yuthpstr2b's Xanga

Life is hard

Tue, 07 Mar 2006 20:25:19 GMT

Through the many trials that I have had to deal with, none of which are extremely hard, i have learned two things; there is a God and i am not Him. When God lets me use Xanga as a place to rant and rave about some bad idea that popped up or try and keep guys from getting into the severe trap of porngraphy, i need to stay humble and learn that not everything that i say is going to reach someone. However when it does i consider it a blessing.

In Reply to the person that commented on what i have been saying, stay strong and live for God. Hopefully your brother will see your life and begin to emulate it. I am not saying show off i am just saying to show love.

In the book affair of the mind, she makes a point of saying that God makes his promises, and that some times it requires EXTREMELY tough love. My prayers are with you and your brother's family. This is not a victimless sin, the whole family is involved and injured in some way.

<>< Always Jonathan

WHAT?????????

Fri, 24 Feb 2006 19:21:30 GMT

Okay that is plain sick!!!!!! I just saw one of the dumbest banners ever. Intimate DATING?????? Seriously? I know that the world is becoming more and more dark, but do people really have to flaunt it? Intimacy can't truly be created within a simple dating relationship. It goes back to my previous post. Intmacy requires friendship, commitment, and passion. people belive that "as long as two people love each other, sex is okay." No stinkin way. God wants all three parts there. Otherwise you have a friendship a confidant or a lover. YOU DON"T HAVE INTIMACY!!!!!!!!!!! It just makes me so angry that people will throw their "love" around just to be accepted. God loves and wants the best for you, He isn't just the big party-pooper in the sky. He wants us to enjoy life and live powerfully. He has set those boundaries to keep us from destroying ourselves.

<>< Jonathan

Monday, February 20, 2006

Mon, 20 Feb 2006 18:53:36 GMT

It is funny the closer I get to understanding what God wants for me the more my craving for porn increases. I seriously think that satan has got some really annoying demons pestering me. They see that i am really getting closer to God and then they hit me with the lust hammer. I pray that God will give me the strength to get away from this pain and sense of adultery in my heart. God has given us the commandments that we need to get stronger. It is our choice to follow his rules or not.

Now before you think oh so God has these rules, and we have to follow them, boy that sounds soooooo loving. Problem with that is that God is also righteous so can not have sin near Him. The rules he has given are out of love. To lust after women with your heart is to deny your self the wonderful relationships that God wants us to have.

Love in the Bible in the book of Song of Solomon is described with three words in the Hebrew:

Rayah meaning friendship

Anhavah meaning committment

Dod meaning passion

so in otherword true matrimonial love requires a R.A.D. feeling. SO what if it is an 80's term it is still cool.

God bless <>< Jonathan

Friday, December 23, 2005

Fri, 23 Dec 2005 13:34:28 GMT

Okay new rules for this blog. Don't come looking here for Porn just because the word porn appears in the blog. I will use every keystroke to speak out against and will point out the errors of anyone who chooses to mess with me. God Bless and Merry Christmas.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Wed, 21 Dec 2005 15:24:03 GMT

My last blog got a comment that tried to insult me, slight problem he didn't run his comment through spell check. So I only chuckled and left it up so that people can see what people think about me.

Sin is so pervasive and so dark in today's society that people lash out at anyone who holds a flame to the darkness. I don't know what is up with that guy but I am sincerely sorry that he feels that way. What was it that he was saying I was a retard for? We may never know.

The bible says that in later times we will listen to false teachers who teach with seared consciences. Is that what some "guidance counselors" may be doing. You know what they say, "oh don't worry he is only trying to understand his sexuality." or even better, "there is nothing wrong with him there is something wrong with nobody, he just wants to find out about women." Pornography is a stain on the fabric of America. During WWII the pilots of bombers would put pictures of bathing suit clad babes on the nosecone of their planes. this was seen as risque now unless the woman has no clothes on is she seen as sexy.

I am sorry but porn has destroyed to many marriages and now the wonderful relationship that my wife and I had built was threatened. We are growing closer together and I really am sorry for the pain I caused her. I love her immensely and hope that everyone who reads this can find a wonderful person to spend their life with.

Prayer requests:

Father in Iraq, sister's fiancee is having to undergo heart surgery.

May the peace that passes all understanding guide your hearts and minds. God bless and go with you<>< Jonathan

Monday, December 19, 2005

Mon, 19 Dec 2005 13:45:12 GMT

Porn a four letter word meaning...to stab your wife through the heart. What is it with this malady of the mind that stabs so deeply? I would have it so that I would just ignore it and it would go away. At times that works but then the overwhelming urge strikes and I am left feeling like slime. With the help of friends I am slowly pulling free of this waste of time. With the prayers of my wife I am being strengthened. And with my God walking beside me I know that if I fall He will be there to pick me up. I was reading in 2 Timothy today and read a verse that said even if we are faithless He is faithful. The commentary I have says that Paul is talking about the unsaved but I feel as if he was talking to me. I guess that I will have to do a little more digging to figure this one out.

Lord on this day I pray that those that think there is no way out of their addiction, will find your heart beating a cadence that will help in the march against their weakness. Lord help me to be good to my wife who loves me no matter what stupid thing I do. Thank you Lord for your goodness and strength, for without either of those things I would just be a shell of a man. Amen

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

Tue, 13 Dec 2005 17:15:30 GMT

Boy oh boy my first exam is today and i am so not ready for it. I am still looking to get a 3.0 this semester but i know that I still am not going to get it. I went to see Narnia yesterday...wow. It stinkin' rocked i was so happy. When I was watching it I was looking for someway that they may have watered down C.S. Lewis' writings, but i got a clear view of what he had us to hear. Our love for God and our commitment to Him are linked and that came through. The triskedellion (liar lunatic or lord) was also spoken. And my favorite part was spoken even though the characters used were changed.

Lucy: Is he a nice Lion?

Mr. Beaver: Nice? I should say not, but He is good.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Wed, 07 Dec 2005 22:00:08 GMT

Wow my first blog does anyone even care? I love my wife and she has allowed me to stay home and finish my wonderful paper for Church History. I finished that and so am now just wasting time until i get up to go eat.
Well God bless you all Merry Christmas.