| First AnniversaryToday is my first anniversary of being in Korea. I have not been back to the States in a year. I have not seen my family in a year. I guess I should be bothered more by this, but on the other hand I'm beginning to realize that my teetering between feeling run down and going completely crazy may be a result of this. My not really being upset about being away for so long is most likely my way of dealing with it. I am putting in my leave request tomorrow for September. I am scared to go home. I'm afraid that I've changed too much and that things back home will have change too much for me to recognize them.
Other things... I've tried to write about them, but I can't explain how I feel right at this moment. I guess the best way to describe it is I'm struggling to not believe that how you see me is how other people see me.
I can't deal with he said, she said, I said, I take it back shit anymore. I have to much to deal with right now on my own. If I take yours on also I won't be able to handle it. That's why I run away. |
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| Who does this?Who gets married to someone they knew for 2 weeks? Apparently he does. The first of them to get married. |
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| Note to self....Headbutting is always a bad idea. |
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| Since my last entry...I have...
Been to a keg party.
Did two keg stands in a row.
Found out an acquaintance is talking shit about me.
Been a bouncer at a change of command ceremony.
Saw my heinous ex.
Not cared.
Been happy.
Worked out some issues with friends.
Learned how to play spades.
Booty danced...quite a few times.
Broke my favorite bracelet booty dancing. (I don't know how either.)
Seen my NCOIC in a leopard print shirt.
Caught a nasty cough from my captain who keeps telling people I have the bird flu.
Been hit on.
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| BackI'm back... I have been for a few days... I was bored the entire time and was hoping to catch up on my sleep this weekend, but that didn't happen. I got to hang out with Hernandez... He was here for the exercise and it was so nice to see him again. I've also run into a few of the New Hampshire people who were here for the last one. This weekend was interesting...mostly because I'm now seeing someone exclusively... I'll have to see how this goes.. I'm having a hard time trusting him...for some reasons and just because of my past experiences also. I've remained fairly...somewhat...detached...obviously not completely but enough that if things do not work out when he comes back that I won't be too suprised or too hurt. Prepare for the worst and hope for the best I guess. I'm getting another tattoo next weekend maybe... Possibly on the upper arm...for some reason that area scares me as being "too noticable" and yet I have tattoos on my wrists...hmm. |
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