11:15 PM  July 21, 2004

           " Life is like a beautiful melody, only the lyrics are messed up"

 *sigh* wow... life.. is crazy... UH IS CRAZY .. jeez!!! to be pre- health .. u need all this stuff!! its like ,... just be pre-med... =OP not really... but u know.. huge mountain.   like .. 2 years of chems and bio... damn.... and the whole MUSIC MINOR thing.... THAT will be the ONLY courses that I will take that i ENJOY taking for my minor/major.....  =O/ is it possible to pre-health.. major in bio or chem.. and then minor in music?... i think its possible... cuz ur pre-health covers all ur bio and chem major requirements... or most .. and then u can always minor along w/ ur major...   .. i think i wanna do that....

next!  hotness!! all around!!   at NSO, ( orientation ) dis guy ... =O)  but yeah... he was kool.. nice.... fucking in the honors program.... =O( so i didnt see him after... but that was all... o wellz.... 

we had to watch a play... about rape... ..  dayum....  =O/  

life is a huge wake up call...  when life is .. created* or taken... it makes you think... or when life is changed up... put on the dangerous side ... forced to look at things that you always say while watching on the news.. * the chances that will happen to me are slim*  today.. i heard there was a 9 car pileup on the H1 ewa bound... 9 cars.atleast NINE people whos lives were shaken up...       ... u walk out ur door... not known if ur gonna walk through that door again...

these are kooll... lil pessimistic.. but .. who isnt .. just a lil?

- " enjoy life. Theres plenty of time to be dead"

-" Dont take life seriously because you cant come out of it alive" - Warren M.

-" the purpose of life is a life of purpose" - Robert Byrne

Sunday, July 11, 2004

hey... wow.. s'been a while!

kinda weird.. lil awkward.. sorta scared

i dont know how i feel about  _ ne more .  everything was going fine.. and then i realized something... and now its... crazy .... crazy not knowing.. spinning around and around in ur own head.. not knowing which thought to stick to..... only one for sure.... maybe two... but scared....................

BUT thats not ALL thats going on in my life... mmm  OH 

     - GOT MY NEW VIOLIN!!!   actually about a lil less than a month ago.  =O) sooo happy!!! its not new either!!! its really kool... it was made in 1920.  revarnished so its a lil cheaper.. not better for the violin though... o wellz... its still really really good. 

     -  I SPENT $400.00 ON A BOW.  jeez... u never EVER thought that a piece of wood and some hair on a horses ass could be put together to form that much mulahz.... but apparently.. i was looking at the really really cheap ones.  MR. CORREA is looking for a $2000.00 bow.  i wonder how much his violin is..      its worth it ... i love you, my violin.....

     - i miss you my first violin!!!  i seriously genuinly miss you!!! u were there when  i sucked ass and was last chair in the orchestra.... you helped me keep wanting to play so much that i didnt realize that i was  " practicing "   and  by doing that, you helped land THRID chair in 8th grade.  * remember? we beat out privately lessoned people!!!*   you were there when we first walked into the HUGE  ~*(back then)*~ band room at MHS.  you were there when we  " wowwed"  Mr. Hayakawa and Mrs. Hesch.  you were there when I made first chair second violin! and then, we went up to first violin section .. that SAME year!!!   remember that really great ending concert w/ the chamber orchestra? the best and last REAL concert we had?  

im sorry.. i didnt mean to Not say goodbye to you... i didnt know that they were gonna take you sooo soon .. i wanted soo much to thankyou for making the player i am now.  for being there for me.. for letting me tear ur strings up when i was mad... for sounding soo beautiful when i was sad.. near tears.. 
for inspiring me to sound better, to play better, to be a better player.  to be a better violinist.   Thankyou...  i miss you...........   love ya!

and other news?

i miss you.... ? i think its miss... im scared for you too...  i did love you... it was real.... 

   i miss you my violin!!! i love you.... =O) 

    *** yeah.. i know all y'all are all like " wtf..." .. psycho girl..  - whatever.. u dont play a violin.. or string instrument.. u have no clue...  so SHAaaaaDDUP and if never had ur OWN instrument that u GREW on... since the beginning.. i dont know what u feel....   .............  jeez i miss my violin...................................... *******

its kool... im ok =O)  

6.20.04

Hey... wutsup pepo? wow.. i havent rote in there for some time.... nothing much happened... ish.... i got a job!!!  Quiznos baby!!! toasted subs! its good... trust me... it sux that i cant eat while i work... cuz it looks soo good.... o wellz...

mmm i feel sooo guilty... untruthful... but then again... i feel like it doesnt matter anymore... but still.. it was rong of me to do that...yea...ya'll are prolly like.. what the fuck is she talking about...  its ok.  no one really knows... im just tryna figure out how i feel...   so... im sooo dissapointed.. REALLY REALLY disapointed ...  more than im angry... and angry more than im sad/ hurt... or broken in an organ... i cant believe pepo would do that.... i mean.. i know they do.. but ... THAT person did it... and its.... much lower than what i expected.... its not what id expect.  whatever....

*sigh* this summer is gonna suck.. and its gonna be soooo sad.... =O( it sux bad....   argh...   

WHeeeEEeeeE!

Monday, May 03, 2004

Hey… wow.. look… its prolly been more than a month… o wellz… but wut is Sylvia doing so fucking late at night… * for me …*……lets see…. No fuckin popup told me that I needed to press the fuckin “ record” button.Fuckers… and nothing told me that it wasn’t already set…. Fuckers…. Shit.I would’ve been done more than 3 hours ago.But no……. wtf.SoI figure out y it wont record. .. and I try it again.. and what happens??? The fuckin batteries run out.WTF….

After I recharge the fuckin batteries…. I cant get the fucked up shit to work and stuff… so I have to render the fucked up tape again!!!!Ok.So I do that.And this time… about 1 fucking short minute to the end… the fuckin batteries run out .. a- fucking – gain.

So this is where I am…. Charging batteries close to midnight… after 12, ill take the batts out.. and record… after that… ill go the fuckintv… and hope that it fuckin records.. which is should.. shouldn’t it??!!!

It better fuckin work.Im be sooo pissed off… I already am….

Fuckers.

Sunday, March 14, 2004

Heyhey~ LOOKIE!!! Im updating again!!!=O) lotsa stoopid pissy stuff happened between ^^ then ^^ and << now>> ... like... for example...

I almost got into an accident on the freeway during traffic hour.I swear ... scared the shit outta me... ... I was cutting lane to get to the second lane by the shoulder lane.. and there were packed cars.. and this lady/man let me pass.. so I was like.. KOOL...and JUST as I got about half way in.. another car speeds into the lane on my side!!! Like.. he was going super fast!!! But we dint hit.. so... wutever... my mom though... DAMN.. she can kill you jus by screaming... and shes not that great of a driver either.

Ooooo!!! I LOVE THIS FONT!!! “ Hand printing” ... I used to write in this font.. until xanga started having trouble w/ it some time ago.=O/o wellz.

sigh * ... that’s not a lot that’s happened is it.Well... 3^rd Q is coming to an end sooo fast... I hope it gets faster... but 4^th QT is jus gonna fly by... I hope.. but not really... wuteverz... o wellz.

Oh.. the pissy stuff.... my mom ... omg... this is sooo stoopid.... my mom was ... debating w/ herself about whether or not to buy me the prom dress I wanted ... and one of her things for buying it was like.. that id be a better daughter .. blah blah.... BUT the store has a no return policy!!!!So once she buyz it.... .. it doesn’t matter if I am a good daughter or not!!!!!=O) and she did.... HAHAHAHA=O)

God datz sooo stoopid....

o.. that’s not pissy... that’s jus.... hahaha.. o wellz.... iono.... I gess I jus felt like writing../ typing... / talking...? gonna go... mineswell sleep.Nothing better to do.Good nite~