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zeeyoo
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Name: zee =]
Birthday: 1/15/1990
Gender: Female
Interests: my grls<33, BOYS ;], bball, my spurs, GINOBILI<3, chocolate, greetin cards, emo, MUSIC, parties, chattin, silly jokes xP, movies, dvds, reading, SLEEP, food, dr. pepper, laughing =], snow days, shoppin, sittin on my roof, n Jesus <33
Message: message me
AIM:  ohsnapitzzee
Member Since:
5/30/2003
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| tiredcollege = tired 
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| love.what do any of us know about love anyway? that it makes us feel good? that its supposed to sweep you off your feet?
granted, i'm only 18 years old and have had about 1 1/2 serious relationships. (yes. one half.) i mean, i always thought i was in love while i was with that person. i always felt that i could never live without them. now, laying alone in my bed, i don't know if i've ever even come close to love. i look back on all of the wonderful moments that i will cherish for a long time and i think, yea, they were great then, but what about now? i don't feel the same way i did back then and i thought love was supposed to last forever.
maybe it's because im going to college and seeing so many people, so many friends going into what are supposed to be their freedom years with boyfriends and girlfriends. why? why tie yourself down when for the first time, you're really on your own? is it really love? or is it just you being afraid of not having that someone there? because that's what it was for me. i was scared of no longer having someone to lean on and call my own. i was so comfortable having him there that i never stopped to think whether i actually wanted him there because i loved him, or because he made me comfortable...
because now that i've let him go, really let him go, i see that i can live without him...
_edit
haha so after i wrote this, i looked at the entry below and started to laugh =D | | |
| i love you. undoubtedly.
from the moment we met last april, i knew i was in for trouble. your swagger and confidence had me from the start. i knew you would be the worst drug i could ever come into contact with. you were an addiction. i just couldn't get enough. then somehow, along the way, that addiction changed. it wasnt just that i had to have you or that i needed you to keep me alive. no, something happened.
you showed me a different side of you. a side that i never expected would exist in someone like you. your ability to care for others and your capacity for love for your friends and family astounded me. i never expected you to relate to me, yet, you understood me better than my closest friends. you taught me that it was ok to be different and that it shouldn't matter what others thought. you understood my limitations and respected me despite what everyone else said.
so, i took a chance and ended up on the most beautiful and wonderful ride of my life. you took me on a whirlwind trip. i still can't wrap my mind around it. all i know is that i will never be the same. you showed me so many different things in life that i never knew existed. some bad, some good. you taught me to appreciate myself and others, despite our differences.
i love you jay. and i always will...
maybe one day, if we are meant to be...
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| i've changed. i'm just not quite sure how. or if it was for the better.. in fact, i know it wasn't.
God, please save me...
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| UCHICAGO 2012 =D still waitin on duke nd yale tho =/ | | |
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