zealousvoyager's Xanga

Monday, August 04, 2008

Mon, 04 Aug 2008 01:35:12 GMT

so the summer has been good. i have been bless to see some people in the youth group grow so much in the Lord. I have seen what it takes to hold a job in a very trying and secular world. I desperately want to be in love but am still holding on to God promise. My heart is healing the deep wounds that I have rent in it. I am trying to fallow Gods leading in life. I fixed and the wrecked my motor cycle and now my shoulder is very sore

Monday, June 23, 2008

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 10:55:25 GMT

It is so that my transgressions have born a withered fruit,
the sun has scorched the rising plans;
alas they have no root, the bleached bones of animals bound by leather strips,
dance through the air with laughter as I wield this wicked whip,
as you did warn me carpenter, this world has weakened my heart,
so easily I disparage, self-seeking the work of my art,
and there you have come to me at the moment I bathe in my sorrow,
so in love with myself, sought after avoiding tomorrow,
where do you find the love to offer he who betrays you?
and offer to wash my feet as I offer to disobey you,
your beauty does bereave me, and how my words do fail,
so faithfully and dutifully I award you with betrayal,
the weak and the down trodden fall on broken legs,
as i walk past a smile I cast, fervor in my stead,
but my bones like plastic, do buckle backward now,
I lay in this field by Judas' bowels and anticipate the plow,
I can not be forgiven; my wages will be paid,
for those more lovely and admirable is least among the saved,
and where would I fit Jesus?
what place is left for me?
the price of atonement is more than i've found to offer up as my plea,
Jesus my heart is all i have to give to you, so weak and so unworthy,
this simply will not do, no alabaster jar, no diamond in the rough,
for your body that was broken, how can this be enough?
by me you were abandoned, by me you were betrayed,
yet in your arms and in your heart forever i have stayed

Your glory illuminates my life, and no darkness will descend,
for you have loved me forever, and your love will never end

In Purity Honor and Valor

Fri, 30 May 2008 10:42:51 GMT

Never have I felt such blessing on my path, never have I faced such impossibility, never have I faced such resistance. But when the Lord is with me who can be against me? I will bring you back to life.

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen!"

Ephesians 3:20-21

Thought: We are the contradiction between who others see us to be and who we know our selves to be.

Thought: Gods Will is not the path we walk but the way we walk it.

Thought: Come broken before the lord daily

Bring me back to Life!

Thu, 29 May 2008 02:04:19 GMT

the ground rushed up at him as he began to descend to the little strip of concert below him. He pulled back on the throttled and eased on the flaps. air rushed under the mighty wings as he neared the earth. suddenly a small light began to flash his instincts reacted and he pushed in the throttle and pulled the nose back into the air. he would have to go around again and find out what was going wrong.
Part 2
as the plane floated lazily through the air he looked down and saw that it was only his second transponder which had been off since the last place he touched down and should not be a problem.

thought: a known weakness is hardly a weakness

A tribute to the Wild Rose...

like a titan holding back a dam. every moment the flood grows as his arms tire. his knees give way and the only rescue is to flee before the flood wipes out everything draws breath.

thought: Last Rites...

I have felt far too much today

So ready to die so ready to give life. if i could be who I was but such wisdom has come with the pain. Lord give me the grace to carry on to far more than I could ever hope or imagine.

antonym of plunge

Sun, 18 May 2008 19:11:22 GMT

from the depths of selfish despair
a quite whisper called me forth
past the hounds of hells gate
to grace upon grace in till my heart over flowed
yet still chains bound my heart
and darkness leeched the light from my life
but still grace abounded and I was exalted above every imagination
darkness yet calls me but the quite whisper holds sway in my heart.

thought: big ankles... lol

thought: my course my own, my destiny unaltered

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Tue, 13 May 2008 01:08:55 GMT

in the middle of a sea of people and drowning in attention but still so alone so terrified so unsure. it is not fear that holds me or pain that binds me but the responsibility of the ages and the gravity of life that weigh me to the ground.

thought: how can it be so wrong or so right?

thought: how can I forgive you for something that I have done?

around my heart are bands of iron that held the broken pieces but now they are healed be the iron cast remains fixed binding my heart in an iron prison. I rest if hope that one day there will be a strength given to break lose every band to glory once again. of not all is truly lost.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Tue, 06 May 2008 01:58:35 GMT

are we meant to be so alone as we plunge into the great unknown?
does terror, joy, life and death rest on the pluck of a foolish bow?

I almost got my Saab working... I think it needs some new gas.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 17:57:41 GMT

on the edge of breaking and still so strong

"Treasure torn out paper from the corner of a page
Measure worn out epigrams for signs of change with age
A figure out that figurative Of Figures A and B
Images I imagined with pretty imagery "

puddles sand and mud pies

Mon, 21 Apr 2008 23:34:25 GMT

state: crazed confidence broken by poignant moments of intense longing and loneliness

thought: come back alive. there is only one thing that i would ask of you, that you would smile again.

thought: healing can only come to the broken

I got a summer job in tullhoma

Intensity

Tue, 15 Apr 2008 04:51:38 GMT

Thought: only a flame is safe in a fire

thought: He love's me at my worst

ponding: in a strictly pragmatic since if people had more kids would life risk be more acceptable because of the growing population?

I am so busy yet still have time for inpatients.

I have a thorn of bitterness that tares my heart and I can not be rid of it. Only the by the blood of Jesus am I able to bear it's pain.