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| i need to get over this NOW.
i think ima try NSU and see how it's like cause i totally deserve a break from APO. massive headache from bitches are not worth it. plus, EBOARD failure frustrates me.
im still sad
WHAT THE HAIILLLLLLL!?!?!
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| ive never felt so disappointed in people i trust so much.
so disappointed.
i feel like the third wheel eventhough i came first.
my big wants to pick my housemate up as a little, when she knows so well that i am very possessive of my big. we discussed this and we both conclude that we are equally possessive of our bigs and yet she goes around and does a very decent job at taking mine away from me.
and nobody understands.
i think its time that i give up
because its so obvious that im in the way of two people who obviously want to be close to each other.
and he often tells me that he likes me better than her and that she would not replace me. but his actions tell me otherwise.
im so sad.
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| I DON'T SLEEP.
SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK. WEEAAAKK.
honestly ive been getting less than 4 hours of sleep everyday the past two weeks except for the three day weekend. what the frick. this summer really doesnt feel like summer.
and my liiiife
BARF my liiife out.
honestly.
cheers... or no cheers.. for the hardest working summer of my life.
i honestly feel like i learned more the past month with just dynamics and solid mechanics. you know, living at the library everyday til evening including friday and weekends really is the fantastic living style that ive been wanting. well, its not bad when you have ppl to do the same.
Grades broken down on the midterms so far.
MAE130B dynamics
- midterm 1: 17.5 (A) =]
- midterm 2: 14 (B-) =P
MAE131A solid mechanics
- midterm 1: 16 (A-) =D
- midterm 2: 9 =((((((((((((((((
so what the freaak happened to solids midterm2?
well midterm was thursday. and then lubarda killed us with dynamics midterm friday morning. i honestly thought i did horribly for both... and then worst thing happened when i decided to do solids hw monday night. I FOUND THE SECOND HALF OF MY MIDTERM IN MY NOTES... which means i only turned in the first half. and i emailed lubarda.. following eddy's advice. i got my grade back on tuesday and realized i FUHREAKING stapled first half to blank piece of paper that i thought was the second half of my midterm. and i got a 9/10 on the first problem. i went to lubardas office hour with honestly the worst luck ever. he yelled at me for being immature and irresponsible and repeated endlessly how it was completely 'unacceptable' that i did not check it over that i didnt turn in the complete midterm. BUT he did say he believed i probably would have gotten an A total if i had actually turned in my midterm completed. i honestly cried my eyes out. they were swollen. really really really red and really really really swollen. i cried to the point i didnt have any tears left to cry. but i did cry infront of those i didnt want to have see me cry. i dont mind doing it in front of friends or ppl i feel comfortable with.. but not OTHERS. my competitors and all....
after eddy looked at my entire test... he said i would have gotten either a 18.. or a 17. another "A" midterm
but i did learn something out of yesterday though.
i have awesome friends.
special thanks to:
-MY DAD. for understanding and for saying encouraging words when i expected him to reproach me for my stupidity.
-my roommates that had to listen to me: Jenny, Trisa, and Amy
-my MAE study buddies that were really supportive: Eddy, Tae, George, Mel, Ron, Adesh, and sooo many others.. including all these people that I never really knew were so nice with their encouraging words... Matt, Ish, and Robby. i asked tae to go back to lubarda to ask what a 9/20 stood for... but he went the extra mile and tried to reason it out with lubarda that i deserved more points. lubarda even yelled at him "i dont talk to student's lawyer"
-others: Kaily and Ellis who had to deal with me
and lastly, Michael, my big! he drove down from home to san diego (2 hrs) because he knew something was wrong. well his visit made me happy.. and well, a bit sad at the same time.
I LOVE MY FRIENDS.
AND MY ... LUCK.
today, though,
lubarda told me
"dont be discouraged by what happened. make sure you turn in your final to me and i'll make sure you turn in every single problems. i might have to take a look at your final individually.. so do your best. i have to study your performance on this final a bit more than others."
so everybody was right.
it was a good thing for me to go up and talk to him after all eventhough he yelled at me a lot a lot a lot.
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| its time to accept the reality *sigh*
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on the other note, im still studying for solid mechanics.
my midterm is happening in 7 hours.
I NEEEED AN A.
i want to beat them all.
and tomorrow, i should also be up at this exact same time... because lubarda is crazy and made sure he assigned two midterms back to back thursday and friday. i'm screwed for dynamics. THAT'S FOR SURE. | | |
| I feel like throwing up.
I think it's the coffeeee
save meeee, i have two midterms at the end of this week.
Solid Mechanics on Thursday
Dynamics on Friday
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i miss home
and for some odd reason, i really feel like hanging out with my biggg. too bad hes off in hk riiight now
ahhh summer school please end now!
NOTE: i think ill be suffering an all-nighter toniiiight =(
adios.
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