanna marry?? wats the difference in that besides me being tied to someone??..yea honestly...wats the problem huh? wat is the big ass problem with wanting to spend the rest of my life with the one i love and marrying him now or later???????? answer me that. -EDIT: and who the FUCK is DrFeel?!!!!! dude i dont even know u and u all talking like u know me and my situation and shiet!!! u dont know me..and plus dont tell me wat to do wen i dont know even know who u are..AND i AM getting an education thank u very much! just koz i get married doesnt i cant do that anymore...and for ur info he DOES feel the same way.... | |
