Holy Merde,
I've been working hard all week and falling asleep at 9-10 pm and waking up at 4-5 am so I was very grateful to my body that I was able to go out to dinner tonight and then do the crazy thing of going to a bar to get beers afterwards with coworkers (Colin and Kathy to be precise.) Work has been good, but nothing to write home about except the sneaking suspection that it might not get easier over here. So tonight we went to Les Braissers...home of artisanel beers and apparently hooligans.
So everyone is minding their own business, French are drinking, we Americans are complaining about work, British soccer/rugby tourists/hooligans are singing what appear to be drunk bar and/or football songs...heck I didnt even realize they were English since drunk people pretty much mumble the same in any language. Anyway, they were English because they all had on rugby kit and were stocky, unhealthy, untanned, blokes who could use some dentistry work. So then one of the Engish gents spilled a tad bit of beer on a group of young french turks (you could tell they were French because of their outrageous accentious.) This was after beer spilling by everyone around...it was a drunken bar after all so it really wasn't unexpected. The English bloke proceeds to say "sorry" in several languages. Apparently one French lad thought that "sorry" meant "your father was a hamster and your mother smelled of elderberries" because he proceeds to walk around a railing and begin sorta doing a 1940 attack thing on the stocky brit after a bit of yelling...sorta 1940 as in it didnt look all that effective and the brits looked more amused. Not content, then the French Bonapart's friends decide that the revolution has begun and they launch a volley of beer mugs, chairs, and 10 L bongs of beer (with no beer, they had sensibly drunk the beer before launching an attack) in the general direction of the English Channel. Now, the funny part was that the average french teenager in the attack, no doubt skilled in setting cars on fire, was maybe all of 65 kilos whereas the English were stocky, 90-100 kilo mutton eating front-line beasts who didnt need to attack the left flank of the French because they could bloody well bull through them. However, the volley of glass objects really shocked them....where were they, had they stumbled into the American Colonies right at Lexington and Concord? These guys were French...The brits had forgotten that nobody stages a riot quite like the sons of Gaul. It was aweseome. Bodies, glass and chairs were flying everywhere and in the middle, as kinda of colonial era in reverse joke was a security guy from the Congo trying to blow on a whistle and get it broken up. The French actually retreated pretty fast after their daring raid leaving the brits kinda jovial, but one with a nick above his eye...nothing compared to the average darby by any standards. Then a Swiss guy comes up and says, "that is shit, I am very sorry that you saw that, it is sad for everyone..." Here I imagine that he then tells us of how the Swiss are peace-lovers who have not made war for 200 years and they are very sorry that must inhabit this continent with such uncouth individuals as the French, Germans, Italians, British, Spaniards, but that the Swedes are OK.
We thought the funniest part was that in the States, assuming no one just got shot, was that the Security would have been some big beefcakes in the middle of a cycle with tasers who would have proceeded to grab the perps, and possibly other people standing too close to girls the bouncers wanted to impress, taser their ass, drag them outside, bang their head against the concrete a couple times and then tell the Cops, "These guys tried to attack us, you'd better bang their heads some more and take them to jail."
So after that we talked with the Swiss guy and his friends (who turned out to be French-Swiss of course) about all kinds of stuff. And then I came home after successfuly staying up to near 3. Cheers to me.